| 25 jan 2002 last night, i went to see this asian american comedy troupe called 18 mighty mountain warriors. parts of it were kind of "huh?" and other parts were kind of funny. i dunno. i'm not very politically aware of most asian american issues, so maybe some of it flew over my head. but i especially enjoyed the hot dot vendor skit and the "population proportional basketball" skit, albeit the last one really didn't have any sociopolitical overtones. dude, after the show, my stomach started really hurting. so while we were standing outside waiting for the last people in our group to come up, i excused myself and dashed over to the bathroom. ugh. i had the runs. what the hell? did i eat something bad? the only thing i can remember was that my jack's spicy chicken sandwich had an inordinate amount of mayonnaise. *ponder* there was this really HOT girl sitting in front of mike at the theater. as i walked in (we were sitting in the back row) i got to survey the entire crowd, and i instantly recognized her. mike told me that he noticed me looking at her during the show... especially after she had taken off her coat to reveal a black tank top and nice, sexy shoulders. i'm such a sucker for skin. but, from first glance (and mike agrees with me), the girl looked hella high maintenance. i can't seem to stay away from being drawn in by that type. it's going to be my downfall, i tell you. but this girl... she had these awesome plastic-framed glasses that made her look like she'd be an animal in bed. yowza. in an odd way, she drew a reaction from me that was similar to the way another girl used to capivate me... letitia. oh well. i'm still in that phase of admiring from afar. still have no clue of how to approach someone randomly without seeming like a horny psycho. *shrug* so i headed home early last night so mike could pick me up in his fancy car. traffic along the 101 was not terrible, and soon enough, we made it to rita's place, where we switched cars. rita has one cool car. but it's what i found in her car that made my day. (well, aside from seeing the hot girl) basically, i looked inside before getting in, and there was this round thing with little dots on top. at first look, i thought it was red, so i asked, "is that a STRAWBERRY?" then i realized it was brownish, so i asked "is that a PASTRY?" it turned out to be a little stuffed HAMBURGER! how cute! i couldn't stop playing with it, and i found that it wasn't flimsy, but rather it was stiff. it turned out to be a cd case! even cuter! i love it when cute things have a useful function... it makes them not only cute but COOL. so now i want one. amazingly enough, if you do a google search on "hamburger cd case," it pops up on the first results! alas... they're out of stock right now, so i e-mailed them about when they might get in a new shipment. seems like they're popular. and rightfully so! oh. and i saw a cameltoe at the show. yup. there was on skit where this one girl, pearl, was wearing a black unitard or something and a red robe. at one point, she stood up, undid her robe, and there it was... a cameltoe. it was a little asymmetrical, leaning over to her left, and not very deep. and as she moved around more, it disappeared, so yeah, it wasn't lodged in very far. but still... i haven't seen a cameltoe since.. since... i can't remember. i wore my full asian outfit for the first time. i when i walked out, i was this huge black shadow stalking around the place. i imagine it must have looked kind of cool. but the thing is, my opinion of black outfits is that they're what you choose to wear if you have no personality, i.e. it's the most generic of all things you could put on. usually i like to be bold and wear something with strong colors... but i guess black is good if you feel like blending in and sinking into the background. after the show, we said goodbye to the other guys (ben, geoff, walter, nelson) and headed back to rita's place. it was only 9:30, so i had the feeling that mike and rita wanted to spend some more time together. fuck. i hate being the third wheel. they kept on saying that it was up to me whether i needed to head back home or not. i really didn't care that much, but i guess they thought that i needed to go back pretty soon. ugh. on the drive back, mike mentioned something about how i should bend the rules more, i.e. use my charms and such to get what i want rather than just following the most basic of rules. i said that i'm just too honest, and i really don't know how to work my way into good situations. i dunno. i'm just chicken. if i ever went to buy a car, i could never negotiate successfully... i'd just be too shy and trusting. it's a bad characteristic to have... i mean, i like the fact that i'm trusting and honest, but i just don't think it gets me as far as i could if i had an ounce of suaveness and sweet-talking skills. basically, this all stemmed from the fact that i was on the waiting list at the 18mmw show, and mike was telling me just to use my charm to persuade them to let me in. and i simply said, "i don't have any charm" and the whole time, all i did was whine that i was fucked and wouldn't be able to get in the show. as jay would say, "lame, dude." i really need to control my mood. i wonder how you do that. i think one of the first things i'm going to do when i get my iMac is rip all of my favorite peppy songs that i love and put them all onto one cd. it'll be like my personal musical jolt whenever i feel down. i was reading my freshman year journal the other day, and a lot of it is dedicated to what songs i was listening to that day... back then, music was a much bigger part of me, and a lot of my mood depended on two things: one was my contact with kristie, and the other was what songs i used to feed my mood. when i was down, i'd play something like nine inch nails "something i can never have," and i'd just wallow and make myself feel even worse. if i was happy, i'd pop in some soupdragons or something and enhance my mood. but anyways, this week has kind of sucked. despite the fact that i actually did some work on wednesday and felt really really good about myself. despite meeting up with people last night and heading up to the city (which is quite an adventure for me). but overall, i've just been really down lately, and i think it stems from the fact that i'm not getting any cool juicy drama. what do i want? it sounds kind of weird, but i want to get obssessed about beauty. kinda vague, but it's easy to tell that beauty is the equivalent term for a really rad girl. i just haven't met anyone that i can get crazy over, and like i've said before, ever since i was 4, i've almost been constantly in one crush or another. it inspires me, and it gives me strength and motivation. and those few times when there's been nobody (japan in 1995, and now), i've been pretty depressed. so there you go. i'm on a quest to find beauty. and then i'll go nuts. |