'Ruby don't take your love to town'
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| Ruby's story....an exercise based around the possible back story to the Kenny Rogers song 'Ruby don't take your love to town' |
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| Why Joe, Why? | |||||||||||||||||||
| Why don't you ever say something...instead of just sneaky peeking at me out of the corner of those big ole eyes of yours? I can see you watching me Joe, I can see that all scrunched up gritty teeth hurt look on your face. What the hell do you expect from me? I don't have the answers... | |||||||||||||||||||
| It wasn't supposed to be like this. When we got married it was supposed to be happy ever after and all that jazz...but that wasn't enough for you was it? You had to go and be the great big stupid hero. God alone knows why? | |||||||||||||||||||
| Do you ever think about it Joe? Our wedding day I mean...Do you ever close your eyes and picture me in that dress, flowers in my hair and in my arms and that stupid smile plastered all over my silly face? My feet never touched the ground as I floated around on my own little bubble of happiness....And then you had to go and burst that bubble of mine with your hero antics. It was okay for you going away and playing at soldiers while I sat here night after night scared that you weren't coming home...and then when you did...God forgive me, I wished you hadn't. | |||||||||||||||||||
| Why didn't you die out there Joe? What on earth made you want to come home to this? To put yourself through this? To put me through this...It's so unfair. | |||||||||||||||||||
| You lay there, helpless as a baby...your chocolate eyes begging silently. I can't, I daren't look too deep because if I did, it would break my heart. | |||||||||||||||||||
| What a waste...what a waste of the vibrant young man I married, the one who had a life filled with promise ahead of him. He died out there and in his place they sent me a shell . A man whose once smooth cheek is now rough from other people's shaves, whose hair sticks to his neck, or plastered to the pillow, and always smells faintly of sweat and despair. | |||||||||||||||||||
| What do you see when you look at me Joe? Who is Ruby? As I stand here in front of the mirror and smooth lipstick over my reluctant smile, I ask myself what have I become? I'm not sure I want to know the answer to that question. | |||||||||||||||||||
| I know that you know where I'm going. If only you asked me, I would stay. If only you would hold me, caress me, kiss me. I'm a woman Joe. I need to feel the touch of another on my skin now and again. I need to feel loved...but you don't love me anymore. I see fear and loathing reflected in those frightened eyes of yours...and it scares me....the intensity of your pain fixed on me like a vise. I get the feeling you'd like to choke me, to put your hands around my neck and squeeze...and never stop. Can you tell me you don't feel that way? I don't think so....But you can't even do that can you....Sweet Jesus, Joe. | |||||||||||||||||||
| In a few minutes I am going to turn to you and, with my bestest smile fixed rigidly in place, I will tell you I'm just popping out for a while...I'll smooth your hair, plump your pillows. I'll put the tv remote where you can reach it and all the time you will just look at me and not say those words I long to hear...and so I'll go and I'll meet up with the usual crowd and they'll ask after you and we'll drink some...and then some more and we'll dance a little and flirt and eventually when the drink hits my brain I'll even laugh a little...that hollow tinny sound...nothing like the music you and I used to make in the days when we smiled with our eyes and with our hearts and not just our mouths..... So why Joe why? Why don't you just give up and die and give us both our freedom.....? | |||||||||||||||||||
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