| Why doesn't the glue in the bottle dry up? If Luke took a bath, would the water be lukewarm? If an anarchist group attained political power, would they by principle have to dissolve their own government? If you decide that you're indecisive, which one are you? Why is it we have the weight of the world on our shoulders but have to get it off our chests? Why do they call it a RUNNING BACK when he is running forward? How come no matter what color the liquid is the froth is always white? Why do british people never sound british when they sing? Why do they call it "head over heels in love" if our head is always over our heels? Can a hearse driver drive in the carpool lane? Why is the name of the phobia for the frear of long words hippoptomonstrosesquippedaliophobia? Why is it called a TV set when theres only one? If IHOP stands for international House Of Pancakes how come you only see it in teh US? If its zero degrees outside today and its supposed to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold is it going to be? How did the headless horseman know where he was going? Why do they call it an escalator if it takes you down? Why is it that chickens are poultry but chicken eggs are dairy? Why is it called foodball when you hardly use your feet? What do u say when god sneezes? Do cows drink milk? Can i guy named nick have a 'nick'name? If a person owns a piece of land do they own it all the way down to the core of the earth? What is a male ladybug called? Why is it that its called Alcoholics Anonymous, but the first thing you do is stand up and say, "my name is bob and i'm an alcoholic? If you mated a bulldog and a shitzu would u call it a bullshit? Why do they put for indoor or outdoor use only on christmas lights? Why is grape nuts cereal called that when it contains neither grapes nor nuts? If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares why is there a song about him? Do they have the word dictionary in the dictionary? What do you call a female daddy long legs? Why can't women put on mascara with their mouth closed? Why is it called a drive through if you have to stop? Why is it that rain drops but snow falls? Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour? Who was teh first person to look at a cow and say, "i think i'll squeeze these dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out? What was teh best thing before sliced bread? If the professor on Gilligans island can build a radio out of a coconut why cant he fix a hole in a boat? Why is cargo transported by ship but a shipment is trasported by car? Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but people dont point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is? If practice makes perfect, and nobodys perfect, why practice? Why do they call it a blacklight when its really purple? Why do they call it "getting your dog fixed" if afterwards it doesn't work anymore? Why do we leave expensive cars in the driveway, when we keep worthless junk in the garage? Why do they call it taking a dump? Shouldn't it be called leaving a dump? What if the hokey-pokey realy is what its all about? Where in the nursery rhyme does it say that humpty dumpty is an egg? If quizzes are quizzical then what are tests? Why do they sterilize needles for lethal injections? Why do banks leave the door wide open but the pens chained to the counter? If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made from? Why is it that when you tell a person that theres over a million starts in the universe they believe you, but if someone tells them theres wet paint somewhere they have to touch it to make sure? If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons? If you're in hell and are mad at someone, where do you tell them to go? Why does Donald Duck wear a towl when he comes out of the shower, when he doesn't usually wear any pants?? If you take an oriental person and spin him around a few times does he become disoriented? Why do they call it an asteroid when its outside the hemisphere but call it a hemorrhoid when its in your ass? Did you ever notice when you blow in a dogs face he gets mad at you.. but when you take him in a car he sticks his head out the window? Do infants enjoy infancey as much as adults enjoy adultery? Do lipton employees take coffee breaks? Do one legged ducks swim in circles? How come superman could stop bullets with his chest, but always ducked when someone threw a gun at him? How come you press harder on the remote control when you know the battery is dead? How fast do you have to go to keep up with the sun so you're never in darkness? How is it possible to have a civil war? If a stealth bomber crashers in a forest, will it make a sound? If a synchronized swimmer drowns, does her partner also have to drown? If god dropped acid, would he see people? How much deeper would the ocean be if sponges didn't grow in it? If 7-11 is open 24 hours a day 365 days a year.. why are there locks on the doors? If you werer traveling at the speed of sound and you trunedurned on your radio would you be ble to hear it? If a turtle doesn't have a shell is he homeless or naked? If all those psychics know the winning lottery numbers, why are they still working? If knees were backwards what would chairs look like? If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular? If nothing ever sticks to TEFLON, how do they make TEFLON stick to the pan? If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill herself is it considered a hostage situation? If the #2 pencil is the most popular, why is it still #2? If the cops arrest a mime, do they have to tell him he has the right to remain silent? If the energizer bunny attacks someone , is he charged with battery? If the folks at the pschic hotlines were really psychic, wouldn't they call you first? If you can't drink and drive, why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor, and why do bars have parking lots? If you have a friend who works for the Psychic Friends Network, should you plan a surprise birthday party for them? If you have an open mind why dont your brains fall out? If you have your finger touching the rearview mirror that says "objects are closer than they appear" how is that possible? If you spend your day doing nothing, how do you know when you're done? If you take a shower, where do you put it? If you throw a cat out a car window does it become kitty litter? If your cross eyed and have dyslexia can you read correctly? If youre traveling at the speed of light and you turn your headlights on what happens? Should vegetarians eat animal crackers? There are 24 hours in a day, and 24 beers in a case. Coincidence? What did we do before the Law of Gravity was passed? What do sheep count when they can't sleep? What hair color do they put on the drivers license of a bald man? What is another word for "thesaurus"? What is the speed of dark? What should you do when you see an endangered animal that is eating an endangered plant? When blind people go to the bathroom how do they know when they are done wiping there ass? When people lose weight, where does it go? When vultures are on their deathbed, are they ever tempted to eat themselves? When you choke a smurf, what color does it turn? Whose cruel idea was it for the word "lisp" to have an "s"in it? WHy are citarettes sold in gas stations when smoking is prohibited there? Why are there flotation devices under plane seats instead of parachutes? Are there interstate highways in hawaii? Why are we afraid of falling? Shouldn't we be afraid of the sudden stop? Why aren't there bullet proof pants? If your feet smell and your nose runs, are you built upside down? Why do they call them apartments when they are all stuck together? Why do they put Braille dots on the keypad of the drive up ATM? Why do they sell a pound cake that only weighs 12 oz? Why do we drive on parkways and park on driveways? Why dont you ever see baby pigeons? Why is a womens prison called a penal colony? Why is it called after dark, when it is really after light? Why is the alphabet in that order? Is it it because of that damn song? Would a fly without wings be called a walk? You know that little indestructible black box that is used on planes, why can't they make the whole plane out of that same substance? |
| Some of Life's Unanswered Questions |
 |
 |