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| 13 may 2001 "-you're unusual -love me -unusual" so i was testing out the macro capabilities of my camera at gombei, and when i stuck the little snout of my p1 into my order of california rolls, some of the other people at my table were like, "dude, what are you doing?" i was kind of surprised at the detail (you can see the moisture on the rice!), although i kind of skipped the whole composition part. saturday morning, i woke up with a crazy case of bad hair. still naked, i ran out into the living room, grabbed my camera, and took the picture of myself in the mirror. i actually have a really weird face on, and add that to the morning puffiness, and what you get is a really scary and rather ugly look. hence the cropping job i did on the photo; i don't want drive you guys away :) but, if you look carefully at the picture, can you tell what manipulation i did to the photo? think about it! and let me know... i am currently infatuated with the sony dsc-f707 camera. i first saw the 505 version when i was researching my first digital camera, and while it was too big to be my "carry comfortably" camera, i remember being intrigued by its assymetrical design. it kind of reminded me of a mech from battletech or something. and now there's this 5-megapixel f707 version, and i spent an hour last night reading the review on dpreview.com. it seems they like it. it has cool shit! like a laser-assisted autofocusing system, and infrared night shots! and plus, it's silver and looks totally rad. so, basically what i want out of my 2nd camera is mainly: 1) better low-light autofocusing 2) aperture control 3) manual focus after trying to shoot the taiko dress rehearsal, i was painfully reminded that my cute little dsc-p1 nugget just can't do the job. of the 50 pictures i took, only a handful were actually in focus. yes, i know that the problem is mainly in the fact that i wasn't using a tripod, and that the p1's lens is way too slow. the main resistance to getting the new camera is the fact that i really don't want to spend the money (refer to my desire that i were rich). and even if i get this camera, i'll still use my p1 as my main one, since i can carry it everywhere. and plus, the p1 works just fine in daylight. it's only when i'm in tougher shooting conditions that i'll need something better, but honestly, how often will i be in that position? *ponder* ah, the dangers of being a gadget freak. i want advice from adam and eric. i've already talked to mike, and he is kind of positive about it. ----- so i've been developing this habit of writing to myself whenever i feel particularly moved. this is what i wrote after the stanford taiko spring concert: ah, i didn't expect this coming, although i should have. so the concert was amazing (especially the three original songs in the first half), and while i was glowing and positively astounded for a while, it quickly degenerated into my feeing ridiculously bummed and sad to the point where i wanted to go home and sulk. and listening to the _twin peaks_ soundtrack right now isn't helping either. i mean, if stanford taiko hadn't progressed, or its artistic and musical capacity hadn't expanded at all, i wouldn't miss it. but what they showcased tonight is head and shoulders above anything i even came close to doing when i was in the group (with the possible exception of "falling rain" my senior year)." i want to be a part of that again. i mean, after i dropped off the last of my passengers at tresidder parking lot, i just wanted to leave campus as fast as fucking possible. i have never wanted to escape stanford so badly. but i was asking it to do something for me that was impossible, and that acknowledgement just crushed me. i want to be a part of something. something that grows out of the seed of creation and artistic expression. something that i can show the rest of the world in a brief yet meaningful exhibit, which leaves the audience and beholders walking away, thinking that they've just been touched by something wonderful. i miss art. i miss the profound way it touches me, my group, and my audience. i miss showing people that we humans are capable of powerful things besides routing a gazillion packets per second or blowing a lot of shit up. in some juvenile way, part of me wishes i could just get out of this whole taiko scene. move far far away from the group and never look back. because then i wouldn't feel so sad. this unreasonably overwhelming nostalgia of my taiko days past and my envy of the current levels of brilliance... it's a deadly mix for my psyche. and after i reread what i had written the following day, i wrote myself another e-mail entitled "whiny bastard": looking back, i just think i was jealous. and bitter. i just feel like i haven't taken any opportunities post-taiko to do something that would make people say, "dude, that was fucking amazing." and just as importantly, i miss being adored (cue the stone roses song). ah, the narcissistic truth comes out! so. anyways, on sunday, alan called and said that he'd get to my place in the afternoon, so having nothing to do, i decided to go to this taiko workshop held by eitetsu hayashi, a japanese taiko veteran. it was 3 hours long, and since i haven't really played in over a year, my arms got destroyed. even now, i have a hard time straightening out my arms... it just reminds me that i was in my best shape when i was playing. i wasn't buff or anything, but i just had a lot more physical stamina. DUDE. for warmups, eitetsu had us just bounce up and down. my balls were flopping around like mad, to the point where it got painful and i thought my scrotum would just pop open. what has happened to my testicles? i used to have no problems doing jumping jacks in my boxers, and now i'm getting all this weird shit going on (i.e. the nuthugger pants syndrome). am i getting old and just suffering from saggy balls? *blech* after i got out of the workshop at 4, i roamed around the stanford spring faire a bit, and then drove home. i hadn't eaten all day long, so alan, ting, peter and i went to miyake. and later on, i found out that peter hated miyake, and ting had just had sushi the day before, and i was like, "WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME?" and they said, "we're accomodating." hm. so when is it the right time to speak up about your dinner preferences? i mean, i was kind of craving miyake, but really, i think they should have spoken up. after my 25 pieces of sushi, i felt satisfied and a little sick, and we all watched _spiderman_. hm. i don't have anything that good to say about the movie, except that you kind of need to see it on the big screen to appreciate the scenes where he's swinging around new york. i'm not that familiar with the whole spiderman franchise (unlike the x-men or batman), so i just didn't have much of an emotional investment in the movie. and that kirsten dunst scene where she's wearing the wet shirt was way too brief; before it even registered that i was seeing her nipples, the scene was over. damn, i wish i could freeze-frame the movie. we were supposed to go clubbing afterwards, but peter and i totally wussed out, even though we had already changed into our asian pretty gear. we wound up going to blue chalk and having a drink or two. very chill. sunday was even more chill. it was just lunch, reading _time_ (the whole fucking thing) while listening to the celtics and lakers win. kobe bryant was amazing in the 4th quarter, and i just feel sad that the spurs should have won this series 4-0 if they hadn't choked so badly. poor poor tim duncan; he looked so dejected when he pulled his jersey over his face after airballing the final tying shot attempt. jay cooked some fab five-spice chicken, i watched the _alias_ season finale (vaughn!) followed by _sportscenter_, and then i got crazy over the dsc-f707. buy your wasabi shrimp chips and kimchi bowls here! i ordered 10 bags of the shrimp chips, which seemed 25% cheaper than buying them at black pearl, but then the shipping cost killed any potential savings. but at least i didn't have to leave the house, right? |