| I grew up going on and off to church with my family. We always stopped going because my dad would find something wrong with the church. Then came the time when my family just stopped going to church. I was fine with it- I didn't have to wake up early and spend a boring day with my family. Church didn't have anything to offer me. All it was to me was a life of rules and regulations- no fun in that. All I wanted to do was have fun and party. One Sunday, out of nowhere, I wanted to go to church. My boyfriend (at the time) and I decided to go to his old church. We went to the Vineyard Church- where I still attend- and I was amazed. It wasn't like any church I had ever visited. There was a live band and people were dancing and acting crazy. I don't remember the exact message that day, but I do remember it had something to do with God's love. It never occured to me before that God loved me. All I had heard about at church was how to deal with sin and live a godly life, nothing about love. The excitement the message brought stayed with me the rest of the day. That night I went to bed and I could not stop thinking about death. I knew I wasn't going to heaven, but when I thought about death I didn't see any flames. All I saw was darkness- emptiness- the thought of being alone in this black hole the rest of eternity with my thoughts. It scared the crap out of me, even the flames were better than this.. I decided right then that I didn't want that and asked the Lord into my heart. I struggled for two months after that with the Lord. I knew that the Lord wanted something of me- I had stopped partying and I didn't know what else he wanted me to do. After an ongoing battle, the Lord showed me that I needed to focus solely on him. I broke up with the guy I was seeing and made a promise to the Lord that I would not date anyone for a year. That seemed like a long time to me and I didn't know how I was going to do it. The Lord surprised me though, and I made it easily through that year. And he blessed me by bringing me five wonderful people to share my life with when life at home was rough. My walk with the Lord has not been easy. No one ever said it was. I gave up my life as Captain and starting point guard of my varsity basketball team to focus solely on him. Let me tell you that was one of the hardest things I have ever had to do- basketball used to be my life. I went from popular to unexistent over night. I was persecuted at home by my family- to the point where I was almost thrown out. But the Lord blessed me by surrounding me with wonderful people who were there for me. I've grown up fast- I've only been a Christian for a year and a half. I've been put in situations where I couldn't just be content with where I was at- I had to grow. I've been blessed beyond anything I could imagine and I woudn't change any of it. Life is an ongoing testimony. |