SPEAKING IN TONGUES: Or How to "impress" your loved ones with your language skills





	“Hey Talon?”
	Talon glanced down into the floor where Edgewater lay idly staring at the ceiling. “Yes?”
	“Swordy... He speaks Swedish doesn’t he?”
	Talon negligently shrugged her shoulders and turned back to the fantasy novel propped open in front of her. “I suppose.”
	“Don’t you think it would be cool to, you know, learn some Swedish stuff and surprise him?”
	“Why?”
	“I dunno. I just thought it might be fun.”
	“We do have a phrase book, you can look something up in that you think might be appropriate.”
 	Edgewater rolled to her feet. “I’ll do that, be back in a moment!”
	Talon nodded absently, once more engrossed in her book, feet swinging idly in the air over her back as she lay propped 
up on her stomach. She hadn’t gotten far, however, when Edgewater reappeared.
	“Talon,” She whined, “I can’t pronounce this stuff! Help!”
	Talon sighed and reluctantly laid her book aside. Looking up to find Edgewater looking at her with wide pleading eyes 
and clutching a Swedish phrase book. “You know you look like Duo when you do that.”
	Edgewater huffed and plopped herself on the edge of the bed. “Do not,” She thrust the book under Talon’s nose, 
“Here, help.”
	Talon reluctantly took the book and flipped through the pages, pausing to read the pronunciation guide at the beginning. 
“So, what do you want to say?”
	“I don’t care. Anything.”
	“Anything, hmm?” If Edgewater hadn’t let her attention wander back to the ceiling, she might have noticed the 
mischievous twinkle in Talon’s eyes, and rethought her plan, but as it was she remained oblivious. 
	“I’m ready now, tell me something!”
	“All right then,” Talon eyes flickered over the pages of the book, looking for something to pass along to her lovemate. 
“Var är uttaget för rakapparaten.”
	Edgewater blinked. “Var are utt for rakawhat? Don’t they have anything easier in there?”
 	Talon looked severely back at Edgewater, “Do you want my help or not?”
	Edgewater sighed, “Yes,” she admitted 
reluctantly.
	“Ok then, try again.”
	Eventually, Edgewater was able to get the phrase out without tripping over her own tongue and was feeling quite proud 
of herself. “Give me another one! This is easy!”
	“Are you sure?”
	“Yes!”
	“Ok, you asked for it... Jag sukulle vilja ha en efterrätt med vispgrädde.”
	Edgewater closed her eyes and took a deep 
breath and after several attempted managed to get through this phrase as well. She repeated it and her first phrase 
several times to get them set before opening her eyes and turning to Talon. “One more!” she pleaded. 
	Talon flipped through several more pages of the phrase book before her eyes landed on something else she liked. 
“This is the last one,” she warned.
	Edgewater nodded eagerly.
	“Ok, Kan jag få pengarna tillbaka.”
	Edgewater repeated the phrase quietly to herself a few times before nodding firmly, “I’ve got it! Now I just have to 
wait for Swordeye to get home.”
	“You’re absolutely sure you want to do this?”
	Edgewater nodded enthusiastically. “You bet! Swordy will be so surprised.”
	Talon rolled her eyes. “Oh, he’ll be surprised all right...”

	When Swordeye returned, Edgewater was ready. “Var är uttaget för rakapparaten!” she greeted him cheerily. 
Swordeye froze for a moment. He looked at Edgewater who beamed at him happily. Seeing no help there, he 
searched out Talon with his eyes and found her watching with a barely contained smirk on her face. Finally 
deciding that he had misheard the whole thing, Swordeye smiled shyly at Edgewater and hoped that whatever he 
had misheard hadn’t been that important. Edgewater trailed after him as he headed toward the threesome’s 
bedroom. “Jag sukulle vilja ha en efterrätt med vispgrädde,” she called after him.
	Swordeye glanced back at Edgewater. “I’ll remember that,” he commented under his breath. 
	Edgewater blinked, that wasn’t exactly the response she was looking for, but it would do. After all, Swordy meant 
that he would remember the efforts she went through to learn these important phrases, right?
	Later the three were curled up together in their blankets after wearing themselves out with a little... ‘recreational 
activity’. Edgewater sighed contentedly against Swordeye’s chest. “Kan jag få pengarna tillbaka,” she murmered 
huskily. 
	Swordeye’s eyes flew open in horror. “What?” Talon curled tighter and was trying to muffle her laughter in the 
blankets. 
	Edgewater blinked at her pair of insane lovers. “Was it something I said?”





According to the phrase book....

Var är uttaget för rakapparaten: Where’s the shaver socket
Jag sukulle vilja ha en efterrätt med vispgrädde: I’d like a dessert please with whipped cream
Kan jag få pengarna tillbaka:Could I have a refund