[ Chris Staggs:] Where is Mic Steal?

[ Chris Naggs:] You have a new narrator.

[ Chris Staggs:] But, where is he?

Probably taking some more English classes...

[ Chris Staggs:] SCHOOL IS COOL!

 Sure it is kid.....Though accept me, I am your new disgruntled narrator...No Logos needed

Fuck The Higher Ups

Fuck the Industry

Fuck Propaganda

Fuck Pay Per Views

Why even give Chris Staggs title shots on the pay per views. Just leave him off the fucking card. I mean all he does is become a jobber when pay per view time rolls around. It has been eight months since he came back from his one month stay at the funny farm. He has lost at least one match in every pay per view since. I mean the injustice in the SWF has for passed the level of bearable. Chris Staggs has carried every feud with maybe the exception of Hen who contributed to half of the feud. Yet the SWF bookers and higher ups are sending a message to stay in your locker rooms and wait for the pay per view. Hell, half ass it during the month. They don't care. You will still get your title shots. The SWF is completely fucked up with who they grant title shots to. So now what is Chris Staggs to do? Does he continue to help the SWF with ratings or does he fall in line with the rest and stay in his locker room? Does he half ass it till the pay per view? You know Chris Staggs will continue to bring the ratings due to the simple fact that he doesn't know any better. I guess it is funny that the SWF treats loyalty like complete shit and wonders why no one stays longer than a couple of months. Chris Staggs has given the SWF his time, sweat, blood, and tears. How do they repay him? They make him the pay per view main event jobber. Way to treat loyalty. No wonder why Jason Rothchild left, no wonder why Pete Ebdon left for seven months. Sure you could make the point that Chris Staggs may not be able to get the job done. Yet you are telling me that over eight months Chris Staggs has won one or two pay per view matches? That isn't bad luck, that isn't choking, that is just plain fucked up. You are telling me that Strick Carrington, a guy who Chris Staggs defeated for his only SWF World Title, can defeat Aaron Awesome and Chris Staggs can't? Enough about that right now I guess. I guess I better start focusing on Chris Staggs's opponent for this week's Adrenaline. Which Chris Staggs will win cause it is Adrenaline. Chris Staggs is the higher ups puppet to draw ratings for the pay per view. SWF you take advantage of Chris Staggs's intelligence or lack thereof for financial gain. Things will change. I am here to make sure that will happen.

 ...Marquis Soriano...

So Chris Staggs is suppose to take on this rookie sensation sorry Shaun Stewart, but this rookie has beaten names like Cordozer Stevenson...I guess that is a name. Then he defeats Odyssey at the pay per view. How does Chris Staggs approach this match after a loss? Then again what the hell am I talking about? Chris Staggs has won matches after pay per view losses before why is this time any different? So anyway Marquis you must be gaining confidence. After all you did beat two guys with names. Though that is all they are...names. Sure Cordozer is one half of the tag team champions ,but we all know why...two initials J-D. Then again Cordozer is known to half ass it during the month till pay per view time rolls around and that is when you faced him wasn't it? So what am I telling you? Simply that your victory was a hollow victory. Oh but wait you did beat a former FWF superstar Odyssey. Please Odyssey is nothing more than a name too, he hasn't been focused on a match since he has arrived in the SWF. Hell I don't even know why he wants to stay employed in the SWF. So you defeated a half-hearted opponent who didn't care whether he won or lost. You basically defeated half a man. So Marquis your first two victories may look good on paper ,but in reality that is what they are... paper wins. They help you get a little fan club started like you got going backstage ,but that is about it till you face a name that actually will try. Then the so called shit hits the fan for you. Now you face a man who may not be able to battle wits with you ,but he will be able to battle  his talent and heart with you. Yeah I know it is corny to say heart ,but when you are able to get back up after losing seven SWF World Title Shots and your IQ is lower than a rock, you have to have something to rely on and heart is that. Now Marquis I know little about you, for the simple fact that you have been in the SWF for a mere couple of weeks. Though you are at least showing up. That counts for something, while this week you will have to do more than show up. This week your opponent won't half ass it nor will he half heartedly try. Chris Staggs doesn't know how to not go hard. Chris Staggs doesn't know how to give up. Sure I know this is the typical kayfabe spill ,but every word I speak of is true. So Marquis you want to try and end the streak that Chris Staggs has compiled over the last three months' Adrenaline? You think some rookie is going to up end that streak? Please don't think I am doubting your ability ,but if Jeff Harris, the SWF World Champion, couldn't defeat Chris Staggs in a steel cage what makes you think you have a shot? Please rook don't fill your head with grand dreams because they will be shattered within minutes. So now what are you going to bring to the table? The typical spill about Chris Staggs being an idiot? It's been done to death. Are you going to quote and break down every fucking thing I say? Apparently there is a trend starting doing that you might want to jump aboard the bandwagon. Are you going to point out the many title shots I have blown? There is no title on the line to blow in this match why bring it up? You have either two choices...fall in line with the rest of the roster or do the usual and come with something original to say. It been three months and no one has came up with anything new. Why would you break the trend? I mean apparently no one can come up with any other insults. It is always the same song and dance ,but I am tired of dancing and I am sick of this song.

... SWF Tag Team Titles ...

Yeah Propaganda was the first tag team to defeat Whateva Fo Sho. I know you are going to flaunt the victory in front of the world. Though Cordozer did take away from your victory when I quote "Chris Staggs and Tommy Grady are the worst tag team champions." So you defeated the worst champions. Congrats that must have been a well earned victory. Though now you were able to do what seven other team weren't able to do. So congrats I guess. Though now I am not going to stand here and make excuses. I mean sure Chris Staggs was in a handicap match for more than ten minutes while his tag partner laid outside unconscious. I don't need to tell you that you already knew that. I will not make the point that it took not one but two ALGOPHOBIAs to finally pin Chris Staggs for the three count, JD. I don't feel the urge to point out the fact that the illegal man pinned Chris Staggs to pick up the victory. No I am above all that. I don't need to make excuses for Chris Staggs and Tommy Grady. They were defeated. You decide if it was a real legit victory or not. Though remember it is only a matter of time till Chris Staggs and Tommy Grady get a rematch. After all they are the number one contenders for the titles. They will receive another shot. So can you get away with another victory? I know your answer ,but really can you have all the things fall into place for you to retain the titles?  

... Summing It Up ...

What do I really need to sum up? The SWF treats loyalty like shit, Chris Staggs's opponent will probably come at him with the same tired routine and congrats on Propaganda for winning the tag team titles. What else is their to sum up?  Oh and now Chris Staggs has a narrator that won't take any of this shit off these cheap shot artists.  Chris Staggs has a narrator that is ready to fucking take care of business. I am the narrator that can get him the push to finally win the SWF World Title. Yeah laugh now while you still can.

[ Chris Naggs:] I like him.

[ Chris Staggs:] He seems mean to me.

Yeah whateva..

[ Chris Staggs:] FO SHO!

Right kid.

( Camera opens up with Chris Staggs looking depressed a bit as he has come off from Sunday from losing his SWF World Tag Team Titles. Chris Staggs walks over around kicking his feet along a bit. Chris Staggs sighs a bit as Chris Naggs walks into the room and sees Chris Staggs and walks up to him )

[ Chris Naggs:] What is the matter? You still sad that you lost.

[ Chris Staggs:] Lost what?

[ Chris Naggs:] The SWF Tag Team Belts

[ Chris Staggs:] Oh no, the belts never held up my pants anyway.

[ Chris Naggs:] But--nevermind.

[ Chris Staggs:] FO SHO!

[ Chris Naggs:] What is the problem then. Why are you sad?

[ Chris Staggs:] I can't do anything.

[ Chris Naggs:] Why do you say that?

[ Chris Staggs:] I'm broke.

[ Chris Naggs:] Well you can always ask me for money.

[ Chris Staggs:] But you never give me enough to get it.

[ Chris Naggs:] What do you want to by.

[ Chris Staggs:] If I tell you, then you won't give me the money.

[ Chris Naggs:] Well I am not going to give it to you.

[ Chris Staggs:] FINE!

( Just then on television, the news is on. )

[ Newscaster:] Well, Mrs. Jones had quite a surprise today as she was the winner of the Jackpot Lottery. She has won twenty million dollars.

( Chris Staggs hears this and begins to smile )

[ Chris Staggs:] I have an idea.

[ Chris Naggs:] You are not going to try and win the lottery are you?

[ Chris Staggs:] That works too.

[ Chris Naggs:] Wait what was your idea?

[ Chris Staggs:] I was going to change my name to Mrs. Jones and hope they give me the money ,but your idea is better.

( Chris Staggs starts to leave the room as Chris Staggs just looks at Chris Staggs in bewilderment. )

[ Chris Staggs:] Chris let's go to the Lotto Store and get the money.

[ Chris Naggs:] Um first we have to go to a gas station where they sell tickets. Then you pick five numbers to give. Then you number have to give it to the cashier. The cashier then gives you the ticket. They hold drawings three times a week. You watch and see if they all match. If they do then you get the money. You got that?

( Chris Staggs gives Chris Naggs a blank stare. )

[ Chris Naggs:] Chris?

[ Chris Staggs:] Um...lets go where I can get the money.

[ Chris Naggs:] You didn't understand a word I said.

[ Chris Staggs:] Uh HUH!

[ Chris Naggs:] What did I say.

"Um first we have to go to a gas station where they sell tickets. Then you pick five numbers to give. Then you number have to give it to the cashier. The cashier then gives you the ticket. They hold drawings three times a week. You watch and see if they all match. If they do then you get the money. You got that ?"

[ Chris Naggs:] How did you do that?

[ Chris Staggs:] Quoting RULES!!!

[ Chris Naggs:] Right...

[ Chris Staggs:] So.......MONEY MONEY MONEY!!!!!

[ Chris Naggs:] I should have never suggested this.

[ Chris Staggs:] You don't want money?

[ Chris Naggs:] Yes...

[ Chris Staggs:] Yes you don't want  or yes you do want?

[ Chris Naggs:] I want money.

[ Chris Staggs:] Maybe you can try and get money too.

[ Chris Naggs:] Uh right.

[ Chris Staggs:] So what are we waiting on?

[ Chris Naggs:] You want to go now?

[ Chris Staggs:] FO SHO!!

[ Chris Naggs:] Ugh, do you have five numbers picked out?

[ Chris Staggs:] FO SHO!!

[ Chris Naggs:] May I ask what they are?

[ Chris Staggs:] And let you win my money? NEVAH!

[ Chris Naggs:] *sighs*

[ Chris Staggs:] I am telling ya, you need to get that breathing checked out...Sheesh.

( Chris Staggs leaves the room as Chris Naggs just shakes his head as he calls Chris. )

[ Chris Naggs:] CHRIS!!

( Chris Staggs pops his head back in the door )

[ Chris Staggs:] What?

[ Chris Naggs:] Put on some shoes on..

( Chris Staggs looks down )

[ Chris Staggs:] FO SHO!

( Chris Staggs runs into the bedroom to put on his shoes )

... Confession Booth ...

( Chris Staggs is seen sitting in a seat surrounded by what appears to be a county fair type surroundings. Chris Staggs just smiles toward the camera as people pass by and look at him strangely. Chris Staggs just waves as he fixes the Sony camcorder and begins to speak )

[ Chris Staggs:] Money!!! WOOOO!!!! I am going to win money!!!!! I am going to be able to by the lastest and most advanced super soaker. This one shoots over 200 yards. It is like WHOOSH!!! I am look HAHAHA You got sprayed by my super soaker. They will be like that is not cool. Then I would be like I am too cool. I got this new super soaker that will spray you. Then they will say I am cool. They will be scared of getting wet again. You know. Dude I am going to put honey in it so not only will you get wet but you will get sticky. Then you will be like ewwwww. I will be like yeah. Boy I can't wait to win the lottery to get the super soaker. I mean wouldn't that be cool. I could the Super Soaker KING OF THE SWF!! WOOOOO!!!! FO SHO!!! Now they say I have a match. Which I know isn't true cause Chris won't allow me to play with fire. He said he didn't want to pay for a hotel. Which I don't understand what meant. Oh well...wait they mean a wrestling match. Oh well win or lose....I hope I get my super soaker.

( Just then a man walks up )

[ Man:] What kinda booth is this?

[ Chris Staggs:] Confession Booth.

[ Man:] Cool how much?

[ Chris Staggs:] Free.

[ Man:] Sounds like a good price.

[ Chris Staggs:] FO SHO!

( Chris Staggs starts to leave as the man sits down and begins to talk about how his father abused him by forcing him to watch over 99 Jeff Harris and 100 JD Lawson promos. )

( TO BE CONTINUED...)