(click on the picture for a larger version - I don't see why you'd want to though)

  The mock disaster was held this year on a gloomy May 4 morning for over 1300 grade 11 students all around the county.  As always, the mock disaster proved to be ultra-realistic, in fact, as the headline says, it was all too real for some.

   Personally, the mock disaster was only about a quarter fun.  Don't let anybody fool you, being in the mock disaster is an unnerving experience.  Even with my eyes closed the entire time, I felt as though I was watching my own death as if it was on TV or something.  I mean, they had background music and everything, it was beyond real ... it passed into surreal.  I distinctly remember hearing the emergency crew all around me, saying things like, "He's dead too ... they're all dead."  It's impossible to hear that being said about you and not have it touch something deep inside of you.

   After being taken off of the car I waited on the ground as they took out the bright yellow blanket and placed it over me, officially prouncing me "dead".  I laid under that blanket for what seemed like forever until finally I felt myself being lifted into the hearst and driven away.  You know, you talk about it, and it sounds pretty cool, but believe me, it's not.  It's downright scary when you think about it.  It was a very moving experience for me ... and my eyes were closed.

   The experience gave me quite a bit to think about.  People have asked me what went through my mind during those minutes when I was trying to think about anything other than what was going on.  Mainly, I thought about my friends.  I thought about what would happen if the situation was real.  Would they really be screaming that loud?  If the picture in the newspaper was real, would they be shocked?  Upset?  Depressed?  Would they get over me? 

   I thought about what I'd do if it were someone I really cared about.  How would I be able to live with it?  I decided quite quickly that it wouldn't be very well.  I don't think I'd do very well if something like that happened to somebody I cared about.

   I thought about people like Amanda, people I've grown to really care about.  I thought vaguely of Sarah, wondering if she'd be upset in the least.  I realized that all of the other actors had screamed out my name during the scene, except for Melanie, who never mentioned me.  I thought about Liv, and realized that I wanted nothing more at the moment than to give her a big hug and thank her for becoming such an awesome new friend.  I thought about Cheryl sitting there in the crowd, and Jen Wilkie, and Ryan, and the others.  I thought about Janna and Taylor up there watching me, wondering how everybody felt.

   I'm sure the cast members of Club 52 noticed that I handed out considerably more hugs to everyone than usual that night.  Your views on a lot of things change after something like that.  You realize that the best reason to give hugs is because you never want to regret letting somebody know that you love them.  I won't let that happen to me.