[ Chris Naggs:] Chris, are you ready for your ladder match this week?

[ Chris Staggs:] Yep, I am going to play shoots n ladder all week to get ready.

[ Chris Naggs:] You have no concept of this match do you?

[ Chris Staggs:] It has instructions on how to play.

[ Chris Naggs:] Chris, sit back and listen to your narrator.

[ Chris Staggs:] FO SHO!

Fuck Pete Ebdon

Fuck Dynamic Dynamite

Fuck The Number One Contenders Match

Fuck The Propaganda

Whateva Fo Sho doesn't have a chance, right? I mean they are facing Propaganda again in a ladder match. After all it is known fact that lightening hits the same place twice. Bullshit, Propaganda did what half of tag teams do and win their first tag team match. So fucking what. The chances diminish once you move to the second match. Then you throw in the fact that you are facing the former SWF Tag Team Champions then you chances definitely go down. Then you take in the fact that one of you two can't even mid carders and your chances go down quicker than Melissa on the FWF locker room. Now Propaganda with your chance much slimmer, you have to retain your tag team titles by climbing a ladder. The task of retaining seems very steep. The ladder match is one of the most dangerous matches in the industry. In the this match you have to make your way rung by rung twenty feet in the air to grab the tag titles after you have went through a tough hard fought battle. The task is very difficult for the champions to retain their tag team titles. As the ladder can be a dangerous weapon that will be used during the match. You can be definitely certain of that. Now the ladder is in a way of a symbol. The ladder symbolizes the journey that you have taken to get to this point of wrestling for the SWF World Tag Team titles. Whateva Fo Sho  are on their ninth rung of their ladder while Propaganda is on a fucking step ladder. This is their second match. I mean fuck they have had one match and they are the tag team champions. Yet Whateva Fo Sho has to prove themselves to get a damn rematch with Propaganda. What the fuck is SWF thinking? You show Whateva Fo Sho no respect in the way you tell them they have to defeat a team that has never tagged together. So what is that saying? You don't have to do shit to have chance of getting a shot at the SWF Tag team titles? Well I guess the important thing is that Pete Ebdon and Dynamic Boy Wonder didn't serve much of a resistance for Chris Staggs and Tommy Grady. Now they must focus their attention to JD Lawson and Cordozer Stevenson and the ladder match this Sunday. They must be focused......aw fuck it. The main point is making sure that Chris Staggs and Tommy Grady know how the hell to win the match. That is the most important thing for them to know as the opponents will be second to that.

... JD Lawson ...

What is this JD? Are you starting to have doubt in the back of your mind? You must have doubt why else would you personally pull Tommy Grady aside and try to make him think that Chris Staggs is turning on him. First off Chris Staggs is too stupid to think of something so clever as to turn on Tommy Grady during a match. The second thing Tommy Grady knows that Chris Staggs will not turn on him.  You are trying to create a rift between Chris Staggs and Tommy Grady so it can equal that rift of you and Cordozer. Yeah your teamwork is null. Your communication is that full of threats.  Yet you are the SWF Tag Team champions. I guess the saying is true a blind squirrel finds a nut every once in a while. Now JD Lawson you may think that Chris Staggs is going to not want to face you ,because his dumbass thinks you are two are brothers. I am sure that Chris Naggs can trick him into facing you for SWF Tag Team titles. Now I know Chris Staggs is getting on your nerves. He may not getting inside your head ,but he is getting on your last nerve. He is making you see all red. You want to fucking kill his retarded ass right? You can't think of nothing more than you would like to do. Am I right? Of course I am, yet all this rage and anger built up in you has left obvious openings. See Chris Staggs is playing mind games with you and he doesn't even know it. See JD, you may think you can control your anger ,but no one can really control anger hence the phrase "Uncontrollable Anger". Chris Staggs has gotten inside your head accidentally. Now you can play it off like oh Chris Staggs is nothing to me. If that is so, why did you have to call Chris Staggs out and confront him. If he wasn't getting to you why would you care about the presents? If he wasn't affect you why do you pull Tommy Grady aside and try to get Chris Staggs and Tommy Grady to turn on each other. JD, you are making quite an effort if Chris Staggs doesn't mean anything to you.  JD Lawson with all that being said you can't say Chris Staggs is nothing more than another opponent. JD come on, break out the Missle Dictionary for your next promo. On the other hand don't. Chris Staggs isn't the lowly Shaun Stewart who thinks that he is unique for ripping off out of character shit. Better yet why don't you dust off the old JDTV and bring it back to Adrenaline this week. I don't care, you still have a defunct partner. This match you can't carry him. He has to do it by himself. He can't let you wrestle the whole match this time. I will save the Cordozer spill for a few moments now. JD, you know that Cordozer hasn't tapped his potential fuck he hasn't bought the tap yet. Now you want to come out here and confidently say that you are going to retain the titles. Chris Staggs and Tommy Grady gave you a tough match last time as you admitted after the match. Thus making this time much hard for you to win. See last time there was only two people in the ring at a time now this time around everyone is in the ring trying to get up that ladder to grab the SWF Tag Team titles. JD Lawson, your ego may come out and tell us that Chris Staggs and Tommy Grady are too stupid and too gullible to win the SWF Tag Team Titles ,but you really know that Chris Staggs and Tommy Grady can defeat you.

... Cordozer Stevenson ...

Yeah Cordozer you really are something. You proved our point last week when we said you had JD Lawson carry you. What have you done after you won the SWF World Tag Team titles? You lost to fucking Dude Job, I mean damn you can't win a singles title can you? You know what that tells everyone? You aren't worth shit. As JD Lawson put it you haven't tapped your potential. Damn the way it looks is you are tapping a keg that is empty. So come on Cordozer come at me with your NAACP meets GLAAD promo. What the fuck shadows of the rainbow? Anyway I am not going to come out here with some weak shit making fun of titles of your promos. Better yet let us talk about you. You claim to be a fixture in the federation. Please you haven't done shit. You are the fixture in the mid card slot more often than not. So you made one smart move in your SWF career by tagging along with JD Lawson. Big fucking deal. You still haven't done anything by yourself. So you went to the limit with Chris Staggs once. Your ass was lucky that the match was interfered by half of the fucking roster. Now Cordozer come on call Chris Staggs a joke. The fact is that he has won titles on his own. He hasn't needed people to help him pick up the victories for him. Yeah Cordozer come on you claim all this shit about being like the black man's hero or something then what do you do? You walk out and lose to fucking no name losers. Dude Who? What the fuck Cordozer? They have practically tried to place the SWF Overdrive title around your waist twice and you keep falling short every single time.  Cordozer now you claim that JD Lawson will carry you to victory yet again. Cordozer you need to step away from the television and quit watching the scrambled porn cause it is scrambling your mind. How the fuck do you think that is going to happen? You can't hide outside this time. You can't be saved from standing on the apron. Your ass will have to be in that ring fighting it out as it is two on two in the ring at all times. Now if you can't beat Jack Shit then I know that your ass couldn't beat Chris Staggs or Tommy Grady. Now don't give that shit about Chris Staggs's blown world title shots cause it is as old as your ego gimmick with no facts to back it up. So Cordozer come on with your oh so logical bullshit. You are fucking awesome dude. I mean I wished I could be just like you. Please give me a break. Your ass is going to cost your tag team the titles. You know it, I know it, Tommy Grady knows it, and the sad fact is JD Lawson knows it.  You can try and play it off ,but what can you say to save yourself? Chris Staggs and Tommy Grady have been on quite a roll excluding the foul up at Ammunition against JD Lawson. What have you done? You were outside watching the pin. After that you continue your fuck mediocre ways. I don't understand why they keep giving you the ball to run with. You keep double dribbling like Kobe Bryant on a fast break.

... Summing It Up ...

So now the time has come for JD Lawson to come out with his claims of Chris Staggs being an idiot. Really!? Get out here. You are telling me that Chris Staggs is dumb? Fuck off everyone knows that. Cordozer you can think JD Lawson has confidence in you ,but he does why must he keep threatening you till you actually win a match on your own? Whateva Fo Sho will regain their titles. JD Lawson is the industry. Well fuck the industry. That is.......

[ Chris Staggs:] FO SHO!!!

[ Chris Naggs:] So you ready for your match?

[ Chris Staggs:] FO SHO!!! I will got get my shoots n ladder board game right now.

[ Chris Naggs:] You didn't hear a word he said did you?

[ Chris Staggs:] Who?

[ Chris Naggs:] Nevermind.

( Camera opens up Chris Naggs walking into his own house as he walks in and lays down his keys and begins to the kitchen as he spots the answer machine. Chris Naggs walks over and looks down at the answer machine. Chris Naggs sighs. Chris Naggs talks to himself )

[ Chris Naggs:] Now who in the world would leave sixty two messages on my machine?

( Chris Naggs presses the play button )

( FIRST MESSAGE )

[ Chris Staggs:] BEEP Uh am I suppose to talk after the beep? Maybe I should wait till the next beep...............BEEP.

[ Chris Naggs:] Should have known it would be the retard....next message..

( SECOND MESSAGE )

[ Chris Staggs:] BEEP Okay I think I got this down. I am suppose to talk before the beep. The second beep knocks me off. Okay.......BEEP

[ Chris Naggs:] Why do I put up with this? Next message

( THIRD MESSAGE )

[ Chris Staggs:] BEEP Hey it's Chris Staggs....well you know that don't you. I was wondering if I could order this pay per view. Call me back. BEEP

[ Chris Naggs:] Why would he ask me that? 59 messages left

( FOURTH MESSAGE )

[ Chris Staggs:] BEEP Hey it's me, you haven't called me back yet. So I went ahead and ordered it. Bye. BEEP

[ Chris Naggs:] What was the point of that message. Sheesh I hope he didn't do all these messages.

( FIFTH MESSAGE )

[ Chris Staggs:] BEEP Hey Chris, you know that movie I ordered. I think I ordered the wrong one. I wanted to watch Tuck Everlasting. I don't think this is it. Naked people wrestling all over the place in this one. BEEP

[ Chris Naggs:] Damn retard ordered a porno. I should be done by the time my flight leaves.

( FIFTH MESSAGE )

[ Chris Staggs:] BEEP Hey Chris, I did order the wrong movie. This movie is called Fuck Everlasting. BEEP

[ Chris Naggs:] This message was senseless.

( Chris Staggs pulls up a chair and takes a seat. )

( SIXTH MESSAGE )

[ Chris Staggs:] BEEP Chris, can I feed our dog chocolate cake? BEEP.

[ Chris Naggs:] Our dog?

( SEVENTH MESSAGE )

[ Chris Staggs:] BEEP That wasn't our dog I found out. He didn't much like the cake it appears. BEEP.

[ Chris Naggs:] Well so far he has killed a dog while I was gone..

( EIGHTH MESSAGE )

[ Chris Staggs:] BEEP Umm the dog just got sick all over the floor. Do I clean it up? BEEP

[ Chris Naggs:] Yeah dumbass.

( NINTH MESSAGE )

[ Chris Staggs:] BEEP Why haven't you called me back? I cleaned up the doggie throw up. It was starting to stink up the place. BEEP

[ Chris Naggs:] I am never leaving this guy alone again.

( TENTH MESSAGE )

[ Chris Staggs:] BEEP Since you are not here, do I have to go to bed now? BEEP

[ Chris Naggs:] I am giving him the wrong number next time.

( ELEVENTH MESSAGE )

[ Chris Staggs:] BEEP Well you haven't called so I am staying up. Smurfs and Cookies here I come!!! BEEP

[ Chris Naggs:] This guy is annoying.

... Next 49 Messages Of Nonsense ...

[ Chris Naggs:] Finally TWO MESSAGES LEFT!!!!

( SIXTY FIRST MESSAGE )

[ Chris Staggs:] BEEP Dude I think someone is watching me outside my window. BEEP

[ Chris Naggs:] I hope he kills his retarded ass. FINALLY LAST MESSAGE!!!

( SIXTY SECOND MESSAGE )

[ Chris Staggs:] BEEP That last message was wrong. The person watching me was just my reflection silly me. So what's new? BEEP

[ Chris Naggs:] I have survived sixty two idiotic messages. I think I can conquer anything. Now I can finally relax.

( Chris Naggs stands up and walks over to the couch and takes a seat. He grabs the remote and turns on the television. He begins to watch television as just then...)

( RING RING )

( Chris Naggs sighs as he answers the phone. )

[ Chris Naggs:] Hello?

[ Chris Staggs:] Hey Chris.

[ Chris Naggs:] AGHHHHHHHHHHHHH

( Chris Naggs drops the phone and runs away screaming. )

[ Chris Staggs:] Chris? Chris? Chris?

( Chris Naggs finally calms down walks back as picks up the phone )

[ Chris Naggs:] Hello?

[ Chris Staggs:] Are you okay?

[ Chris Naggs:] No.

[ Chris Staggs:] You stay up eating cookies and watching Smurf reruns too?

[ Chris Naggs:] No.

[ Chris Staggs:] That is what I did.

[ Chris Naggs:] I know. You call me with a damn minute by minute update.

[ Chris Staggs:] I got bored.

[ Chris Naggs:] Call Tommy.

[ Chris Staggs:] Aaron was making him work out all week.

[ Chris Naggs:] Why don't you go workout in the gym?

[ Chris Staggs:] I don't know a Jim.

[ Chris Naggs:] Forget it.

[ Chris Staggs:] FO SHO!

[ Chris Naggs:] Why did you call me?

[ Chris Staggs:] Can I go out today?

[ Chris Naggs:] Sure. You can't call me then.

[ Chris Staggs:] FO SHO! BYE!!!

[ Chris Naggs:] Yeah right.

( Chris Naggs hangs up the phone and walks in the kitchen he takes a bottle of Aspirin and takes a couple of pills and pops them in as he runs to his couch and begins watching television. )

( END PROMO )