Exodus: Existence
Four corners Showtime Title Number One Contendership: Last Man Standing rules (no winning by DQ, pin or a submission)
Tim Tewolde .vs. "Extreme" Jeff Markovich .vs. Chris Staggs .vs. "Slick" Richard Rick
Is this match going to have an impact? Only on Chris Staggs's career
Does Tim Tewolde, Jeff Markovich, or Richard Rick have the ability to win? Fuck No
Does Tim Tewolde, Jeff Markovich, or Richard Rick have the talent to win ? It appears they don't
Is Chris Staggs going to be the next Showtime Champ? You got that right
How is the match going to end? Elimination of all by Chris Staggs
ǧ[ Well, Well, Well just under twenty-four hours till the match and still the three rejects don't have a chance Just under twenty-four hours till the paying fans get to see total domination by Chris Staggs. Just under Twenty-four hours till Jeff, Tim, and Rick realize they are not on the same level as Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs. Just under Twenty-four hours till Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs shows to the three rejects that his is better then them. Just under Twenty-four hours till Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs claims the number one contendership for the Showtime Title. Come tomorrow we will see who was talkin shit and who was just stating the facts. I bet Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs is the latter. I mean come do any of you three really think you are better then Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs. Sure you say you are but does you gut feeling tell you different. I think it does. I think it tells you that you have no chance of winning. It tells you that you are not the same calibier athlete Chris is. I think it tells you that you would be better off no even showing up to get you ass knocked out. I think you should listen to your gut-feeling before you are taken out. It would be the wisest move. Then again I am talking to complete idiots who do not comprehend a damn word anybody is telling them. They continue to run there mouth and say that they are going to win while the rest of the world knows that Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs will be the victor. Oh Tim, Jeff, and Rick that means the winner. I mean I know you haven't heard that word much with your name now have you. Anyway I mean you three can come down and waste your energy along with Chris's time as he will have lay each one of you out. Then after those five minutes Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs can focus back on the Showtime Title Why try fighting fate. You know it will not change. Accept it, you three are nothing more the Mediocre. And you will be mediocre the rest of your average lives. Deal with it. Well, Rick has dealt with it by skipping town and changing his name to Pedro The Fighting Chicken near Mexico City. While the other two, Tim Tewolde and Jeff Markovich, seem to be fixed on that they are not mediocre. Okay, you might be average ,but that is tops. Tomorrow Night you are going to witness a beginning of a great as Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs begins to climb The Ladder of Success ]ǧ
ǧ[Tim Tewolde, I am sorry that ever got you to cut promos. Now you are on the television 24/7 talking about meaningless shit with idiotic characters. Tim, you think you are a wrestling great? You think you are a wrestling legend as Jeff Markovich said. You think you are going to the be the number one contender? Well you couldn't be more wrong. You are none and you will be any of them. Face it you are nothing but a mediocre wrestler who has lived in the mid card area for his whole career. Tim come on you are taking on one of the SWF best. If though you want to be stubborn and think the way you have thought the whole week that is fine by me cause Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs will prove you wrong. I mean you get mad at Chris Staggs comment about you but Chris is only stating the oblivious but you can't get in check with reality enough to understand that. So you go around in a dream world thinking you are better. Who the hell can you keep doing that after you have lost you last three matches and soon to be fourth? Are you that dislugnal?. Hell most of the American fan know that you have no chancerstand it, even if they had recieved education from the United States so called "School systems", what a joke. Hey wait.......He already poked fun at it before. Damnit. Ah, anyway Tim you want to continue and think that you are going to come out on top this Sunday. Then go on ahead, keep on believing, till Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs dims your lights as you can't get up to meet the ten count. Tim , I mean you can actually think you are better then Staggs. You can't actually think you have a shot at winning. You can't actually have any common sense. Tim Tewolde, do us favor now and realize this simple thing......YOU HAVE NO SKILLS. An if you do that the you may be able to walk out of the Arena tomorrow night. ]ǧ
ǧ[ "Slick" Rick Richards, why do I bother. I mean it already seems to have gotten the point unlike two other rejects and decided to shut the hell up and not risk getting crippled by the hands of Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs. You don't want to hurt your brain in trying to outsmart and outwit. You know you can't match wits with Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs. You know you have no shot of winning. "Slick" Rick Richard I mean I give you credit at least you have enough of a brain to get it through your head. While the others are another story. But its not like Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs will take it lightly on you though. He is still going to beat you till you are in dream world, "Slick" Rick Richards, I know you don't still think that Chris Staggs will be push over. You have figured out that Chris "the Main Eventer" Staggs isn't a push-over. Also that if you didn't shut up you would end up in the nearest hospital. Exodus: Existence you have don't have a chance of winning why show up. If you somehow think you can survive five minutes in the ring with Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs, don't kid yourself. You know that Chris will become the number contender for the title, but Jeff Markovich and Tim Tewolde haven't. ]ǧ
ǧ[ "Extreme" Jeff Markovich, have you finally ran out of steam? Have you finally shut the hell up? I for one hope so. I don't think I could have taken another one I mean your like Tim Tewolde. You just can't realize the facts. You still want to hang on to your dreams. Face it Jeff, your dreams are just that.....dreams. Jeff, I take it you weren't the brightest of your class. I take it that you haven't been same since that night you saw Bambi's mother get shot.. I mean come Jeff do you actually believe half the shit you continue to say? I mean Jeff, can you really look at yourself in the mirror and believe what you are saying cause I can't and I don't' think the wrestling fans can't either. Everyone except you and Tim know that I have the match won. You can talk and talk till you turn blue in the face but the fact still remains the same, you don't have a chance in hell of beating me. When you step into the ring with Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs, you are stepping into the ring with a great. I mean is it cause you lack so much ability, talent, and knowledge that even the most mediocre wrestler looks like a legend. . Jeff, I am better then you three. You don't get that none of you have a chance of beating me. "Extreme" Jeff Markovich you don't have the talent that Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs has to win the 4-Way Last Man Standing match. ]ǧ
ǧ[Tomorrow Night when these wrestlers try to take on Staggs with all their might and wind up layed out on the canvas, just remember that Staggs warned you that he has more skill, ability, intelligence, endurance, and almost everything then all three of you put together. Which only means five words for Chris Staggs "Showtime Title Number One Contender" . See ya bitches in the ring. Now that is out of the way there are only three words left..... ROLL THE PROMO ]ǧ
ǧ[ Camera opens up with a shoot of the outside of the door of the hotel room Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs is staying in. The door opens as you see Chris Staggs sitting on the couch watch television. It appears to be a Tim Tewolde promo that is on. Chris Staggs sighs a relief as the promo ends. Then Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs looks up and spot the SWF camera crew . ]ǧ
¤¤[ Chris "the Main Eventer" Staggs ]¤¤ What the hell is wrong with you, Tim? Can't you see understand that I am better then you?.
¤¤[ Greg The Perky T.G.I. Friday's waiter ]¤¤ I don't think those guys were from T.G.I. Friday's either
¤¤[ Chris "the Main Eventer" Staggs ]¤¤ What?!?
¤¤[ Greg The Perky T.G.I. Friday's waiter ]¤¤ I said
¤¤[ Chris "the Main Eventer" Staggs ]¤¤ Anyway.....Tim, face it you are a no talent hack, You are facing Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs that equals a lose for you. But then again that is not unusal for you is it. Come on
¤¤[ Greg The Perky T.G.I. Friday's waiter ]¤¤ Yeah Tim,
¤¤[ Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs ]¤¤ Let me talk damnit
¤¤[ Greg The Perky T.G.I. Friday's waiter ]¤¤ OKIE DOKIE
¤¤[ Chris "the Main Eventer" Staggs ]¤¤ *sighs* And Slick Rick where are you? Have you actually moved to Mexico to pick up chicken fighting and changes your name to Pedro The Fighting Chicken? Where the fuck are you?
¤¤[ Greg The Perky T.G.I. Friday's waiter ]¤¤ YEAH!
ǧ[Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs gives a pissed off look to Greg The Perky T.G.I. Friday's waiter . ]ǧ
¤¤[ Greg The Perky T.G.I. Friday's waiter ]¤¤ Sorry.....Man.......
¤¤[ Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs ]¤¤ Anyway Slick Rick if you do decide to come to New York and step into the ring with Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs you will end up with your buddy in the nearest hospital. Slick Rick or Pedro, you need to stay down there it is much safer
¤¤[ Greg The Perky T.G.I. Friday's waiter ]¤¤ Yeah, oops damnit
¤¤[ Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs ]¤¤ Do you need to leave?
¤¤[ Greg The Perky T.G.I. Friday's waiter ]¤¤ Sorry, I can't help it
¤¤[ Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs ]¤¤ Fuck, anyway last and lease we have Jeff who has either be affected for that low blow by the MTV VJ or the world is coming to an end as Jeff has ran out of things to lie about? Anyway Jeff you are like the other two....AVERAGE You are not a mid card yet you are not a curtain jerker. You are in the grey area of things.
ǧ[You hear a knock at the door as Chris Staggs walks over and opens it as room service comes in with a tray full of food. Chris looks at Greg to seem to ask if he order the food. Greg The Perky T.G.I. Waiter shakes his head no . ]ǧ
¤¤[ Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs ]¤¤ Umm we didn't order any food
¤¤[ Room Service ]¤¤ Yes you did. It says the food order for room 412
¤¤[ Greg The Perky T.G.I. Friday's waiter ]¤¤ But,
¤¤[ Room Service ]¤¤ But nothing it says you ordered the food not pay me or I will have to call the police
¤¤[ Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs ]¤¤ For what?
¤¤[ Room Service ]¤¤ For uh uh uh
¤¤[ Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs ]¤¤ That's what I thought, now get the hell out of here before we call the manager of this place
¤¤[ Room Service ]¤¤ Okay, *under his breath * Damn SWF wrestlers think they are the shit, I could take them.
ǧ[ Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs slams the door and walks back to the couch . ]ǧ
¤¤[ Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs ]¤¤ Damn this hotel
ǧ[ Greg The Perky T.G.I. Waiter rolls his eyes and looks at Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs ]ǧ
¤¤[ Greg The Perky T.G.I. Friday's Waiter ]¤¤ Yeah tell me about it.
ǧ[ Another knock at the door as Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs opens the door to see a bunch of Police standing there . ]ǧ
¤¤[ Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs ]¤¤ Umm, hello officers what can I do?
¤¤[ Police Officer ]¤¤ Sir are you okay?
¤¤[ Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs ]¤¤ Umm, yeah why?
¤¤[ Police Officer ]¤¤ Someone called the station and said a code red was taking place
¤¤[ Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs ]¤¤ Umm, What's that?
¤¤[ Police Officer ]¤¤ The worst thing you can have in a hotel
¤¤[ Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs ]¤¤ What's that?
¤¤[ Police Officer ]¤¤ A Postal Midget on a Sugar rush
¤¤[ Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs ]¤¤ ummm okay? Their hasn't been any Postal Midget on a sugar rush around here.
¤¤[ Police Officer ]¤¤ Oh, sorry for disturbing you, but if you see a crazy midget call us
¤¤[ Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs ]¤¤ Ummm okay.
ǧ[ The police leave the doorway as Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs shuts the door and returns to the couch.]ǧ
¤¤[ Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs ]¤¤ Okay what the hell was up with that........Damn pranks, Anyway let me finish this promo by letting you all know why I am going to win the match tomorrow night. Cause...
I AM THE BEST DAMN TECHNICAL WRESTLER -- PERIOD
ǧ[ Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs looks the camera men and then back at the television as a idiotic Roma promo hits the air waves ]ǧ
ǧ[ Camera fades black ]ǧ
TODAY'S LESSON: DON'T EVER MESS WITH A MIDGET WHO IS HOLDING A CANDY BAR!!!!!!
¤¤[ Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs ]¤¤ What an idiot....
