Jerry:Tonight on the Jerry Springer show we have a particularly intresting episode! Miyamoto is here to finally confess something to her daughter, Jessie. So everyone please put your hands together for Miyamoto!
Jerry: Okay, now Miyamoto you're here to talk about someone aren't you?
Miyamoto: yes
Jerry: And what is this other persons name?
Miyamoto:James
*the croud SQUEALS with delight*
Jerry:Okay, okay, well James, is actually here tonight...
*the crowd SQUEALS once more.*
Jerry: but first we have a surprise for you Miyamoto, because as it happens there is someone else here to see YOU! So let's bring out... Cassidy!
Miyamoto: What the HELL!!!
(Miyamoto happens to hate Cassidy too)
Out of nowhere Miyamoto pulls out a paper fan. Cassidy reaches for the table. Out of the shadows Mondo appears.
Mondo: Wait everybody wait!
Jerry: Yes, everybody let's just calm down for a moment here. First tell us why you're here Cassidy.
Cassidy: Because I saw Miyamoto and Mondo making out at Team Rocket Head Quarters!
*the crowd goes absolutely INSANE.*
Mondo: That's a lie! I was home watching Yu-gi-oh!
Jerry:(raising his hands) Hold on, hold on, I'm missing the problem here... what exacly IS the problem Cassidy?
Cassidy: I've recently been taking part in a sexual relationship with Jessie who has recently become engaged to Mondo.
*the crowd hollers, screams and whoops in an orchestra of orgasmic excitemebt.*
Miyamoto: OH MY GOD!! with my daughter?!? are you seriouse?!? what the *bleep* is wrong with you?!?
*Jerry cuts in*
Jerry:Okay, okay. Well why don't we bring Jessie out here because Miyamoto had something that she needed to tell her anyway about... James that's right!
Jessie: (enters onto stage and saunters over toward Miya) Whats the deal? I saw you outside getting it on with James! You know I'm how I feel about James!.
Mondo:What about respect for MY feeling!
Cassidy:Don't worry baby, you don't need any of them now that you have me.
*again the crowd SQUEALS.*
Mondo: Oh my God! Are you SICK!!
*Mondo runs across the room and wraps his arms around Miyamoto tightly*
Mondo:Miyamoto take me away from all of this!
Miyamoto:You see? That's the thing... I'm...well, I'm married...
*the crowd does it a bit*
Mondo: Married?
*Miyamoto nods.*
Mondo:who the hell are you married to? When... when did this happen? I don't understand!
Miyamoto: The other day. In Vegas. I'm married to James.
Jessie:(screams) WHAT?!?\
Jerry:(grins widely, makes an enquiry) so.... did you have a nice wedding night?
James:(stepping back out onto center stage) Wel we had sex 14 times if that's what you mean.
*crowd squeals.*
Jerry: Okay, okay. So let me get this all straight... Miyamoto is married to James who Jessie has secretly been in love with for years and years. Now Jessie has recently become engaged to Mondo who was recently spetted kissing Miyamoto in the Team Rocket HQ. Now on top of this Cassidy has just admitted to being in a sexual relationship with Jessie.
James:That's right Jerry.
Jerry:(looking sternly into the camera) It is times like these that one has to wonder, whether or not these people are aware that they are quite clinkically insane. Perhaps we should be spending more on psychiatiric health funds in this country, perhaps we should just bad Vegas to cut down on impulse marriages. Perhaps I should get a new job. Thanks for watching folks it's been great but for now.... its goodnight.
*Queue cheesy background music and fade to black.*