| 7 jan 2002 *sigh* first full work week in a long time. i had a really good weekend (first time in a while), but it ended kind of badly. friday night, i was waffling on whether or not to go to the company holiday party. i mean, the holidays are over! it's so anticlimactic. i tried calling a few of my friends, but they were all busy. and i wanted to go drinking with benboy, but he wasn't available, either, so... in the end i decided to go to the company event. dinner was rather uneventful... lots of old people with their wives and stuff, nothing for me to talk about. but bocce ball turned out to be quite fun. and quite challenging. it's like golf, except you throw the ball instead of hit it with a club. i played with a few of the founders, and it was good to see them in a fun atmosphere apart from the daily business side of things. oh, this weekend, i saw the perfect female ass. i know that there's more than one, but damn, this one had me drooling. perfect. the pants made this kind of reverse cameltoe formation in the back, and the curves just kept my eyes roving up and down the girl's contours. dude. i want some of that. last night, i had a dream about ken. and kristie. i don't remember the details. but also in my dreams was gwyneth! yup. lovely gwyneth paltrow, stalking around the place smoking a cigarette. i finally got some balls to walk up to her and ask for her autograph, and she signed my shirt after asking me what my name was. and then i woke up. :( saturday, before alan came over, i got my hair cut and stopped by banana republic for a belt. and also to seek out br girl. but she wasn't there. and neither was a cool belt, so i went to bloomingdale's and got a dkny belt that pleased me. amazing what the difference in labels means in a belt's price... donna karan belt were running over $90, but her lesser line ran for around $40. what's the difference besides the price? sheesh. i also got this beautiful reversible superwarm ecko sweatshirt. yeah. i should really shop buying skaterwear, but i can't help it still... too bad, though, because the zipper broke off that night, and i had to go back the next day to exchange it. alan rolled in around 5pm, and we played halo until we both got motion sickness. then, we headed off to miyake, where there was a horde of asian people (there were some cute girls there), and we decided that the wait would be too long. so we headed back to our place, met up with jay and jeremy, and i drove us over to korea house. it was a really good and satisying meal, as i hadn't eaten all day up until that point, and the infamously friendly grandma patron to the place stirred our bi bim baps and dol sot bops and repeatedly showed us how to make korean sushi with the nori strips. it was nice just having the guys around, shoot the shit and smelling each other's farts and judging the stinkiness with our reactions. when we went back to our place, i would just close my eyes and listen to these familiar voices that i loved and revel in the fact that my beloved friends were around me. it's such a good feeling, and all too rare these days with everyone being caught up in their own personal goings on. we stopped by for some pmt on castro, and i spied michael, this dude who interviewed me and then rejected me at caspian networks. i walked up to him and gave him a playful punch on the shoulder, and he gave me this surprised look. i wonder if he thinks that i'm upset about the rejection, and i wonder if he thought he'd never have to face me again. he was chatting with some big group of asian people outside, and i didn't talk to him again. hrmph. bastard. i could have been a good friend of his. alas. being in useless suburbia, we didn't do anything the rest of the night. we thought about bowling, but palo alto bowl was packed because they were having an "all you can bowl" night until 1am. so we just sat around the did nothing. i should ban the tv from being on when the guys are around, because all we end up doing is sit there, saying nothing and blankly watching the tv drone on and on. but we had been chatting all throughout the day, so i guess maybe we ran out of conversation. we caught up on each other's dramas and quests and problems, so that was good.. alan stayed over, and the next day, we headed up to stacks in redwood city with jeremy. fuck. i love stacks. i'm always stuffed after a meal there, and that's saying something, because i eat a lot, and places like hobee's just don't fill me up. we hit stanford shopping center after that, and we met up with peter, who was deathly tired from being post-call at the hospital all night. and then, the inevitable thing happened... i had to venture into banana republic again, looking for the cute cashier, with my friends watching me. i was really nervous about making a fool out of myself in front of my friends. but as it turned out, she wasn't there. i think she's gone forever, probably some student who was just working there for the holidays. alan drew up some game plans for me to follow about how to make smalltalk and put her in my comfort zone. but i guess we'll never see if his carefully thought-out plans would have worked. i love my friends. so spending all this time with them really made me miss our old days back at school, when we'd hang out practically every day. i even felt guilty when i told them that one of my new year's resolutions is to find more friends, because it sounded like they weren't good enough for me. they are. it's just that i don't see enough of them, and what's more, they can't provide me the social contacts so that i can find a woman. but then the weekend started to suck. basically, two of my top single friend prospects are on the verge of not being single any more. i really had high hopes of hanging out with them more this year, but if they venture into their relationships, that's going to really put a damper on their free time. and yes, i *am* being a selfish bitch. it reminds me of back in freshman year, when we had this big clique of guys, and as we each ventured into our girlfriend phases, the ones left behind would hold some inevitable resentment that their buddies were in a sense taken away from them. so that really bugged me. i dunno. it really is a self-centered way of looking at things, and i really am glad for them, because that's what i want for myself in the future, and i would expect people to be glad for me, too, rather than get all grumbly and shit about the fact that my time would be occupied by someone new. and then stanford basketball lost to cal. fuckers. stanford couldn't hit its 3's, and what's worse, they couldn't hit their own fucking free throws. our point guards couldn't even dribble up without getting the ball stole, so it was a horrible game for us, and i was so nervous and upset during the game that i basically chewed off all my nails. damn. i'm never confident when we play, because we fuck up so many times. arrgh. so cal beat us in the first time in like 11 tries. they rushed the court afterwards (the game was played at cal), and i just rolled my eyes in disgust because it's not like we rush the court when we beat them. we're better than that. so they should stop being lame and just chill out. it's just one game. can you tell i'm bitter? i've got the monday blues. blah. |