| 11 dec 2001 "-does he make you laugh? -he doesn't make me cry" so starting tomorrow, i'll be working at greenfield networks. yup. i met their VP of engineering and talked to him for about an hour. i asked him about the company's prospects, their marketing relations, their overall goal and stuff... and it sounded reasonable. i mean, they're a chip company, so as chi-kai says, their chances of survival are contingent on a lot of fantasmagorical happenings, but... i dunno. they sound like they know what they're doing (i will admit that i'm very gullible, though) but anyways, so after questioning, i started... the negotiation process! so basically the original offer had two options... a high salary/low options, and a low salary/high options. so i basically asked for the high/high. which wasn't that big a deal, so i was pretty confident they'd give it to me. but i did notice that the dude didn't let me talk that much, and he immediately went and said, "hm. you're already getting a good offer, blah blah blah." so i found that amusing to watch, the whole game unfolding. so i quickly told him what i wanted, and i said that i'd start the next day if i got it, and i got it. i have to thank chi-kai for instilling me with balls. i know that i might have pulled for more (especially the salary), but i'm happy that i at least got what i got. so he printed out the offer letter, i signed it, and we shook hands. so i start tomorrow. i left the building in really good spirits. apparently knowing that i have an income is really important to my emotional well-being. knowing that i have a place to go and a means to support myself. so i pulled out my cell phone in the windy parking lot, and before i even lit up a cigarette, i called my mom. she's gonna always be the first to know about big happenings in my life. i don't plan to call her, but i just do... and i'm happy that she's the first person i want to talk to. she was kind of sad i didn't choose cisco, because she's a rather conservative person and likes big companies. and frankly, i'm kind of sad about cisco, too, but it's more because i feel guilty that they were so nice to me and expressed a lot of interest in me... it's always flattering to know that i am wanted beyond my expectations. so i still have yet to call them and give them the bad news... i'm not looking forward to that phone call. but anyways... yup! i have a job. i tried calling chi-kai and adam at vivace, but they weren't there. but i talked to laurie, the receptionist, and happily blurted out that i have a job... finally... after a month and a half of unemployment. hm. i've been getting headaches lately. i think it's because i don't drink enough liquids. yesterday, i think i got by with one cup of water the entire day. and that's bad news . i blame it on my laziness and not going to safeway and stocking up my dr. pepper. i swear, i live on dr. pepper, and if greenfield doesn't carry it, i'm the first in line to clamor for it... basically, at my two previous companies, i've been the reason why they carry dp, because if i don't have it, i get upset. yeah. i'm a dr. pepper bitch. so nice! jay's back now, watching mtv, and i'm taking him and margaret out to indian food tonight, and it's going to be ON ME. because i am going to be making money once again! i haven't eaten all day, so i'm saving up my stomach for a night of disgusting consumption of obscene amounts of pungent, aromatic flavorful food. it's gonna be grand. hold on. i'm gonna get some tea. damn. that's good shit. it's this japanese milk tea by kirin, called "gogo no kocha" (afternoon red tea). there's a flavor of tea that's the same name, but it's red... basically it doesn't have the milk in it. the milk is a MUST. this kind is sort of opaque and beigish. very good. i highly recommend it, although it's kind of pricey... $5 for 1.5 liters. on it, there's this small inscription that makes me smile... "sunlight and mist turn a young leaf into tea. tea can turn you into something new. tea. a natural gift of love." hm. what else to talk about... i'm excited about writing my journal from a cubicle instead of in my hard folding chair in the living room. i said earlier that for some reason, i write better entries at work than at home. i also wonder if i'll be receiving e-mails from the posse at vivace now that my job search is over... i thank them for all their words of advice and encouragement and even their words of admonishment; it's good to have that kind of support system in my professional life... i've never had that before, and it's something i'm going to try to maintain... my professional contacts. i came out of teralogic not having developed any of that stuff, and now i realize how important it is, because without these relationships, i wouldn't have gotten my interviews at cisco, greenfield, or even caspian. i think i owe adam a lunch. well, i don't think... i definitely do. and i'm also excited about finally redeeming myself and learning about networking... greenfield is reputed to be HUGE sticklers on documentation, and i saw a bit of it today and was astounded... binders full of diagrams, specs, etc. i'm going to try my hardest to pore through that stuff and learn as much as i can, especially about the core chip, where most of the processing takes place. the CTO, when he gave me the offer, said that i have the opportunity to not just be a chip designer, but a network engineer. and i'm going to try my best. i kind of miss those times back at teralogic when i was kind of the "video standards" guy who knew about all the different ATSC formats. stuff like that. it's time to stop being lazy. that quote at the top of my page is from _ocean's eleven_. when george clooney and julia roberts had that exchange, i immediately thought of kristie. because that's how our relationship was. we had a lot of silliness and fun and rambunctious times, but we also had a lot of fights and stuff. a lot of tears were shed on her part. in a letter she wrote me after we had broken up, she said, "i don't want to cry anymore." and that just broke my heart, because i never wanted her to cry. crying makes me freak out. no matter how angry i am at her, i immediately disregard all the shit i'm feeling and drop everything and attend to the girl once she cries. it's like my ultimate achilles heel. but anyways, i just felt sad when kristie wrote that because i so wanted us to work out. but because of a lot of things (on both sides of the relationship), we just didn't function right. but anyways... so that's what i was immediately reminded of when i heard that dialogue in the movie. laughter is no good if it's accompanied by a lot of sorrow... people just don't like that kind of rollercoaster ride. so if you have a secret to be able to keep the laughter and cut out the sadness, you've got it made, i think. ok. it's almost 5:30. i'm gonna rest up a bit (i.e. hydrate myself to get rid of this budding headache), and prepare for gorging myself at sneha. bye! it's been a good day. |