| 27 mar 2002 yuck. i've been sick as a fucking dog for the past two days. (coincidentally, mike has been sick for those two days, too... neat-o!) plus, my project lead sent an e-mail today saying that he was totally sick, too... hm. i bet i was the one who gave him the bug. for the past two days, i've been up for a total of nine hours. monday night, i was in bed for a whopping 21 hours. but i didn't get much rest, though, because the night was filled with feverishly crazy dreams of battling palestinians and jews. weird, huh? i hate fevers because my brain goes crazy, and as much as i tried to focus on other things, the dreams kept on going even while i was awake. so i had a runny nose, coughing, sore throat, chest pains, dizziness, and a ridiculous fever that made kept me shivering even though i was wrapped in bed by THREE layers of blankets, one of which was a thick cotton sleeping bag. my parents used to say that i could cure a fever by sweating it off, so i took advil and made a little burrito out of my blankets, and i sweat like crazy. i wore the same long-sleeve abercrombie t-shirt during the two days, and when i finally took it off this morning, i got a whiff of the inside... what a stench! man. this has got to the worst month in my life from a health perspective. first a two-week nervous breakdown, and one week later, a bad cold/flu thing. i wonder what my colleagues at work think of me... i must be pretty weak sauce. while i was laying in bed, i tried to think which was worse... a mental illness like i had a few weeks ago, or a physical illness like the one i was going through. i had always thought that mental afflictions were worse, because it distorts reality (i mean, what's scarier than stuff like hallucinations and stuff?) but i couldn't come up with a conclusion. both were equally shitty. friday night was fun, though. it was mike's birthday dinner at left of alberquerque's. as awkward as it might seem going to a birthday party of a friend i have only known for a few months, it was actually really comfortable because i've met most of his friends through our bowling nights. i was really atypical that night... loud, gregarious... it's been a long time since i've been like that, especially since i've been stuck in this apathetic depressed rut. before i went to the restaurant, i stopped by a-1 liquor store in palo alto... *sigh* old memories of buying alcohol when we were underage drinkers at stanford. i was looking for these little double-shot glasses of sauza tequila, but apparently they didn't carry them any more. so i got two mini-bottles of generic jose cuervo; one for mike, one for me. i made mike drink with me before we got any food. i think it kind of messed him up (he seemed to be dazed), and i got a nice empty-stomach buzz that lasted for half an hour. after that, i got geoff and nelson to drink with me. and then, dan and jimmy joined in. so overall, mike had five shots, and i think he was kind of fucked up. his eyes were glazed over, and he looked like rain man when he walked. i know a lot of people say you're supposed to get fucked up when you're celebrating your birthday, but after thinking about it, i think that's kind of wrong. i mean, the whole point is to enjoy it, right? while driving home (five shots for me didn't faze me after i got some food in my stomach) i felt kind of bad for being the primary instigator. i mean, being happily buzzed is one thing, but if the person gets pushed beyond that into the puking phase, then it's no longer a fun experience. so i wound up skipping the ski trip. alan told me it was going to be a day trip only, and seeing how i wasn't going to ski anyway, that would have meant that i would sit in a car for ten hours only to hang out at the ski lodge. so i stayed home all of sunday, and when the guys came back, we had a posh dinner at zibibbo. all i can say is... i still don't understand upscale dining. we came back and alan and i watched the last half of _cruel intentions_. it reminded me how cute selma blair is... i think it's her pouty look that totally turns me on. alan and i watched _blade II_ on sunday. a noon showing, no less... i don't think i've ever watched a movie that early in the day. we even got matinee prices! i really wanted to see it, but after reading reviews on how gory it was (dissections, etc.) i started having reservations against it. but it turned out it wasn't so bad. part of the plot still confuses me when i think about it. i was kind of pleased to see an actor from old hong kong kung-fu movies (donny yuen?) in the movie, although he only had one fight scene. and after i came back, jeremy called me up to ask me if i wanted to go up to the city to see the oscar's at annie's place. first i turned him down, but then, i realized that in a few weeks, i'm not going to be able to see him ever! (he and kate are moving to new hampshire.) so i called him back and told him to pick me up. the funny thing is that i find the oscar's incredibly boring. and whatever i think, jeremy's sentiments are amplified by ten times. when we came back, the car was silent. it was a bad time for the oscar's telecast to the longest ever. i think all of our brains were fried by how lame the show was. and what was gwyneth thinking? she wore this sheer top that showed off her rather smallish breasts, and what's worse, she was slouching! that made her boobs look extra-saggy, and it also made the sheer fabric bunch up in her stomach. it was like she was wearing granny underwear on her body. man. i started coughing during the oscar's, and while i was trying to go to sleep, my nose started running. and the next morning, i was sick. i don't know where the illness came from; seems to me it just blew me away from nowhere. i'm afraid to step on a scale. i haven't had solid food in two days, only jamba juice and gatorade. after everything that happened to me this month, it's like my body has a warrantee, and it's finally run out. dude. i'm only 26! |