The Visitor

 

We didn’t get many visitors in our ward. And when people did, none of my “circle” ever got any. So, when I got one, it was a surprise. Even to me. I didn’t really think there were many people who would take time out of their busy schedules to check on me. They left that up to the nurses.

 

“I wonder who it is,” Monica said.

 

“Probably that Carter person you always talk about,” Bonnie surmised.

 

Jeanette rolled her eyes. “He’s dead,” she reminded everyone bluntly.

 

I cringed beside myself. I hated be reminded of Carter’s death, which leads us in a circle to how I got here. But if you don’t know that already, I pity you.

 

“Sorry,” Jeanette said in a softer tone, catching eye of my reaction. There’s not much that girl doesn’t see. “I forget sometimes.”

 

I nodded. “It’s okay.”

 

“I bet its someone who’s going to get you out of here,” Gina growled, puffing on her seventh cigarette of the day. That was incredible. Usually she was on her second package or trying to get them off us by now.

 

“Ohhh, maybe you’re right!” Bonnie exclaimed. “Run if you have the chance,” she advised me.

 

“Yeah, get the hell out of here,” Jeanette added, dropping her usual gise of the most levelheaded one of all.

 

I shrugged. “We’ll see,” I said, then followed the nurse into the visiting room. There was Luka Kovac, practically the last person I expected to see.

 

“Hi,” he said shyly. I nodded and sat down in one of the overstuffed chairs. He copied the action. I pulled out a cigarette and lit it.

 

“How are you?” I asked, trying to get a conversation going.

 

“Fine. Are you okay here?”

 

“As well as I might be, considering the circumstances. How is the County crew?” Why did I call everyone at County the County crew? It’s so blasé.

 

“Everyone’s fine. They’re all worried about you.”

 

“Are they?” 

 

“Yes.” That’s all he said. I wondered what he really meant. He always had that depressed look upon his face. I wondered about that too. He was close with Abby; maybe I’d have to call her up soon. Imagine that. Getting a call from your former co-worker, who’s locked up in the nut house. “Hi Abby, it’s Lucy. Yeah. I’m mentally unstable and I’m giving you a call. Oh don’t worry; I won’t hunt you down... Oh, one of my schizo friends broke out... And I told them your address. By the by how are you and Luka...” Heh, heh, I kill myself.

 

Anyway, back to Luka.

 

“Is this a new habit you have?” he asked suddenly.

 

I glanced at him. “What?” God, that accent is so sexy.

 

“Smoking.”

 

“Oh, right.” I waved the cigarette around in the air for dramatic effect. “Yeah, I suppose so.” He’s so sexy.

 

“You know it’s bad for you,” he said. I wonder what it would take me to get him in bed...

 

“You think this is bad, you should see Gina. She puffs close to five packs a day. Hell, I’d love to see a cross of HER lungs!” I smiled and took another puff on the cigarette. They’re comforting things, cigarettes. Maybe the reason you get addicted to them is because they become your best friend.

 

“That doesn’t make it right. You’ll get sick.”  

 

“I know, I am a doctor.” I am. I’m a schizo doctor! My God, I had never though of it like that! It was really funny. I started to giggle then my laughter got louder. It became twisted. Cold, hard, and best of all, evil. I schizophrenic’s laugh – the best thing about my existence.

 

Luka stared at me and when he could compose himself said, “What is so funny?”

 

“I’m a doctor and I’m locked up! Isn’t that a little amusing?”

 

“Um, sure.” He must have thought I had really lost it. “I must go,” he said, getting up. “I’ll tell Kerry you’re doing well.”

 

Yeah, sure you will. My ass. “Thanks for coming by.” We got up and went out separate ways.

 

Back in the common room, Monica and Jeanette crowded me.

 

“Who was it?” Monica exclaimed.

 

“A co-worker.”

 

“Well, obviously,” Jeanette said superfluously and rolled her eyes.

 

“Luka Kovac,” I added.

 

“Oh, a boyfriend?” Monica exclaimed again, even louder. A couple sociopaths glanced our way, and sleep-deprived depressives lifted their weary eyes to us.             

 

“Shhh! Evgeny’s in the middle of his program,” Bonnie snapped snarling at us.

 

“Bah,” Jeanette said waving her hand in a Dogbert-like manner.

 

“Is he?” Monica said with urgency in her voice.

 

I shook my head. “No. I told you, he’s a co-worker.”

 

“Sure,” Jeanette muttered, slouching to the couch to watch the rest of the ISU Grand Prix with Bonnie.

 

I left the common room and caught site of Luka, talking to a nurse.

 

“What did you think Doctor Kovac?” she said. Her name was Betty (get it? Nurse Betty. Har Har, I’m still killing myself!)

 

“Check her meds,” was all he said. He turned to leave and caught sight of me.

 

I tried to say something, but all my words froze in my throat.

 

“I’m sorry Lucy,” he said and left. I didn’t see him for the rest of my internment at the hospital.