For once, nobody was paying much attention to them. Normally everywhere they went flashing cameras, eager journalists and screaming fans surrounded them. Tonight all three were there in abundance but they weren't the focus. Sure, some of the girls lining the street might have come to see them but it was more likely they were there to see Brad Pitt or Matt Damon. Or Liam Trent.
Nick knew that their presence might rate a mention, at least in the teen magazines, but most of the journalists were clamouring to get a brief interview with the nominees or their companions, not visiting pop stars.
Still the flashbulbs blazed as they walked down the red carpet, even in the bright California sunshine and Nick felt himself break into a light sweat in the early evening heat.
"I shouldn't have come here," he whispered to Brian as a journalist asked a TV star who she would tip to win Best Actress.
"We were invited. Of course we should be here."
Nick shook his head; sure they were invited but why? The studio really couldn't be aware of what had happened or they'd never have asked them to play that night, surely? And just because they'd been invited he hadn't had to come and they definitely didn't have to carry out their plan.
Nick was relieved to get inside the auditorium. It was unseasonably warm and he was far too hot in his stiff tuxedo. Much longer in the heat and the spikes he'd painstakingly twisted his hair into might have wilted.
The other Boys protectively positioned themselves two either side of Nick as they took their seats and, as the ceremony got under way, Nick found himself wishing he was back outside, regardless of flat hair and sweat. It seemed so interminably long and boring as endless people of whom Nick had never heard took to the stage to thank more people of whom he had never heard.
Nick shifted restlessly, he couldn't even see Caitlin. What if she wasn't here? He really wished he were anywhere but here. On stage performing, at home playing Nintendo, out on his boat, out drinking back in Florida, this was such a bad idea...
When they'd first been asked he'd liked the idea. That was a month ago and he hadn't seen the guys for almost three months, not since they'd finished the tour just before Christmas. He'd been at home for three months and hated every minute of it. He thought he was having fun some of the time, he'd certainly hit as many parties as he could, but he'd also been hitting the bottle... and the fridge. Scared that he was slipping into a cycle of depression, Nick had welcomed the idea of a public appearance at the Oscar ceremony followed by a performance at the 20th Century Fox after party until, that was, they announced the nominees.
He should have known Caitlin would be nominated, ever since that stupid movie came out hers had been described as an "Oscar-winning" performance and, when he thought about it, even if she hadn't been nominated she would probably have been in attendance, after all she was part of the Hollywood "scene" now and, well, Liam would be there.
Nick had thought about pulling out but AJ persuaded him not to. Caitlin must have known about their performance because there was no way the studio was going to throw a post-Oscars party without expecting one of the stars of their Best Picture-nominated movie to attend. If Caitlin didn't want the Backstreet Boys there, AJ reasoned, she'd have vetoed it. Which meant this was the perfect opportunity for Nick to show her he was sorry.
Nick had spent the weeks since then wavering between hope that Caitlin had allowed it because she wanted to see him and fear that she knew nothing about it. If the latter was the case Nick wasn't sure he could stand seeing her again.
It had been almost a year since she'd ignored his pleas and walked away, back to LA. Even then she'd been rescuing him, demanding that he return to Europe and complete the tour after he'd retreated to his parents' home and locked himself in his room with a bottle of Stolichnaya. He'd done as she asked, throwing himself into his performance, taking to the stage the only thing that kept him sane. And, of course, the parties. Caitlin had told him he was obviously too young for a relationship, that maybe it was her fault; she should have let him have more time to "make the most of his position". So that's what he had done. But no amount of alcohol could assuage his guilt; it was that, after all, which had messed things up in the first place. He was surrounded by pretty girls, but not one had lips as soft as Caitlin, or hair as silky, or eyes as beautiful, or made him laugh as much, or made him feel so... so right.
Nick's reverie was broken as AJ leant towards him and whispered,
"Man, you'd better get back with Cait, if I've had to sit through this for nothing, I'm gonna..."
"Shhh," Kevin admonished them. "They're doing the nominees for Best Actress."
Nick watched the clips flit across the giant screens and tensed as Caitlin's face filled the screen. She was wearing the pale, vampire make-up and a blood tear fell from her eye; Nick hated the yellowish-green contacts she had worn for those scenes.
The auditorium tensed as Britney proclaimed,
"And the winner is..."
As Britney opened the envelope Nick's eyes were fixed to the screens. Caitlin was saying something to Hayley, was that who she was there with? Just Hayley? His eyes remained fixed, hopeful as he heard Britney squeal,
"Oh my goodness!"
He heard Tom Green announce,
"CAITLIN HOWARD! Come on up here Caitlin!"
As the audience erupted in applause Nick continued to look at the screen as the shot widened to show Caitlin being hauled to her feet. By Liam Trent. Nick's heart sank as the two hugged. She was still with him.
He watched in admiration as Caitlin lightly ran up the steps to the stage, he'd have been paranoid that he'd fall but she seemed so nonchalant and he felt himself gripping the arms of his seat as she turned to face the audience. He found it impossible to concentrate on her words; he was distracted by the way the lights reflected from the waves of her chocolate-brown hair, the way the strap of her pale green dress kept slipping from her shoulder, by the unexpected swell of pride that she had won.
She was looking at him.
Nick's heart seemed to stop as he felt himself trapped by those eyes that hovered almost exactly between green and blue.
She said his name and Nick felt the other Boys looking at him but he couldn't take his eyes off Caitlin as she hurriedly finished her speech and retreated to her seat. He was close to tears as he turned to Brian,
"She'll never forgive me."
Brian saw the intense suffering his friend was going through and the Boys quietly led Nick from the auditorium lest a prying camera should capture his tears.
