To be honest with you I don't think he was even worth the time it took for his mom to get lucky.
Yes, I am aware this is 'fake', but I still say it's a chance to rip on him (and advertise my favorite OS, which is apparently not Windows). When you look at it, he probably would say these very words. So, let the ripping games begin.
The 'Fake' Article
Basically in this article, Bill is stating everything that is untrue about Linux. And to top that off he lost one of his programmers to a Linux company. For those of you who are pressed for time reading this board, let me do a few couple of examples, with my counterspeeches in bold:
"Before KDE and GNOME, Linux was considered a server OS, and now, Linux has capture 5.6 percent of the desktop market. While 5 percent is not a threatning number to Microsoft, it is important to remember that Linux is sitting on more desktops than MacOS at this point. MacOS never really concerned me very much, but this should give everyone some perspective. It is also important to consider that Linux is still a "fad" at this time, and that number will probably drop back to less than one percent. "
Oh no, my friend Bill. Try a good 8.3%, that's still climbing. And y'know what else? Linux is the official world standard for running a web server, and not your fucking NT Server Workshop. Gee, maybe it's because your Server Workshop is the equivalent of handing my carkeys over to a carjacker who had no intention of stealing my car in the first place(because it's a piece of shit), but will now since I just made it a bit easier for him.
"Why will it drop? Finite resources. Linux prides itself on the "open source" model, which counts on programmers around the world contributing to a product. In theory, the idea of free labor is wonderful. In reality, there just are not that many skilled programmers willing to work for free."
Oh no, dear Bill. What are you smoking? I want to stay away from it, and keep you on it so it kills your company. Linux already supports Plug N' Play, and has default drivers that actually work. What about WinME? Oh yeah. What drivers?Sweet, WinME, I can do whatever the hell I want to and don't need to reboot everytime I install something cause it can auto-configure itself. The only problem is that I can't get any of my hardware to work unless my computer came with your dipshit OS, like from Gateway, or Dell computers (officially renamed to Gaywait and Hell, by me. All disagreers shall be left alone for the err of your ways to catch up to you.). As far as limited resources...uh, guy...Linux can do 3 times the shit your OS can, with half the effort and usage of system resources, and can run a secure server.
"The open source zealots always try to suggest that there are thousands of talented coders just lying about waiting for a good project to work on. Any one that has programmed professionally knows that at the end of a long day of coding, the last thing you want to do is go home and program more for free. "
Gee, CD would be one of those talented coders waiting for a good project to work on. And he programs for free (for me anyway). Bill, I know people who dream in binary coding...
"How can anyone be productive when one has to expend energy to argue the fundamentals of such artificial concepts as "Free Software" and "Open Source?""
Production doesn't have to come down to time = money = power. You're just a powermad lunatic wanting to enslave the world through its own idiocy and limit them to the knowledge only within your OS. Production in Free software and open source = EDUCATING PEOPLE. Seeing how shit WORKS. So that when shit breaks down, they know the fix. Educating people and showing people how the gears turn inspires those same people to come up with great ideas, many of which work for you, you dumbfuck.
"Threefold duplication of effort is, as you can see, Linux's answer to everything. Do not forget that they are doing all this work on finite resources, still under the false impression that this will build a better GUI. "
Ah how soon you forget the days of when you first created Windows on those same 'finite' resources. And how dumb thou mayest be when forgetting that three times the effort = three times the output. Threefold duplication? Ha...obviously you have never seen a Linux machine run.
"Since nothing ever really gets accomplished in the Linux market, the poor zealots need to celebrate every small victory."
Again...official standard in running a server...Plug N' Play Support...Default drivers that actually work...networking interface with 3 times the security than your dipshit networking. Hardware capabilities being fully utilized by the OS...whereas yours is more software than anything else, probably explaining why there's so much goddamned trouble. Software can be fucked up and overlooked. Fucked up hardware doesn't work, period.
"This is a community of self- proclaimed "hackers" that are still celebrating the successful reverse engineering of those silly CueCat scanners. Therefore, as soon as a company mentions Linux in a positive way, regardless of how insignificant, the slashdot.org crowd throws a virtual equivalent of Mardi Gras. "
Hey, don't diss the CueCat's! And hackers know their shit better than you ever will. Otherwise your OS wouldn't be so suseptible to all 30 million viruses directed at it. At least Linux comes with its own anti-virus, depending on what distro you get. (distro=distribution for those behind in the net lingo) Notice those company employees cheer too and throw a party like Mardi Gras. It's because now they don't have to worry about system crashes while working on something important.
"the creation of HelixCode, a company that has an income of zero dollars, and the official announcement of GNOME support by Sun Microsystems. In the former case, everyone will gasp when HelixCode goes away (after all, didn't Mr. Raymond say that Open Source could be profitable?), and in the later, everyone forgets immediately how they felt about Sun's handling of Java last year. Despite this, Mardi Gras rages on. "
HelixCode is probably either run by idiots or is a nonprofit company and I prefer to believe the latter. Sun Microsystems supports something you don't have. Oh boo fucking hoo. Hey, didn't you try to takeover Java and claim it as yours by writing a new type of Java that was completely incompatible with Sun's version, and your version did jack shit? Oh gee...maybe that's why you lost $500 billion last year in that lawsuit by Sun...oops.
"Years ago, the "problem" with Linux was a lack of hardware drivers. Today, that problem still exists, and even though many people seem to think otherwise, I've yet to hear reports of a working, let alone robust DVD player for this "desktop" operating system. "
No the problem was that only computer techs wanted to learn the OS. There's always been drivers. And your sources obviously aren't paid enough because Linux does support DVD now. Funny, it works better than yours. How do I know? Mine actually runs without claiming it did an illegal operation so it's gotta shut down.
"I can not pretend that the Linux kernel has not improved, but it has not improved at the rate that Torvalds and his bunch of merry men pretend it has, and that's largely due to companies that will not release hardware programming information. They aren't interested in Open Source, and they don't want to be troubled by it. "
And notice those same companies are now supporting Linux because they want to be kept in business. Gee, looks like the merry men strike again.
"Want more concrete examples? At LinuxWorld in San Jose only a few months ago, SGI had to find a way to explain how Linux is great while they showed off their IRIX technology. The magician they brought helped, I hear. Michael Dell can not stop babbling about this exciting new Linux while meanwhile, Microsoft operating systems power the computers that keep his company afloat. "
Well if you knew nothing about quantum physics, how in the hell would you explain that? By the way, I hear Dell's going Linux too. -insert the Twilight Zone music here-
"It is always good, in a truely Machiavellian sense, to pay lip service to industry buzzwords like "Linux", but most companies will not bet their payrolls on it when push comes to shove. That's why we avoid future bad press in our standard manner; when we announced that we would port Internet Explorer to Solaris, we always used the term "Unix" in our press releases, to give Microsoft a safety buffer. I think that's wiser in the long run. "
That's because most companies don't have the money to hire a guy to come in and educate everyone on how to use the OS, and they're not coming to you for a damn loan. Remember Bill, people are stupid. You play on this fact very well with Winblows. By the way, Unix is your competition too, and is part of the Linux OS. Oh, and did you know Linux supports 99% of your shit? Yeah. They figured they could undo the brainwashing you did by doing that.
"Generally speaking, if you were to ask a Linux user the benefits of Linux they will not tell you about its merits, but rather Windows's flaws"
That would be because every flaw that Windows has, Linux excels on. But they refer to the Windows flaws so that the Pro-Windows person can't use the statement as a return fire comment along the lines of "Well Windows can do that too Just...not...very...well.....and...stable...".
"In years past, we've discussed various ways to stop the Linux wave; we have considered everything from FUD to mud slinging to benchmarks to proprietary "standards" to force them down. The next step is usually what the Linux community refers to as "embrace and extend," where we make our own proprietary version of Linux, brand it with our trademark, and improve it until people would rather use our flavor than any other. At that point, we can lock everyone else out of the market. "
All of which would get your precious company split up about 500 ways to China and back and if you didn't do it you'd be arrested for holding a monopoly and resisting a federal court order. OOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!
"Why on earth would Microsoft want to embrace this virtual kindergarten? "
So your dumbass pre-school programmers can take notes.
"I think that sooner or later, these Linux fools will self-destruct without our influence. "
What? Are you going to hunt us all down and implant Windows operated time bombs in us? I think they wouldn't work. Apparently one of your explosion drivers caused an error default in some unpronouncable DLL file.
"We'll see who has the Mardi Gras celebration then. In the meantime, I hope they enjoy their 5.6 percent of the desktop. It won't last. "
With Linus Torvalds as the host and enough champagne to get the entire southern half of the US smashed. WOOHOO!! And you're right. That 5.6% won't last. It'll become 11.2%, and then 22.4%, then 44.8%. And then you won't have to worry about that government split-up order.
Again, I am aware that the whole concept was fake, but still, I like bashing Bill Gates and advertising Linux. Someone's gotta do it.