|
Well, its almost Christmas again. I guess that means its time for a rant about some part of the holiday season that is pissing me off. I think my main beef right now is with Rudolf the Red-Nosed Reindeer. People don't understand why I hate this stupid reindeer so much, so I think I'll clarify. For starters, Reindeer are an important part of Scandinavian and Gerrmanic cultures, so it is no surprise that when christmas was adopted in those areas, that they added reindeer to the mystique of Christmas, making them the basis for Santa's transportation. There were eight reindeer that were all extreamely important to the story: Dasher, Dancer, Pranser, Vixen, Donner, Blitzen, Cupid and Comit. In different cultures there are different variations on these basic names. Now fast forward to the 1950s. The song: Rudolf the Rednosed Reindeer is released for public consumption. The public eats it up. It is a fun song with a good message that they hope their kids will absorb through osmosis. However, it is a complete bastardization of the pre-established cultural tradition. Let me show you what I mean by posing a question. If you were a Christian, how would you feel if a wiseman was added to the bible, making the total four? On top of that, give that wiseman a glowing red nose. How about if that wiseman was nessissary to guide the other wisemen to Jesus, because cloudy skis blocked the GIAGANTIC star glowing in the sky to guide their way. I know I'd be upset. But even that isn't the whole story. Look at what the song actually says. "All the other reindeer loved him..." They probably would hate him because he is a FREAK. I think the message is not to discriminate against people, but how would you feel if some ass-kissing, deformed reindeer got your job. Besides, how can there be another reindeer if only there are only eight that fly in the world. Do the math. In short, Rudulph the Non-Existant Reindeer can kiss my white ass.
You may call me a Grinch or a Scrouge because of this rant, but I don't really care. I like Christmas as a holiday, as a season of giving, and there is nothing wrong with the celebration, in any form, of a winter holiday. However, I don't like to see a good thing ruined by some stupid song. Think to yourself: Can I name all of the reindeer (Rudolf doesn't count, damnass) of Santas sled? If you can't, I recomend that you go learn them, for societies sake.
I'm sure there are plenty of people out there who like Rudolf, but hopefully I can sway your views with this rant. If not: its not my business if you can't grasp how blatantly commersial and foolish the idea, dare I say tall tale, of Rudolf really is. |
|
