These are several of the musings that we have had through our days, philosophies if you will, or studies of the human nature. Or just more odd stuff. I'm guessin its the last one there.
Capitan Caveman (rant) email from Eric
This is part of an email that I (eric) wrote chris (chris) one night, i don't know how i got onto cereal or cavemen.
wow such a happy email thus far!!! well thats what ya get at 12:41 in the morn. and so much fun contained within to put on the website! whoo hoo!! hmm, ah well, hope the clubbing goes fun. and by that i mean if you actually go clubbing unknown people, kinda like captain caveman. you think that he and capn crunch ever fought for the title of captain? and that is why captain caveman is captain and captain crunch is cap'n, or maybe capn crunch is really a ghetto thug mafia hit man and he was always poppin caps in peoples asses so they just started callin him Cap'n. and captain caveman was once capitan caveman, because he is spanish. always takin those siestas and wearin that sombrero. maybe he beat someone and took his club and sombrero from them, tis highly possible. and yet, not possible because captain caveman is really a cartoon, but maybe he was such a threat that they took him and turned him into a cartoon to save the children from his acts of violence, but he was too strong a character to ignore so they gave him his own show, and turned him into a super hero caveman so that he could beat things up and be a good role model for the kiddies. and the capn, tired of thug life and poppin caps decided to start up his own breakfast cereal because he would have busted so many more caps if he had all the essential vitamins and nutrients, and so he is really trying to start up his own army of healthy wealthy children to take on capitan caveman and take his sombrero back because capn crunch once had bought a sombrero when he was on leave and then capitan cave man took it, and left the capn with that wierd lil hat he has now, and he has worn it for so long to keep the anger that he has welled up inside of him, and then when he finds capitan cave man hes going to bust his very final cap in his hairy lil caveman ass. and that is why capn crunch has all those commercials, because he hopes to run into capitan caveman somehwere in tv land, and finish what was started so many years ago. and also, there is probably a second, unknown enemy of capitan caveman because that person most likely payed off the soggies to go to some other country and leave capn crunch alone so that he could devote all of his time to hunting down capitan caveman, so the capn is really just a pawn in this secret characters game, a chess master of revenge if you will. and so capn crunch does this persons dirty work and they get off scot free because they only suspect capn crunch to have killed capitan caveman. and who are these people? its hard to say, it could be a conspiracy with all of the cereal barons in on it, cuckoo, count chocola, lucky, sonny, fred and barney and toucan sam and tony, they are all in it to take out capitan cave man because once back in the day he had his own cereal, but the cereal was really only rocks covered in sugar, because that is what cavemen ate back in capitan caveman's days, and the resulting law suits against the cereal companies for the damage done to childrens teeth and intestinal tracts left parents wary of buying cereal, and so eventually the money started becoming scarce for all our favorite cereal characters, and so they, many years later, wish to take down capitan caveman because of what he did and caused, and they are using one of their own to do it!! and so, you automatically begin to question who did capn work for before he became the cereal maker, it could have been the cereal barons, and he was only doing their dirty work. or, it could be capitan caveman, and he skimped him on payment one time and so that is why capn crunch is wantin to bust some caps.
Just because I found this site while I was perusing for pics of captain caveman
and capn crunch, why not check it out, it sounds like a worthy cause!
Unless Capn Crunch really is a master of the Kabbalah wherein he creates
his own reality by choosing to 'not' become admiral because then he wouldn't
be able to sail the seas he loves so well and he'd be stuck doing paper work.
Promote Cap'n Crunch
to Admiral
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Here's some stuff that I dug out of my High School Creative Writing class that I thought was pretty cool. - chris
Dusk
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Just a leisurely stroll through Sears's gun section.
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I don't even remember writing this one, but evidently I was sick of the requirement of repetition. ;]
I am me
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This assignment was a free write. Basically ordered to write down whatever came into our head for five minutes.
My puppy swam along the brook in the mountains. His tail got caught in some bark and he barked. A raindrop fell upward from the abyss that's called concrete. Evaporating into a brick like substance dissolved into kool-aid. Jaberwalky he screamed as the kool-aid monster came to life and started limping after him with its walker. It carried a shotgun and a syringe full of jello, lime jello. Running out of time, he and his posse crawled to the nearest 7-Eleven to buy a nickle and five pennies. Racing backward through the revolving door and gate swinging upward from the heavens the kool-aid monster ravaged the small town of Zimbobway. G. I. Joe's ran screaming through the sewer alleyways while stomping on dead mongeese who were killed in the war. I can't go on anymore cried one last mongoose who was stomped right after, he had gotten his wish. While kool-aid frolliked in the meddow of dafodills and razors, the army of thermometers stalked after him with great vengence. The kool-aid monster was not afraid for it had a magical flying camel on his side named Bantu-Grande who would often appear at his shoulder when he needed to belch off some great anguish and strife. Penguins marched across the polar ice caps into cuba where they got some sugar cane and giant stalks of barley for their secret stash of spices in the netherlands. All they needed now was some magical juju dust from the magical camels wings and they'd be victorious in creating the ultimate spice rack. A spice rack to revel in and to beat up all other spice racks. While the alligators slithered through the sewers, they collected all the dead stomped mongeese, 150 of them total. They would crawl to their secret hide away in dijibuti Africa to assemble a gigantic pyramid of mongoose bodies. Alas they could not because the directions were written in Japanese like all hard to assemble things like VCR's and eskimo huts of straw. The Kool-aid man and his camel buddy ravaged all the land and soon conquested it and named it the property of Aunt Jemima. As Aunt Jemima looked down upon the earth she was pleased so she made it rain a feast of pez onto the land, to reward her faithful followers, with one dark colored pez for each dead mongoose. The Horror!
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Here's a little rant Eric made on the package of a christmas present to me a while back. It's just damned cool.
(Eric: you should see the one i wrote on his birthday present! SAILORS don't cuss that much!!!)
TO: That one dude, what's his name? You know, that one guy. Man my mind FROM: is blank. Damn! It's on the tip of my tongue. Just said it a minute ago, oh yea! CHRISERIC! wait are you sure? yea, I think I'm sure, not sure. Hey Johnnay!! is that it? Damn! man, you know they say that crack rock doesn't take its toll until later in life, but that's not true. See, it all started when I was a little baby, and I got my first marmoset. The monkey, not the lounge chair. anyway, I got this marmoset and I named him Marm, for his first name, and Oset for his last name. but whenever I called his name I would yell "Hey, Marmoset!!" but he wouldn't come. because he didn't know English and I didn't know marmaset. I especially didn't know him because I didn't know that he was selling crack rock to school children in the ghettos of compton. but anyway, suffice to say, the relationship was fridged like a fridgedair. which reminds me of the very first time I owned a fridgedair. I gave him the first name Fridgea, and the last name was dair. but we never talked so anyway, I had this packet of peanuts. Did you know they worshipped peanuts in ancient egypt? Bet ya didn't, well they did!!! and I can prove it. Find me anybody from ancient egypt and ask them. I dare you. You can't do it can you? yea, you can't. but I can. See, I just asked one. He said that they did. The planters man was their god of the moon. bet ya didn't know that.
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This is something Eric wrote in an IM just the other day while I was gone and he got the auto response. Damned funny.
BANJ0 DUCK: hola!
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