| 4 jun 2002 the mtv movie awards are this thursday night. i was reading ew.com, and their headlines were like, "backstage at the movie awards," so i was like, "oh shit, i missed them." but it's ok. they tape the show and then air it later, and i guess it was a good thing because one of the musical numbers by hosts jack black and sarah michelle gellar had some technical difficulties, so they had to do it again. according to johnny knoxville, there will be _jackass_ movie this summer?! wow. happy! here's sizes and weights and values of common award statuette's. i am surprised an oscar is so heavy. i'm eating this cup of ramen, and when i try to suck in some noodles, the steam rising from the soup makes me choke. glarg. so yesterday, i was really tempted to finally get a domain name and re-do my site. ever since i saw movable type last year, i was pretty infatuated with it. it looks much more mature and refined than blogger. and i like the fact that it has a template for a calendar, because i still want to arrange my entries by date. so i was doing some research on dreamweaver, and then i realized that if i wanted to do stuff at work and at home, i'd need two versions: one for the mac, and one for the pc. shit. so that's when i decided that i had to go to an automatic content generator app. but then, i couldn't come with a domain name i really wanted. like, originally i thought i wanted "dardy" in there somewhere, but now i'm thinking i don't want to have my identity directly tied into the domain like that. so then what? i'll need to find a phrase or something that's cool, dardy-esque, easy to remember, and NOT TAKEN. ugh. last night, around midnight, i started calling people up asking about domain registration, web hosting, and opinions on one name i came up with. i have to remind myself not to call so late. adam had just gotten in bed, mike was trying to sleep, and alan was busy doing stuff. none of them seemed enthused at the conversation. yup. bad time to call. i just made myself a peanut sandwich. while i was waiting for the bread to toast, i went over and got a plastic utensil to spread the pb. a minute later, i realized i had grabbed a FORK. why the hell does my brain short circuit like that? i hate it. i think i have a low tolerance of stupid acts because my dad always reinforced the notion that i need to "use my brain" (as he said it in mandarin). but anyways, back to the journal issues... i'm kind of worried if i start to use a blogging tool. i like the fact that i get all my writing done once a day, and i don't have to deal with it again. if i blog, then i bet my compulsive nature will drive me to post something the moment i get the urge. and while that would be kind of cool (i already e-mail myself stuff sometimes), it will eat up my life, i think. i have a strong aversion to getting obsessed. my personality/brain chemistry/whatever make it really easy for me to go overboard with stuff, and i don't like it. i guess you could call it a control issue. and right now, i feel like my life is nicely balanced... the tv schedule i stuck to is finally on a hiatus, and even though i got my new camera, i've had a healthy enthusiasm for taking pictures instead of something more obsessive. so i don't want to fuck it up with going crazy over a blog. hm. well, in the end i was *this* close to reserving a domain name, but i told myself that there really is no hurry, and i will sleep on it and see how i feel in the morning. and you know what happens in the morning, right? yup. i lost the burn. but anyways, if i ever think of a domain that i *really* like, i'll probably get it. movable type will come later. yesterday, i dropped my car off for the 30K mile service. for big services like that, they give people a rental car, so i happily hopped in a cute silver civic and drove off. the only requirement was that i replace the gas that i use, so before going into work, i dropped by mcdonald's and the shell station for two gallons of gas. so while i was pumping full speed, i kind of counted the rhythm of the digits flying by... 6, 7, 8, 9, STOP! the tube was blocking the 3rd decimal place, but the rest of the digits read: 2.00. wow! i felt like seinfeld in that american express commercial. but then, i moved the gas tube out of the way, and it was actually 2.001, but hell.. i'll take it. i was only a thousandth of a gallon off! this month is my high school 10-year reunion. i'm not going. i wouldn't mind, but i can't justify flying all the way back to texas for two days spent with people, most of whom i didn't even know. i would probably count on my hands the number of people i would actually want to see. the thing is, though, i enjoyed high school. but now i realize that my high school life was totally lame. so what is that then? ignorance, it must be... the fact that i had no idea what life could be like simply meant that i was blindly satisfied with what i had at the time. i attribute a large part of it to having overprotecting asian parents and being so young that i couldn't drive until my senior year. but i still signed up for a class book for the reunion; i am definitely curious to see some old faces and see what they're up to. there was a brief questionnaire, including questions like "who were your crushes?" (patricia, sabrina, and amie) and what was your favorite moment? (winning state and nationals in acDec, and the rival high school's plot to distract me with porn). did i talk about the porn plot before? basically at the state competition my senior year, i was sort of the captain or something, so i had my own suite. and the night before the main competition, i was taking a dump with the bathroom door open, and i heard this pitter patter of feet, and a whispered count of "one, two, three!" and WHOOSH. a _penthouse_ magazine shot in from under the door. they were trying to prevent me from studying by giving me free porn! and the whole thing was started from the previous year, when they found out what hotel room i was in and shoved a nice _playboy_ centerfold unfurled in its entire glory under the door. *smile* they were cool guys; i never thanked them. and yes, i did forego studying for a bit to leaf through the _penthouse_. but back to the reunion questionnaire, there was one intriguing question... "if you knew what you know now, what would you do differently?" i thought about it for a long time. i mean, i might have said that i wanted to hang out more, party more, go crazy, have sex, blah blah blah. but honestly, i pretty much like the way my life has turned out, though... maybe if i had been more socially mature, i would have done better with k1. that's probably the only thing that matters to me, in terms of what a better high school life would have done for me. so at first i answered "nothing," but then later added, "well, i would have liked to have been less conservative." it was kind of a jab at some high school acquaintances that were offended when i mass-mailed some excerpts of a stanford publication on sex called "the g-spot." ah, the glorious bible belt. i really wanted to way "fucking conservative," but then again, i don't want them to censor me. ok. you want to know what lameness is? some dude/dudette is e-mailing out viruses using my e-mail address. i got an e-mail from snapfish.com yesterday saying "we have quarantined your e-mail because it had a virus." and i was like, "uh....riiiight." *eyeroll* why are people so dumb? it's not so much annoying as it is totally sad! it's like watching that _cops_ show... a veritable showcase of the dregs of society. yup. totally pathetic. you know, if these people were pissed at me for some reason, then i would actually understand better. but if they're just fucking around... i'm trying really hard to see how that can be a redeeming activity, but honestly, for the life of me, i can't understand why it's not a complete waste of time. like i said, evolution has clearly not made enough progress on the human race. all righty. time for basketball. |