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Insane Quotes... Instead of burning a guy at the stake,
what about burning him at the STILTS? It probably lasts longer, plus it moves
around. ( Funny isn't it...you look around the federation at
promos and you see all these egos. You have people claiming their greatness. I
mean some have a legit claim at becoming great ,but then you have others. The
ones that come out after a loss and blame each other. They then turn and say
forget that loss. Well if they keep forgetting losses then they will never
remember the SWF. Yeah I am talking about the Hebrew Homies. They need have
their balls drop and become some men. That will never happen though. Yet the cut
promos about their greatness. I have to call BULLSHIT on that. Then we have
other people who are pulling a Jason Rothchild and claiming they made the SWF.
Yeah I am talking to you Aaron Andrews. You want to sit there and say you made
the SWF the last couple of months. When you didn't do shit except kiss ass to
get the title. Hell you didn't even win the title. You were given the title
after you lose to Jason Rothchild. Give me a fucking break A2. I am have had it
with your ego. You need an ego check and I think I going to give you one right
now. Aaron Andrews so you were the federation the last couple of months. Funny I
don't remember you doing shit. Yeah you defeated Chris Staggs though simply
holding one victory with a stacked deck doesn't make you the federation. No
Aaron Andrews, to be the federation you have to do something more than sit there
and say "Look I am great, I am champ" You have to actually provide something to
the feud. Hell the Chris Staggs/Aaron Andrews feud was more of Chris Staggs
taking on Chris Carey. Aaron Andrews you didn't contribute nothing to the feud.
Then after you win the stacked deck victory, you have the nerve to say the feud
was a waste of your time. WHAT THE FUCK!? Waste of your time? You didn't do shit
except be me up for one show. You weren't the federation the last three months.
You were just the champion. You were the top guy and nothing more. Chris Staggs
was the federation that last couple of months. He was the one that made the
Sinners & Saints match appealing. He was the one that drove the damn feud. So
for you to come out and say you were the federation is nothing more than your
ego speaking again. You better get it back in check. I know you are wondering
why this came out of left field. Well it really hasn't, its been building up for
a couple of months and your last promo finally sent me over the edge. I though
maybe you would change last month but the main event for Sudden Immortality was
most likely the biggest disappointment in the SWF history. You were nothing as a
champion. You added nothing to the SWF. You were dead weight as World Champion.
I am glad that Strick Carrington finally took you off your throne. Now Aaron
Andrews you haven't done shit....you never will do shit. Face it feuding with
you is like feuding with a wet paper bag. Fuck off. Jackrabbit Do you ever remember what you say? I
mean really Jackrabbit do you ever remember what you say from one promo to the
next? If you did you would have remember you saying that Chris Staggs is
embarking on Legendary Status. Now how am I suppose to take that? That is
suppose to insult on my dumbness? Well I guess Chris Staggs and I must be dumb
cause I don't get that insult. Though I know that is not enough of a statement
to base my opinion that you are kissing his ass. But the other statement you
made in your last promo was arguing who was the dumbest. Jackrabbit I didn't
have much to work with. Now Jackrabbit before you open your mouth again you
might want to watch you last promo over that way you don't contradict yourself.
Now let's talk about who you said that you went toe to toe with in the
W3....First you talk about Pete Ebdon...please the way to beat him is to have
A.D.D. that way you miss have the shit he repeats. Next you talk about Jason
Sensation...some consider him a legend...HAHAHAHAHAHA. What people consider him
a legend? The same people that are competing in the Special Olympics with Chris
Staggs? I mean fuck Jason Sensation was the best you could come up with.
Jackrabbit Chris Staggs has gone against the best of them. He has more title
shots than you have would ever dream of. Sure he hasn't won many of them but he
has climbed the mountain. So don't talk about how you can brawl with the best of
them, if your best is Pete Ebdon and Jason Sensation. Jackrabbit come this
Sunday Night Adrenaline while you are dreaming of having your little tag team be
the first team inducted into the Hall Of Fame, Whateva Fo Sho will be handing
your first loss as a tag team in the SWF. Face it Jackrabbit you are facing the
best and you don't have what it takes to become the best. So Jackrabbit why
don't you and little buddy just except defeat that way you are not hurt when you
realize that you have lost to the future SWF Tag Team Champions. If you play
your cards right we might grant you a shot after the pay per view. Oh and
Jackrabbit they are not underestimating you. They are simply stating what many
in around the SWF are thinking. So Jackrabbit you are not going to pull
the upset, you are not going to be the underdog in this match. You are simply
going to witness the next Tag Team Champions. Kryptonite Umm damn you don't like to talk about
your opponents much do you? I mean I went to the bathroom for a minute and came
back and you were done with your trash talking. I understand why it was short,
you can't make that weak shit long. You are ten times the wrestler than Chris
Staggs....yeah very believable. You haven't done shit in the W3 nor the SWF. You
are thirty times good looking...okay? What does that have to do with this match?
This is a swimsuit showdown is it? Kryptonite, so Chris Staggs is suppose to be
prepared for a whole new Kryptonite. Well you better start changing into him
cause from where I sit you are still the horrible weak link known as Kryptonite.
You have done anything in your promos to make me say otherwise. You defeated
David Dunn for Christ Sakes. That is like collecting two hundred dollars every
time you pass go. Everyone defeats him. He is a joke of a wrestler. He is even
more of a joke as an enforcer. So Kryptonite you better hope that you can change
into that new Kryptonite before tomorrow night or you will take yet another loss
from Chris Staggs. Damn Kryptonite you are doing a horrible job in trying to be
the next Jason Rothchild. Kryptonite, simply you don't have what it takes to
beat me. The bad thing is that you are not admitting it to yourself. Come one
just do it and the loss will seems less crushing. Summing It Up The time draws near as Club 403 tries to defeat
Whateva Fo Sho. They can think that Chris Staggs and Tommy Grady are taking them
lightly. They may and they may not all I know is your chance of winning is about
as much chance that Puffy Daddy not appearing any of Bad Boy's arties videos.
Heh, so I guess that means you have no chance. ( Camera fades in as we see Chris Staggs, Chris
Naggs, Tommy Grady, Aaron Everage, and Winslow walking in the parking toward the
stadium where the Special Olympics are being held. Chris Staggs has on a track
uniform as the parking lot is surrounded in short buses. They walk toward the
entrance as they are stopped by the guards ) [ Guard:] Name
please... [ Chris Staggs:] HI I'M CHRIS STAGGS [ Guard:] Okay you
may go in... ( Chris Staggs walks in as everyone else starts to
follow him as the guard stops them. ) [ Guard:] Only two
are limited to be on the field. [ Chris Staggs:] Tommy and Winslow!!!!! ( Tommy Grady and Winslow walk by and follow Chris
Staggs into the stadium. ) [ Chris Staggs:] I'm ready to kick some retard
ass!!!! [ Tommy Grady:] Fo
definite Sho! [ Chris Staggs:] FO SHO!!! [ Winslow:] You two
some crazy ass crackers... [ Chris Staggs:] There is no time for food
Winslow...its time to win the gold!!! ( Chris Staggs walks over to the middle of the field
as he walks over to the section of the field labeled USA. ) [ Tommy Grady:]
Dude....look at the team. ( Chris Staggs looks it over ) [ Chris Staggs:] Damn they look uh uh uh [ Tommy Grady:]
Retarded? [ Chris Staggs:] FO SHO!!! [ Winslow:] This is
the Special-a Olympic-a foo! [ Chris Staggs:] I know, Tommy and I are the old
special ones here [ Tommy Grady:] Fo
definite Sho! [ Chris Staggs:] Hmm I guess I should meet the
team. [ Tommy Grady:]
Whateva.... [ Chris Staggs:] FO SHO! ( Chris Staggs and Tommy Grady walk over to this kid
with Down Syndrome. ) [ Chris Staggs:] Hi I am your teammate!!! [ Down Syndrome Teammate:]
Dah Bah I Dah Bah BOBBY! [ Chris Staggs:] Hi Dah Bah Bobby. What event
are you doing? ( The Down Syndrome Teammate looks down at the
ground and says nothing ) [ Chris Staggs:] Hey! WHAT EVENT ARE YOU IN!!! ( The Down Syndrome Teammate looks down at the
ground and says nothing sill. Chris Staggs taps him on the shoulder. The Down
Syndrome Teammate jumps. ) [ Down Syndrome Teammate:]
AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! ( Chris Staggs jumps back ) [ Chris Staggs:] AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH [ Down Syndrome Teammate:]
AGHHHHHHHHH [ Chris Staggs:] Hmmm....lets talk to another
teammate. He seems a little jumpy plus he looks he might be related to Chris
Carey. [ Tommy Grady:] FO
SHO!! ( Chris Staggs and Tommy Grady walks over to a guy
with
Tourette's Syndrome. ) [ Chris Staggs:] Hi! [ Tourette's Syndrome Teammate:]
Hi FUCK SHIT COCK SUCKER LICK CUNT!!! [ Chris Staggs:] David Dunn? [ Tourette's Syndrome Teammate:]
No I am FUCKING DILDO DOUCHE BAG Harvey.... [ Chris Staggs:] Fucking Dildo....I didn't catch
the rest. Oh well doesn't matter anyway what event are you in? [ Tourette's Syndrome Teammate:]
I am in the ASS LICKER 440. [ Tommy Grady:]
Dude that is gross... [ Chris Staggs:] Yeah....Definitely gross. [ Tourette's Syndrome Teammate:]
NO!! I AM IN THE COCK SUCKER 400 [ Chris Staggs:] Umm....okay? [ Tommy Grady:]
Dude that is even worse!!! [ Chris Staggs:] You are a freak I am not
talking to you anymore. ( Chris Staggs and Tommy Grady walk over toward a
Mental Retardation Teammate. ) [ Chris Staggs:] Hi I am Chris Staggs. [ Mental Retardation Teammate:]
Duh Dar Tah Duh Dar [ Tommy Grady:]
Dude is he making fun of you? [ Chris Staggs:] Umm I don't know. [ Mental Retardation Teammate:]
Duh Dar Tah Duh Dar [ Chris Staggs:] SHUT UP!!! [ Mental Retardation Teammate:]
Duh Dar Tah Duh Dar ( Chris Staggs sticks his fingers in his ears ) [ Chris Staggs:] LALALALALALALA I'M NOT
LISTENING TO YOU!!! LALALALALALA I'M NOT LISTENING TO YOU!!!! [ Tommy Grady:] Hey
Chris... [ Chris Staggs:] LALALALALALALA I'M NOT
LISTENING TO YOU!!! LALALALALALA I'M NOT LISTENING TO YOU!!!! [ Tommy Grady:] HEY
CHRIS!!! ( Tommy nudges him as Chris Staggs takes his fingers
out of his ears ) [ Chris Staggs:] Huh? [ Tommy Grady:]
What event are you in? [ Chris Staggs:] Wrestling!!! [ Tommy Grady:]
They just called every to report to the first building for the event.. [ Chris Staggs:] FO SHO!!! ( Chris Staggs and Tommy Grady along with Winslow
walk toward the building. They walks toward the building. They enter the
building as we see a the mat in the middle of the floor. Chris Staggs and Tommy
Grady look at each other. ) [ Chris Staggs & Tommy Grady:] Where's the ring? [ Winslow:] The mat
is it. [ Tommy Grady:]
Whateva... [ Chris Staggs:] FO SHO!!! [ ANNOUNCEMENT:] Chris Staggs report to the
mat.... [ Chris Staggs:] DAT'S ME!!! ( Chris Staggs walks over to the mat as deaf and
blind kid walks up against him. ) [ The Ref:] Okay
guys make this a clean match. [ Chris Staggs:] FO SHO!!!! ( The match starts as they circle each other as all
of a sudden Chris Staggs kicks the Blind Deaf Kid in the stomach as the ref
breaks it up. ) [ The Ref:] Illegal
Move point to Jimmy! [ Chris Staggs:] That was legal!!!! ( The ref shakes his head no as they begin again as
Chris Staggs takes him the kid down. All of a sudden the blind deaf kid flips
puts Chris Staggs in a leg lock. Chris Staggs sits up and rakes the eyes of the
blind guy. Okay? That was a dumb move...) [ Chris Staggs:] Shut up! [ Tommy Grady:]
HEY!! CHRIS TAG ME!!!!! ( Chris Staggs tags in Tommy Grady who jumps on top
of the kid and begins stomping around on him. The blind deaf kid is out in the
middle of the mat. ) [ Chris Staggs:] Tag me back!!! ( Tommy Grady tags him back in as they wait. The kid
stands up DEGRADING JOB!!! Chris Staggs covers the kid. The ref is waving his
hands. ) [ The Ref:]
DISQUALIFIED!!!! [ Chris Staggs:] I WON BY DQ!!! WOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
[ Tommy Grady:]
WOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!! [ The Ref:] NO YOU
TWO ARE DISQUALIFIED AND BANNED FROM THE SPECIAL OLYMPICS FOREVER!! [ Chris Staggs:] We won fair and square. It
wasn't our fault that he didn't have tag partner!!! [ Tommy Grady:]
YEAH!!! [ The Ref:] Guards
escorts these two to the short bus. ( Two guards grab Chris Staggs and Tommy Grady and
escort them to the short bus. They are placed in the short bus. ) [ Chris Staggs:] Lets get out of here. [ Tommy Grady:]
Whateva.... [ Chris Staggs:] FO SHO!!!! ( Chris Staggs and Tommy Grady drive off in the
short bus as the guards chase after them. ) ( END PROMO ) THIS WEEK'S MORAL: Any idiots can beat some
retards... |
