Exodus: Existence
Four corners Showtime Title Number One Contendership: Last Man Standing rules (no winning by DQ, pin or a submission)
Tim Tewolde .vs. "Extreme" Jeff Markovich .vs. Chris Staggs .vs. "Slick" Richard Rick
Is a 4 corner Last Man Standing match going to be a breeze for Chris Staggs? Yes
Does Tim Tewolde, Jeff Marovich, or Richard Rick have chance of winning? Fuck No
Does Tim Tewolde, Jeff Markovich, or Richard Rick know that they are going to get there ass kicked? It looks like
Is this going to lead to gold? You better believe it
How is the match going to end? Tim Tewolde, Jeff Markovich, and Richard Rick laid out COLD
ǧ[ Well, Well, Well it seems that the competition has came out of there daze and realized that they are facing Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs. They have also figured out that have no shot of becoming the Number one contender for the Showtime Title. I mean that is all they have focused on lately. They are concerned, which they should be, that Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs is going to beat them till they are out cold on the floor. I mean it seems since Chris's last promo Jeff and Tim have tried with all their might and conjure up enough knowledge to make their comebacks and insults. I am sure they are now taking asprin for heads trying to think up all those childish remarks. While "Slick" Rick Richard has apparently headed for the hills. I guess he didn't want to go through the humilation of getting his ass handed to him on pay per view. Anyway if he does decide to show up he will have the same fate as the other two that is a nap at the hands of Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs. I am sure by now that they have seen Thrillzone and seen the damage Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs can do to you. They now that they have no chance but if they want to try to use the little amount of brain cells they have and come out with new and dull idiotic promos to try and somehow throw Chris Staggs off his game. Go on ahead. It won't work. I mean you are talking about a guy that is way above your level. A man that has more skill and talent then all three of you combined. I mean come on all three of you know that Chris Staggs is going to face the winner of Roma and Broadway for the title. Its just that simple. All this match is to have a match for the Pay Per View. Kramer knows that this match isn't going change the match for Aderaline Staggs vs. Broadway. That is another reason he booked it I mean all Staggs has to do is severely beat three other guys down till they can't meet a ten count. That is no sweat when it comes to wrestling, and let's face it Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs isn't facing exactly the greatest wrestlers the SWF has to offer ,but then again no one came meet Staggs level ]ǧ
ǧ[Tim Tewolde oh my god, you finally learned how to talk. Congrats. But then again it seems that the only words you learned make you sound like a total retard ,but don't get me wrong it is an improvement in your case. Tim what do you expect to accomplish with that promo you put out. You think if you continue to say you are going to win that it will happen. Slim chance. I mean come on it took you awhile to beat up a old geezer. How in the hell can you expect to beat a great as of Chris Staggs and two mediocre like Jeff and Rick. Tim you can stop doing promos now I think you finally have reached the lowest of the low in promos. I mean what the hell was with that promo. Who the hell cares about a British Scientist who likes dressing up like Jeff Markovich. Then if that isn't enough you add the ultimate bomb with Richard Simmons. Are you a complete idiot or just plain brain dead. Tim all you did with that promo was prove Chris Staggs's point that you will not be a factor in the outcome of the match because of your complete and total ignorance Yet, Tim finds his way in consideration for the number one contender for the Showtime Title. Kramer wants me to become the Showtime champ for sure.Tim Tewolde you want to get your hopes of becoming the Showtime Champion you might as well stop right now. There is absolutly no way you can even luck this match out much less win it out right. I know you don't have enough ability to even hang with the likes of "Slick" Rick Richards and "Extreme" Jeff Markovich much less Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs. Tim Tewolde why try to think up new insults and comeback that try to sound witty and humorous. It will just end up hurting your head before Chris Staggs does. ]ǧ
ǧ[ "Slick" Rick Richards, seems to have gotten the point quicker then the other two. He has decided to not hurt his head in trying to outsmart and outwit Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs. "Slick" Rick Richard I mean its not like Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs will take it lightly on you though. He is still going to beat you senseless, wait that would be too quick and you would still be on your feet. "Slick" Rick Richards if you still think that Chris Staggs will be push over then go on ahead till the match is over and you are being taken to the nearest hospital then you finally realize that Chris Staggs is not a push over but the guy that kicked your ass all over the ring at Exodus: Existence. So you still think you can outlast Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs in becoming the number contender for the title, but like Tim Tewolde will not be a factor in the outcome.As Chris Staggs will defeat you with ease HE will do that to the other two. "Slick" Rick Richards you need to stay where you are at right now and save yourself the beating and suffering that you will get if you show up Sunday Night.If you get this point you might actually have some sense after all ,but if you don't you will end up in the local New York hospital in the bed next your buddy "Extreme" Jeff Markovich. Your chance of the victory Sunday Night. Is about the same chance as Jeff being straight as an arrow. Chris Staggs will prove that he is a great Sunday night at Exodus: Existence ]ǧ
ǧ[ "Extreme" Jeff Markovich, I take that back about you being the dumbest of the three, it seems that you think Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs will be a factor in the outcome of the match. And you are damn well right about that. "Extreme" Jeff Markovich you still don't have a chance when you step into the ring with Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs but hey atleast you are not the dumbest of the three, Tim's promo took the cake. Anyway Jeff you are still deprived of total knowledge as you thought it was impressive that I went so called "toe-to-toe" with Jason Rothchild. That isn't an accomplishment. Jason Rothchild hasn't done anything in the SWF except choke everytime he got a shot at the title. What the hell are you thinking? But then again you have one thing going for you that the other two don't. You are from the great country of Canada. Even if it is Montreal. Jeff, you see you don't get that I am better then you three. You don't get that none of you have a chance of beating me. You don't get that you like the other two will wind up at the nearest hospital. You just don't get it do you Jeff. Staggs is the best damn wrestler in the match and can be the most extreme in the match. Just ask Joey Ca$h. "Extreme" Jeff Markovich you must not think Chris Staggs is capable of taking all three of you out just like that. You would have taken my point like your partner did and shut the hell up. But you didn't and for that you will wind up laid out next to Rick and Tim. Yo couldn't be more wrong when you said you were going to win the contendership. "Extreme" Jeff Markovich you can talk all the trash me and Tim Tewolde. Sure pick on the retard too, but if you focus on him and me all match. That just leaves it open for Rick to stab to in the back. Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs will betaking you out for the ten count. "Extreme" Jeff Markovich you have as much chance of being the number one contender as you have of Tim being capable of making an intelligent statement That isn't much of a chance for you is it now? "Extreme" Jeff Markovich you don't have the talent that Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs has to win the 4-Way Last Man Standing match. ]ǧ
ǧ[ So come this Sunday Night when these wrestlers try to take on Staggs with all their might and wind up face down on the canvas, just remember that Staggs has more skill, ability, intelligence, endurance, and almost everything then all three of you put together. Which only means five words for Chris Staggs "Showtime Title Number One Contender" . Now that is out of the way there are only three words left..... ROLL THE PROMO ]ǧ
ǧ[ Camera opens up in a busy streets of New York as you see Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs and Greg The Perky T.G.I. Friday waiter standing near the sidewalk as Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs is trying to hail a cab. Finally after three taxis pass Chris Staggs puts his arm down. ]ǧ
¤¤[ Chris "the Main Eventer" Staggs ]¤¤ What the hell is wrong with these drivers
¤¤[ Greg The Perky T.G.I. Friday's waiter ]¤¤ I told you the subway was quicker then getting a taxi
¤¤[ Chris "the Main Eventer" Staggs ]¤¤ Yeah if you don't get off at the wrong stop
¤¤[ Greg The Perky T.G.I. Friday's waiter ]¤¤ How many times do I got to keep saying I am sorry
¤¤[ Chris "the Main Eventer" Staggs ]¤¤ Just get a cab
¤¤[ Greg The Perky T.G.I. Friday's waiter ]¤¤ Okay I will
¤¤[ Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs ]¤¤ Alright, Now while we wait for a taxi to stop here let's talk about my upcoming four way last man standing match at Exodus. First off lets talk about Tim Tewolde, the guy has finally decided to quit hiding and try to join "Extreme" Jeff Markovich and "Slick" Rick Richards in trying to make childish insults at Chris Staggs. Example " 3 inches oh wait you meant his actual height" Yeah I haven't heard that one before.I mean come on Tim, wait I bet that took you about three days to think up didn't it? I mean you use words you don't even know the meaning of. You call me a Quadriplegic, now if I was a quadriplegic answer me this question, How the hell could I be standing here much wrestling matches. You see Tim, don't use big words like that if you don't know the damn meaning. All is does is end up with me making you looking stupid. Tim you haven't been heard from for weeks now and then you come out with the dumbest promo I have ver seen in my wrestling. I think it is better that you stay quiet now on. Its for the best. But what gets me the most is somehow you manages to get a shot at the Number One Contendership for the Showtime title. You have did nothing to deserve a shot. All you did was lose match after match. How the hell am I suppose think you are something when all you do is get pinned. I mean Tim Tewolde do you actually think you have a chance of beating me? You got to be kidding yourself. You know it, I know it, the rest of the world knows it. You are just another wannabe main eventer who tries to make his name from beating Chris Staggs. Tim, you are facing one of the best the SWF has to offer and you still think you have a chance you are more messed up then Jeff Marovich friends. Tim lets face the facts you have little talent, little skills, and no high school education. So Tim don't get your hope up in becoming the number one contender. That will only leads to a bigger disappointment then your mother disappointment when you were born.
¤¤[ Greg The Perky T.G.I. Friday's waiter ]¤¤ Hey, I think I got one.
¤¤[ Chris "the Main Eventer" Staggs ]¤¤ You sure?
¤¤[ Greg The Perky T.G.I. Friday's waiter ]¤¤ Yeah, he's slowing down
¤¤[ Chris "the Main Eventer" Staggs ]¤¤ Good,
ǧ[ Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs and Greg The Perky T.G.I. Friday's waiter walk toward the taxi as the taxi burns rubber and takes off leaving Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs and Greg The Perky T.G.I. Friday's waiter in the dust. ]ǧ
¤¤[ Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs ]¤¤ WHAT THE FUCK! THOSE LAZY ASSHOLES.Speaking of lazy assholes, lets talk about a guy by the name of "Slick" Rick Richard. The guy decided to call me a push-over then disappear never to be heard from again. How do you ever conjure up the idea that I will be a push-over? I am not the one hiding am I. I know you are scared of being knocked out in the ring. Who isn't ? Anyway you should be use to being unconcious, I mean I know you have been dropped on your head many times but I guess you had such a hard head it didn't knock you out. It did knock out all your common sense. Who would think I would be a piece of cake, a walk in the park. What the hell? You want to continue to think that way. It is fine by me cause that will just give me a whole lot more motive for knocking you out for the ten count. "Slick" Rick Richard you party all this week cause my party will come after I defeat you three misfit at Exodus:Existence for the Number One Contendership. "Slick" Rick Richards you actually think you are something in the SWF? You have beaten Tim Tewolde, we all know how retarded that he is and you defeat "Sick" Nick Jackson WOW! You deserve a cookie. So you haven't been tested the way I will test you Sunday Night. "Slick" Rick Richard Sunday Night will be the worst beating in your life. You better get ready for it
¤¤[ Greg The Perky T.G.I. Friday's Waiter ]¤¤ Hey I think that cab driver isn't looking lets hop in
¤¤[ Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs ]¤¤ Just a sec....Anyway "Slick" Rick Richards you will have to step up many levels to ever think of competing with me and I don't think you can.
ǧ[ Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs and Greg The Perky T.G.I. Friday's waiter sneak over to the cab driver who is reading the New York Post as Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs and Greg The Perky T.G.I. Friday's waiter just in and surprises the driver. ]ǧ
¤¤[ The Cab Driver ]¤¤ AGH.... Damnit
¤¤[ Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs ]¤¤ To the Marriot Hotel
ǧ[ The man looks at Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs ]ǧ
¤¤[ The Cab Driver ]¤¤ Excuse you, I am of duty.
ǧ[ The Cab Driver switches the sign off.. ]ǧ
¤¤[ Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs ]¤¤ I saw you turn the sign off.
¤¤[ The Cab Driver ]¤¤ Damnit, the Marriot it is.
¤¤[ Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs ]¤¤ Okay? Anyways let's talk about the most educated man that is in the damn match "Extreme" Jeff Markovich. The guy realizes that I am on another level. A guy that knows that I am the main factor in the entire match. A guy that knows to win the match he will have to use all his ability with help from the others to take me out. I mean he is from Canada. I knew I liked something about him. Even though he is from Montreal. But I just got to question the people Jeff hangs out with. I mean I didn't know you swung that way Just don't get that close to me in the match or you will wind up knocked out for a long long long time.
¤¤[ Greg The Perky T.G.I. Friday's Waiter ]¤¤Hey I liked that place
¤¤[ Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs ]¤¤ It figures so. Anyway it seems that his little buddy "Slick" Rick Richards, isn't taking me serious. You might want to talk to him before he winds up crippled. What the hell is his problem? But don't get me wrong Jeff you don't have any wrestling talent and that is why you will have the fate of the other two.I mean sure you could say that you won't have any trouble with Tim Tewolde but that is cause he is a damn retard who barely able to walk and talk at the same time much less knock anyone out. I ,on the other hand, am on another level then you two and if you continue to doubt you will not doubt any longer after Sunday Night as I become the Number One Contender for the Showtime Title. "Extreme" Jeff Markovich do you actually think that you are better me? Do you think you can actually hang with me. You can't actually think that can you. Are you that confuse. I mean come on you are talking about 110% Pure Canadian Excellence. While you well you just another average wrestler.. Come on you have no chance whatsoever against me. Why are you getting your hopes up. How many time do I have to tell you three before you get it through your head that you will only get disappointed. Get it through your thick heads
¤¤[ The Cab Driver ]¤¤ Here you are that will be 30.35
ǧ[ Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs and Greg The Perky T.G.I. Friday's Waiter exit after Chris pays the cab driver. They begin to step out of the taxi as the taxi speeds off as Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs begins to finish the promo ]ǧ
¤¤[ Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs ]¤¤ You know you would think that you three would learn to shut the hell up and realize you have no chance to ever beat me cause simply............
I AM THE BEST DAMN TECHNICAL WRESTLER -- PERIOD
ǧ[ Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs and Greg The Perky T.G.I. Friday's Waiter look around a little confuse ]ǧ
¤¤[ Greg The Perky T.G.I. Friday's Waiter ]¤¤ Ummmm........
¤¤[ Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs ]¤¤ WHAT THE HELL!? This doesn't look like the Marriot.
¤¤[ Greg The Perky T.G.I. Friday's Waiter ]¤¤ Excuse me ma'am where are we
¤¤[ The Lady ]¤¤ Umm you are in Buffalo
¤¤[ Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs ]¤¤ That asshole took us to BUFFALO!!!!!!!!
ǧ[ Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs takes a seat on a nearby bench and Greg The Perky T.G.I. Friday's Waiter turn around and begin to try to hail another cab. ]ǧ
ǧ[ Camera fades black ]ǧ
WILL CHRIS "THE MAIN EVENTER" STAGGS AND GREG THE PERKY T.G.I. FRIDAY'S WAITER EVER GET OUT OF BUFFALO
¤¤[ Chris "The Main Eventer" Staggs ]¤¤ GOD! I hope so.....
