| Quotes! |
| "Being happy doesn't mean everything's perfect. It means you've decided to see beyond the imperfections." "Even if there is nothing to laugh about, laugh on credit." "Duct tape is like the force -- there is a light and a dark side and it holds the universe together." "Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyways." "Life on Earth is expensive, but it does include a free trip around the sun once every year" f vegetable oil is made of vegetables, what is baby oil made of? No guts, no glory, no brain, same story. Money is the root of all evil, and a man needs roots. If quitters never win, and winners never quit, then who is the fool who said "Quit while you're ahead"? If everything is going well, you don't know what the hell is going on. One good turn gets most of the blankets. It is better to be looked over than overlooked. There are three kinds of people -- those who can count and those who can't. It is not what a teenager knows that bothers his parents, it is how he found out. How long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom door you're on. Birthdays are good for you; the more you have, the longer you live. Happiness comes through doors you didn't even know you left open. Ever notice that the people who are late are often much jollier than the people who have to wait for them? If Walmart is lowering prices every day, how come nothing is free yet? Some mistakes are too much fun to only make once. We could learn a lot from crayons: some are sharp, some are pretty, some are dull, some have weird names, and all are different colors....but they all exist very nicely in the same box. A truly happy person is one who can enjoy the scenery on a detour Good judgment comes from bad experience and a lot of that comes from bad judgment. The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it back in your pocket. A closed mouth gathers no foot. I didn't say it was your fault. I said I was going to blame you. Diplomacy is the art of saying "good doggie" while looking for a bigger stick. Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes. If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends? The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard. Don't be irreplaceable; if you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted. |