Once in the Buddha land of Awesome Sound Thunder Buddha there was a poor thief named Robin, who wandered from land to land making his living from his wits and dreaming of the big score. He dreamed of wine, women, song and piles of bright gold coin. One day, while romancing a woman he had met in the country of Yan in her bedroom, he was surprised by the return of her husband. The husband saw him getting out of the bed as he came into his bedroom. Robin had no choice but to jump out the window and make his excape on a stolen horse and make his escape very naked and very cold. As Horse Theft was punishable by death and the lover was a powerful and ruthless man, Robin fled the country of Yan for his life. When he got outside of the city he spied some clothes and stole them.
He traveled west to the land of Wu, where he observed many monks who were preaching the Dharma. He heard them talk and was at first impressed somewhat with their words, but he was far more impressed by the size of their purses. He wondered at how he could possibly make so much money as they seemed to be making. He listened to the preacher talk of the Dharma and the wonderful law that could save all human beings. And then he saw that people were making donations to this preacher. He liked that idea.
He had already resolved on what to do next, when his decision was hastened by seeing Sheriffs and thugs from the land of Yan who were looking for him. He purchased some monks robes and put them on, simultaneously hiding his face from the posse and at the same time accomplishing the first stage of his plan. He boldly walked around the streets preaching
"All beings possess the Buddha Nature, make offerings to the Buddha and Enlightenment is assured!"
The disguise worked so well that one of the bodyguards of the Rich Merchant who was pursuing him, and whom knew him, gave him money. He knew he had a scam. He was very happy.
Unfortunately, as he was finishing his first day in his new role, a monk saw him, and said "are you returning to the monastery with us?" He wasn't sure what to say, so he accompanied the monk back to the monastery. There he found that these monks were actually seriously practicing meditation. He found that he could meditate well only when he focused on piles of gold reaching up to the sky, but strangely their activities left him feeling different. He felt so good, that the next night he was compelled to sneak out of the monastery after dark and go to town. He was in the local bar trying to pick up a particularly pretty honey when he saw one of the constables who was seeking him. He realized that he couldn't lead a double life in this country. The man almost recognized him before he slipped out the back. The next day he announced to the congregation that "I am going to go to the country of Yu to propagate the Law." He took the gold he had already earned stole some more from the Temple along with some sutras, retrieved his stolen horse, and set out for Yu. He had a grand scam in mind.
In the land of Yu, they spoke a similar language to his own dialect. He preached the Dharma there saying:
"all people have the Buddha Nature, Donations will set you free from the cycle of suffering."
Many people asked him questions, and he put on his most benevolent facade and answered them all, sometimes referencing the text he had brought with him and pretending to read it. He soon had disciples, and he sent some of them to Wu to learn the Dharma and how to read. When they came back he learned to read by pretending to teach them the meaning of passages from the Sutras. Money came in, and he was scrupulous with it. He built a temple, and in that temple he put a safe into which he put all the money. He was still afraid of the constables so he stayed out of the town. He spent his spare time counting gold and dreaming of living in a palace. He ate a pig and burned the remains to produce some ash, purchased an urn, and began telling people that these ashes were the Buddha's relics.
After some time he found that his temple was becoming a center of an entire network of propagation. He found himself preaching to the king of Wu. The king was impressed with the Dharma and wanted to learn more. He invited Robin to his Castle and Robin came and preached the Dharma there. Robin was impressed with the Castle, and ate the food offered him. Unfortunately right in the room with him was the Rich Merchant of Yan! He was scared, but he put on his best behavior.
The Rich Merchant, said:
"Venerable Sir, I must beg your forgiveness because you resemble a thief who stole something precious from me once."
Robin said;
"I can understand that, before I joined the Buddhist Order, I too was such a man, but then I saw that such things are empty and entered the Way. You should let go of your anger and realize that anger causes suffering. A thief can only experience the pain of turning the cycle of misery. You should pity this thief not feel anger towards him! His life must be really miserable."
The Rich Merchant said;
"Yes, I believe you are right! For all my money I have been miserable, and this thief stole the one thing that was most precious of all my possessions. I could not bear to live in my sorrow and anger. Now I see that even that attachment is empty. I would give up all my possessions and become a monk right now!"
Robin salivated at the thought, but he said instead;
"If you have abandoned attachments to worldly goods you have already "left home" and entered the way, there is no need for you to give up your worthy profession but you should rather use it to spread Buddhism Far and wide."
The Rich Merchant was so grateful that he donated money for a Stupa to the Buddha's relics.
Robin gleefully enshrined the Buddha's relics and began having the Temple Built. He put half of every donation into his treasure chest and the rest he used to build the Stupa and other things for his Sangha. Everyday he pretended to meditate and led the other monks in various exercises. He was surprised to see how happy and devoted the monks and lay people were. He was an expert at fleecing his flock and people gladly gave much of what they had to him. He was surprised at their touching ignorance, but every night consoled himself by counting the stacks of coins.
He was preaching at the castle when the King's daughter caught his eye. Even veiled he could see how exquisite she was in her appearance. He longed to get his hand on the Kings Daughter, and schemed on how to do that. She kept looking at him and he thought it might be that she shared his affections. She came up to him and asked to join the Buddhist Order. He accepted thinking, "I'm going to give this girl special lessons in the Kama Sutra!" She shaved her head, and he finally was able to get her alone two weeks later.
He said, "I wish to give you some special lessons."
She said, "Oh what a wonderful thing, my Guru!"
He took her in his study, but when he tried to touch her, she apologized to him. "All my life I've had that effect on men. I'm sorry if I'm having that effect on you!"
He said "don't be sorry!"
She said;
"Well now I've taken a vow, and I won't break it even for you. Thanks for testing my faith!" She ran from the room and after that would never allow herself to be alone with him. Robin didn't really know what to do.
Robin felt awful for some reason and made plans to leave. He figured that now that the heat was off he could take at least half of his money and leave, take back his old name in some place that hadn't heard of him.
He was about to do this when he found himself feeling very sick. He was so sick he could barely move. A physician was summoned and the physician told him he was dying.
One of his disciples told him "You should pray to the relics of the buddha."
Knowing them to be a fraud he almost laughed bitterly because he knew that all of his talk was but a scam. His attitude had been that of a cat on the prowl for mice and he didn't really give a lick for the Dharma! Now after all that loot was finally in his hands, if he should get ill and die, he wouldn't be able to do anything useful with it! He gave all the money to the poor and to his physician, asking him to tend him to the last day of his life. Then he decided to make a show of prayer to the relics of the Buddha. He genuinely wished that everything he had done up until now hadn't been a fraud and went to where he'd enshrined them. He went to the Stupa and with all his assembly present he opened the door to where the relics were enshrined.
Much to his astonishment there was a tiny little Buddha siting in them! This "Perceiver of the Worlds Sounds" Buddha said "I have come to help you preach the Dharma of Enlightenment!"
The Thief was astonished!
He said:
"But this whole thing has been a scam for me! How can you come to preach to me now?"
Perceiver of the Worlds sounds said:
"You have taught the Dharma have you not? While you did, unbeknownst to you, you put on the "Robe of the Buddha" and "preached this Dharma to this assembly." You have been teaching the eternal principles of Buddhism despite your lack of "belief." Your actions are the reason I have come here now.
"You have taught truly the principle that people must 'Rely on the Law and not upon persons'. Despite your doubts and fears you did the Buddha's work and served the Buddha. There are three kinds of Karma. Because you committed slander in your heart you are ill, but because no error came out of your mouth or your actions once you donned the "robe" of the Buddha's community, I have come to help you reach comprehensive wisdom and these 'relics' have become the Buddha's relics."
He was invited to sit before Many Treasures along with "Regarder of the World's Cries" inside the Stupa, and the listen to him preaching the secret of the eternity of the Buddha's enlightenment. When he was done he found his illness had completely healed and he ended up living with faith, courage, contentment and wisdom for another two years teaching the Dharma to all his disciples with joy and appreciation. When he died his own remains were put into Stupas as remains of a Buddha.
Thus it was that Robin Hood became Robin the Good and achieved enlightenment.
By Chris Holte