"I come bearing gifts," Josh announced when he showed up half-drunk at her door.

CJ looked approvingly at the assortment of liquor he carried and then disapprovingly at him. "Good, because that's the *only* way you're going to get out of a lecture for showing up here at �. what time is it anyway?"

"One sixteen. AM," he announced with a loopy grin.

"For showing up here at one sixteen a.m.," she concluded. "And just why are you darkening my door at this time of night � *morning* -- anyhow, Josh?"

"Celebration," he answered. "Donna's coming home soon, there's gonna be peace in the Middle East. And there's no one I'd rather celebrate with than you, Claudia Jean."

"You mean there's no one else who was stupid enough to let you in," she corrected.

"That too."

~~~~~

An hour later, they were sitting next to each other at her kitchen table, swigging beers and telling tales about lost loves. For his part, Josh mostly just sipped from his bottle and listened as CJ rambled on about past exploits. Currently, she was talking about some guy named Harry that she'd known for a week during her time at Berkley. Apparently, he'd had a very talented tongue. Or at least, that's what Josh thought she had said. He wasn't really paying attention to her words; he was too intrigued by the soft, reminiscent smile on her wide, generous mouth.

"You've got a great mouth, CJ," he blurted without thinking. She stopped mid-sentence and just looked at him. "I mean, when you smile, it just makes your whole face� and then your eyes�"

"Joshua, just how much *have* you had to drink?"

"Not nearly enough," he grumbled. And it was true. He was only on his second beer since arriving at her house. Which was probably a good thing, because the more he drank, the more discouraged he felt. He didn't know why, but he thought it might have had something to do with CJ's choice of topic. But since he'd said it aloud anyway, he might as well let her know he meant it. "I was serious about your mouth, you know."

"Really?" She sounded a little embarrassed but also a little pleased.

"Yeah. It's just very� kissable looking," he said.

He was pretty sure it was the beer making him share these thoughts, but he didn't care. Donna was in Germany with her� whatever� and CJ was here, smiling at him with that kissable mouth.

So he reached over and did exactly what he was thinking about: he kissed her. It was awkward and sloppy, their mouths not quite meeting perfectly, but it still felt good.

When he pulled away, he smiled at her lopsidedly, not sure how she would react. Luckily, instead of slugging him, she grinned back.

"Not bad," she said. "But practice makes perfect, right?"

"Right." He didn't dwell on why kissing her felt so right and so wrong at the same time. He just kissed her again.

This time it was better � with less awkwardness and more finesse. He concentrated on learning the feel of her lips, the slightly acidic taste of her tongue as it played with his. He allowed himself to relax and enjoy it. And when they broke apart this time, his smile was more sure.

"Perfect," she murmured moments before kissing him again. By the time their lips parted after their third kiss, there was a very noticeable bulge in his jeans and he was wondering where all the kissing would lead. And where he *wanted* it to lead.

He didn't have much time to think about it though, because soon CJ's tongue was in his mouth again and most of his brain cells ceased to function.

With nothing to lose, he let his hands wander and soon he was cupping one of her breasts. When she didn't protest or move away, he unfastened a few buttons on her blouse so that he could sneak a hand inside and rub a finger against her bare skin. She arched towards him and moaned as her nipple instantly hardened beneath his hand.

He pulled back in surprise as she reached up and started to undo the rest of the buttons so she could shrug her blouse off completely. With a quick flick behind her back, she undid her bra and let that fall to the floor, too.

He wasn't sure what he had expected, but it certainly wasn't that. And he found that he could do little more than just stare.

She squirmed a little in her chair and he couldn't tell if the intense look was making her nervous or aroused. Or maybe a little bit of both. "They're just breasts, Josh."

He licked his lips. "I know, but� God, CJ."

He'd pictured CJ naked more times than he could count � how could he not? She was a gorgeous woman � but his imagination had rarely pictured her like this. He'd always spent more time thinking about those long, sexy legs and how they would feel wrapped around him. But this� her breasts were beautiful, full and round with the duskiest nipples he had ever seen.

He wanted to taste them.

With this in mind, he reached out a hand and stroked the underside of one breast while leaning forward and kissing her again. This time, as the kiss ended, instead of relinquishing contact with her completely, he moved his lips to her chin, her neck, her collarbone. Soon he had reached the swell of her breast and he was just leaning down to suck a nipple into his mouth when she pulled away and stood up.

Sanity returned in a rush.

Fuck. This was a mistake. Hadn't he known that when he first started kissing her? But she had seemed so willing. Why else would she have taken her shirt off? He should have known not to push things. It's just that her mouth had looked so kissable and it had been months since Amy and part of him -- a small hidden part him -- had wanted that connection that CJ seemed to be offering.

Until, of course, she had pulled away. Right. She'd pulled away. That was usually a sign that a woman wasn't interested.

Embarrassed and humiliated at his over eagerness, he stood and headed for the door. His body was clamoring for some sort of sexual release, but he knew he couldn't go through with this. Not with CJ. They were friends. And friends didn't fuck each other. Not even when it was obvious that one of the friends was highly attracted to the other. Or when one of the friends lost his mind and started fondling the other in her kitchen.

He was so busy mentally kicking himself for groping her that he didn't even notice her following him until she reached out a hand and grabbed his wrist.

"I didn't mean we had to stop," she explained. Calmly. Rationally.

Good. That meant she wasn't mad at him. And then her words sunk in. "Wait � what?"

"I just thought maybe we should move this to the bedroom."

Really? *She* was propositioning *him*? But just in case he was reading the situation wrong, he had to ask. "The bedroom?"

"That is where this is heading, right?" she asked.

He didn't know what to say. His body was screaming yes but his head wasn't so sure. Was this really a good idea? Did he really intend to sleep with CJ because she was there and willing and he couldn't have Donna?

And what was her motivation? Did she really want him or was he just a poor excuse for some other guy? Not that he minded. He was a guy and sex was sex.

Besides, he loved her. He was man enough that he could admit that. Maybe it wasn't an all-consuming, passionate love, but it was love. She was one of his closest friends. Maybe at another time they could have been more than friends -- if Donna hadn't come along or CJ could forget what an arrogant jackass he could be at times. And that had to count for something, didn't it? The acknowledgement that there had once been the potential for more? Still� it was better to know going into the situation what was going on than to guess.

When he answered, he was horrified to realize his voice had gotten squeaky and that his words came out as more of a question than a firm declaration. "Yes?"

She eyed him with increasing annoyance. "Are you saying you *don't* want to do this?"

"Of course I want to do this! I'm a guy. And you're a gorgeous, half-naked woman. How could I possibly not want this?"

She looked a little relieved. "Ok, then. Come on."

She tugged on his hand and he followed her docilely to the bedroom where she proceeded to strip out of the rest of her clothes. He couldn't help but notice that her lower half was just as impressive as her upper. And those legs� he hadn't been wrong about those legs.

"That's it? I say ok and now you're naked and then we're going to, um --"

"Have sex, Josh," she patiently explained. "We're going to have sex. Now get undressed."

Who was he to argue when she was standing there naked before him and looking so completely desirable?

"Ok."

He started undressing, first unbuttoning and taking off his shirt and then sitting on the edge of the bed to remove his socks and shoes. She sat next to him, her back comfortably propped against the headboard.

He was in the process of removing his left sock when he suddenly remembered something and looked over at her in confusion. "Wait. Aren't you seeing that guy � what's his name? � Ranger Rick?"

"Ben," she answered through clenched teeth.

"Yeah, him."

"We decided to take a break."

He was so startled, he stopped in the middle of unzipping his pants. "Really? I thought you two were really tight. Carol told Donna you went away with him."

"Carol needs to learn to stay out of my life," she mumbled before adding more firmly, "If you must know, we *did* go away. He was decidedly more interested in the wildlife than in me. He even brought two tents."

Josh stared at her, uncomprehendingly. Then her meaning sank in. "Are you saying you two didn't--?"

She sat up a little straighter and glared at him. Even seated, she made a formidable � and arousing � picture. "Joshua Lyman, if you ever want to find out how good � how *great* -- I am in bed, you will not finish that thought."

"I'm just saying� If I had you naked and in my arms � which, I might add, is about to happen � I wouldn't have any problems."

She nudged his backside with her knee and looked pointedly at the erection he had just exposed. "So I noticed."

He smirked at her. "You're impressed, aren�t you?"

"Very," she answered dryly as she continued to stare at his cock and lick her lips.

And then she was pulling him backwards towards her and all conversation ceased. Her mouth was wet and welcoming, her body soft and yielding. Josh couldn�t get enough of tasting her, of touching her, of learning each little nuance: how she laughed when he brushed his lips across her stomach, how she sighed when he caressed her thigh, how she shuddered when he probed her sex.

And the things she did to him � the way she kissed that spot right beneath his ear, the way she teased his nipple with her tongue, the way she pumped his cock in her hand, the way she touched him in all the right spots. He couldn't get enough.

If something didn't happen soon, he was going to embarrass himself by coming before he was even inside her.

With that in mind, he rolled her to her back and started to move above her. She stopped him with a hand against his chest.

"Just� hold on a minute."

She twisted beneath him and he rolled aside, giving her room to move. Sitting up a little, she fumbled with something in the nightstand then turned back and tossed a wrapped condom at him.

"You're going to need this," she explained.

He stared at the disk in silence. This was really happening. He was about to make love with CJ Cregg. It was a scary yet heady thought, and it took him a moment to adjust to the reality of the situation.

She must have misinterpreted his silence, though, because when he didn't make any sort of move to open the wrapper, she quickly added, "I'm serious, Josh. Wear it or leave."

He shook himself out of the daze and his eyes flew to hers. "No� I� yeah, I'll wear it."

Quickly opening the package and rolling the condom on, he positioned himself above her and entered her. Damn. She was so hot, so wet.

He went slowly at first, wanting to build the passion back up, but CJ wouldn't let him. Hooking her legs around his hips, she dug her heels into his ass, urging him deeper and faster. Pretty soon he was at the point where he could barely keep from coming.

"Claudia� I can't wait much longer," he moaned.

It was at this point he realized he didn't need to worry. One glance at her face and he could tell she was close. So close. Her eyes were glazed, her breathing heavy, and he could feel the tension in her body. A few more strokes and she was climaxing, her muscles tightening painfully around him.

He couldn't control his body any longer. His deep, rapid, controlled thrusts gave way to clumsy, frantic pulses. With a hoarse groan, he came.

When he was done, he rolled away from her and they lay on the bed side by side, panting.

When he recovered his breath enough to speak, he pumped a fist in the air and declared, "I am *da man*!"

He turned to look at her and she raised a speculative eyebrow at him. It was the same look she'd given him numerous times before, right before she'd smacked him in the head. He hastily amended his statement. "You are *da woman*?"

Her eyebrow lowered.

"Thank you," she replied demurely, "You know, I've been telling you guys for ages now that I am fantastic in bed."

"You certainly are, Claudia Jean."

She acknowledged his compliment. "Thank you. For that and for, well, you know."

"The best orgasm you've ever had?" he smirked while flashing her one of his dimples.

"ONE of the best orgasms," she admitted before threatening, "But if you EVER �"

"Never," he promised.

God, this was fucked up. Here he was in bed with CJ, bantering and teasing like it was any ordinary day in the office, and all he really wanted was to be doing this with another leggy, smart-mouthed woman. One who was currently lying in a hospital bed in Germany with a Heathcliff-on-the-moor gomer dancing attendance on her.

CJ must have noticed his change in mood because she instantly rolled to her side to look at him and said, "She's coming back, you know."

He jumped a little at the soft and sincere comment. "Christ, CJ! How do you DO that?"

"What?"

"Read my mind like that."

"No mind reading required, mi amor. It's written all over your face."

"Am I really that transparent?" Somehow he had hoped that he could hide his feelings better.

"'Fraid so," she told him. "If I was any less secure in my femininity, or if it was any other woman than Donna we were talking about, I'd be taking offense right now."

"Geez, CJ, I am *so* sorry�"

She took his chin in her hand, made him look right at her, and then kissed him softly. "Don't be. You love her."

"Yeah," he admitted softly. "But she's with that wanker."

"But she's not bringing him back with her," CJ reminded him.

"Only because his magazine needs him back in Gaza," he groused.

"No," she corrected him quietly and firmly, "because she doesn't need him here."

He narrowed his eyes at her. "How do you know that?"

"I know many, many things. You'd be amazed at what I know. And how I know them," she announced loftily. "For example, I know you should probably get rid of that condom right about now."

"Shit. I forgot."

He jumped from the bed and went into the bathroom to take care of it.

As he ambled back to the bedroom, he looked around, taking in all the things he had missed when they had first come into her room � the scarf draped over the lamp, the photos on the dresser, the clothes hanging haphazardly out of her drawers, the large collection of CD's piled next to the stereo. It was all so CJ. And he didn't belong here. Not when his heart was still in Germany.

Instead of climbing back into the bed with her, he leaned down and reached for his clothes. "I should go."

She stretched her arm out and stopped him. "Don�t. Stay."

He hesitated. "It won't be awkward in the morning?"

She laughed. "Of course it will. Stay anyway. I'll make you breakfast."

"You don't cook."

"Ok, I'll *buy* you breakfast. Just stay, ok?"

He stayed.

~End~