| 21 may 2001 *yawn*� my cubicle location sucks.� i can't take naps without everybody walking by noticing.� i think i caught my neighbor, chi-kai, snickering.� damn.� i haven't eaten today yet, (it's like 4:30) and i still have some sort of coma!� hm.� maybe it's because i've got no food in my system. yesterday i had the worst food coma, coupled with a buzz that wore off too quickly and left a huge headache.� i got up late, as usual, and i decided that since it was my last WWF pay-per-view, i'd treat myself to my usual pizza dinner.� so i didn't eat until 5, when i ordered my pizza: a large round table pepperoni rostadoro.� the order took an hour, so i bided my time with two beers. damn.� beer on an empty stomach.� you know what that means.� i was buzzing.� head spinning!� woozy!� my tolerance is really bad now.� but anyways, i had a grand old time trying to finish my pizza... of the 12 slices, i finished 10, and i just felt sick afterwards.� why i keep doing this to myself, i don't know, but at least it was my last time i could use the WWF as my excuse, seeing as how i'm moving out of here, and i won't be able to utilize the secret cable descrambler (shhh!) any more. the pizza was good, though.� i just ate too much of it.� oh, and the descrambler wasn't working, so all i could see was that strangely green-tinted warped sidebar fuzz on the tv.� the audio was fine, but i just couldn't could bear not being able to see what i was listening to. so i climbed upstairs and promptly passed out.� and woke up to emi's phone call with a huge headache. yup.� lots of phone calling as of last night.� there was a long phone conversation with emi, which was interrupted when her apartment complex's fire alarm went off, followed by a late-night hour-long chat with karen (yay!), who returned my phone call. this morning, my friend amy woke me up by calling my cell phone, and we talked for a good half and hour before i went to work.� so basically, my recent life has been dominated by phone conversations with my female friends. i should have been really ecstatic that karen called, but after i talked to her, i felt rather uneasy.� it was really odd.� i think it had to do with some of the things she said about her personal life, some happenings that occured.� i guess i just felt really far away from her, and it seemed like our lives were headed nowhere close to each other, and i kind of got bitter. i dunno.� i still don't feel really good about our conversation.� i feel sort of like i don't recognize her any more.� maybe it's because i haven't talked to her in over five months.� hopefully i'll get over it.� and maybe i should call her up more often than once every 150 days or so. karen said something that bugged me.� she didn't bug me, just the facts in a statement she made.� basically, she says kissing is really bad, because mouths are so full of germs.� i mean, she's a med school student, so she must know some things that i don't.� but that really is sad.� kissing is one of the most beautiful things, and now it's like tainted by the idea of "oh shit, what kind of nasties are we exchanging now?"� so that's a rude awakening for me.� bummer! ----- i saw _bridget jones's diary_ today.� yes.� during work.� on a monday.� it was REALLY good.� i love relationship movies.� and despite everyone bashing renee zellewegger about her being fat in the movie, she was really totally utterly loveable.� who cares about the weight? she looked totally fine (normal, unlike her current anorexic state), she was just fabulously funny and witty and innocently earnest in the movie.� her british accent was spot on, and it added to her sexiness. i think i shall see it again when it comes out on video.� it kind of had a similar affect on me as _swingers_... the tales of doomed singles finally finding love. i saw a potentially cute movie in _serendipity_, with john cusack and kate beckinsale.� the plot is about two strangers meeting, and they think that they may be right together, but the girl wants to make sure it's fated to be.� so she writes her name and number (which he doesn't know) in a used book and gives it away, and guy has to find it.� i guess he doesn't or something, because the movie snaps to years later, when both are either engaged or married or something.� and one day, the guy stumbles across the book, and you know, it throw all the relationships into turmoil and the two start to wonder about each other and stuff.� there's lots of coincidences and hints at destiny in the movie. i love the idea of fated love.� it makes me feel like all is right and purposeful in life.� yes.� i know it's silly conjecture and all about retrospective analysis, but i still like the idea anyway. i like john cusack.� and kate beckinsdale is a cute.� so you know, when you like both of the main characters, it may be hard to resist the movie itself.� i hope it's good.� it certainly seems so. phew.� i'm wide awake now.� i get these coma periods every day for a while. oh yeah.� cleo e-mailed me back.� yay!� i thought for a while that i had totally freaked her out with my web sleuthing.� like she felt she was exposed, but didn't want to be and all that.� but anyways, that's all good and stuff, so no worries there.� i don't like the idea that i've scared people off... it always leaves me wondering, "what the hell did i do?"� i still am wondering that with the karine alienation thing, but hey, if you don't want to talk to me, that's your prerogative.� i can only bug and tap and poke you for answers for so long before i realize that it's really not my problem. |