| 25 may 2001 i'm sucking down a werther's butterscotch. i had an addiction to these back in freshman year. kristie liked them, too. i remember that after we broke up sophomore year, jay, jack, and i stopped by a supermarket, and i got a bag of them and dropped them off at the doorstep of kristie's house. i guess it was supposed to be a sentimental statement of sorts, but, who knows what happened to that bag of candy. anyways... ----- yesterday, i met up with alan, peter, and jerry at the stanford driving range. we hit a few golf balls, and then alan had to head off at 7:15 to catch his flight to san diego. we had a quick dinner at the stanford treehouse, this mexican food place the also serves burgers and readymade sushi and stuff. sitting there, we all realized that we were OLD. you remember those days when you would visit your college hangout, and you would see these guys who had obviously graduated years ago? and you'd think, "god, they're like old and shit, so they're just fuckin' losers!" well, that was us. granted, we just needed a quick bite to eat, so we didn't _plan_ on being at the treehouse, but definitely felt odd. we were surveying the crowd, and the general concensus that the new batch of college students girls is pretty cute. and more open to showing more skin. a lot more girls (well, probably because of the great norcal weather) wear these strappy tank tops and stuff... and they go braless a lot of the time. it's just really different from when we were at school... even though the weather hasn't changed, the girls back then were just, well, a little more conservative with their choice of apparel, you know? there was this one really cute girl in white. we all pretty much noticed her. anyways... so yeah, you know the scene in _st. elmo's fire_ where rob lowe's character, billy hixx, goes back to school, and all the kids are happy to see him? but later, he finds out that all they care about is if he can get them drugs? that's kind of how i feel. not about the drugs, though. but how when i visit stanford taiko, they're probably genuinely happy to see me, but for the wrong reasons. yeah, they're pleased that i'm there, but it's not because i really belong with them in any way... so i guess that makes me kinda sad. but really, it is time to let go... but guess what i'm going this weekend... i'm helping them cook food for the taiko invitational people. yeah. yay. big whoopee. sucked back in by college kids. i'm kind of reluctant to go, but i guess they asked for help, and i offered, so there's nothing i can do about it. i just want to hang out more with the alums, because, well, they're much more similar to me than these college kids. so no big plans for memorial day weekend. maybe jeremy (our de-facto host, since he and kate actually have their own place, unlike me who lives with some random roommates) will host a barbecue or something. but i'm going to try to hang out more with my old taiko buds like barden, emi, and kara. probably hit gombei (my fave japanese restaurant, and taiko eating venue of choice) for dinner one night. ----- oh yeah... monday is karen's 25th birthday. she'll be the same age as me! yup. i wonder if she's gotten my little gift... it's nothing big, just a japanese import cd by st. etienne. track 7 is the song that she kept on repeating when she visited last july. it's a clubby, perky, dancy song called "he's on the phone," which apparently is a really popular hit among st. etienne fans even though i own all their u.s. release albums and have never heard of it before. but at their concert, they played it near the end, and i've never seen such a group of happy concertgoers. everyone was dancing! sigh. mass euphoria is a great thing to behold. ----- friday, and i'm hella ancy to start off the weekend. i'm picking up kara from the airport tomorrow night, and she was planning on staying at my place. i like being host. i rarely get to do that for my friends. but she e-mailed me last night and said that she's staying with a friend in palo alto instead, so i'm kind of bummed. i thought it would be cool when we were going to sleep at night, because i have had some great conversations with my friends while we're lying in our beds at night. relaxed one-on-one talks are the best. i remember most fondly the times when emi and i have slept in the same room. we just spout off on hollywood and movie knowledge, for the most part. it's kind of neat, though, because it's like we both simultaneous recognize when we need to start trying to fall asleep... so the conversation just trails off... and sleep becomes us very comfortably. that said, i think it'd be cool to have a female roommate. not a girlfriend, because that's a totally different living situation, but a platonic girl friend roommate. then again, i think the sexual tension could get awkward. i THRIVE in sexual tension. i love it. there's this sense that anything might happen and change things in an instant. like you're standing on a mountain, and at any moment you might just lean over and fall down the slope, faster and faster. the night that karine and i got together was kind of unexpected for me (that's the thrill). i invited her over for some drinks and stuff, and we were listening to this massively velveeta cheese mix that she had called "soul genesis." what a fucking cheesy title! anyways, we were both lying on the ground, and i just declared loudly, "i love tension." the weeks before, we had just been getting together at night to have some smokes and chats, but i think it was apparent that something was happening between us. so there we were lying there, and i remember the amazing sense of spontaneity when i took her hand and kissed it. then i kissed her nose, i think. and then, of course, we made out for hours, listening to that damn cheese tape. i vividly remember there being lots of tongue. ha ha. |