Early Stuff page2
Dead End

Space, twisted
Into my maze
Sweet, purple haze
number unlisted

Grace, out of reach
Into my maze
Sweet, soft, white haze
smattered with bleach

Pace, swiftly gone
Into my maze
Sweet, dark blue haze
long before dawn

Internal structure
External bewilderment
Into my maze
you are sent
to find
me




Blasphemy


Into my courtyard
Out of my keep
Demonstrate noisily how loud you sleep

Into my meadow
Out of my wood
Burn it up quickly, scorch it up good

Tangle the tresses
Murder the dead
Shattered all over, your dull copper head

Put out the sun
Melt down the moon
What is known should be unlearned just as soon

Won't stop the blasphemy
Barretor
Won't stop the blasphemy
Here, take
Detune my frequency
Fog up my window
And turn off my lights




Thanks For Asking

Bash it into my skull
Thanks, I needed that
Take it and smash it twice
One for difference
Two for idiocy

Let's all paint him yellow
Wash his pain away
Take it take it take it (he can)
Loop, doesn't matter, loop
Lather, rinse, repeat, rinse

Three times now
(Three for not wanting your girlfriend)
You know I want it
I want it as much as I want
Your beautiful trance-inducing witch

I'm already burning
Don't make the flames hotter
Don't bash it in
Four times
(Four for entirely disliking you)

I can't feel anymore
Was that a fifth?
(Five for superficially liking you)
Drown, little demon, drown me
Maybe I'll go (away)

Yes, I am just wonderful
Thanks for asking
You beligerent idiot






Painkiller
(9/15/99)

The ultimate painkiller
is too good for me to have.
The ultimate painkiller
freezes my insides.
She makes me forget everything
She makes me lose control.
Without her I am nothing
but an empty painful life.

The ultimate painkiller
doesn't love me anymore.
The ultimate painkiller
Caused more pain than She fought.
She ceased to let me remain sane
She stopped all existence.
Her absence gave me nothing
escept her presence that I fought.

Ms. Killer doesn't understand
She probably never will
But I ask her to please find another
Helpless soul to kill



Useless/Hopeless

On the floor
Writhing
Snake
Deep in the jungle
Of my eyes

On the floor
Screaming
Blood
Deep in the haunted house
Of my mind

On the floor
Burning
Flames
Deep in the hell
Of my soul

In the ground
Rotting
Corpse
Deep in the graveyard
Of my heart




A Thin Line Between Love And Hate
(6/19/99)

Why is it when I see your face
I want to fall asleep
And dream about you all night long
A dream so very deep?

Why is it when I see your eyes
I do not understand
Why I so want to touch your cheek
And gently hold your hand?

Why is it when I see your smile
It makes me want to cry
This tears of sadness, love, and joy
That make me want to die?

Why is it when I think of you
My brain just falls apart
And I can think with nothing else
Except my broken heart?




Untitled
(6/10/99)

Though this is beyond the pale
All else beyond you
Pales in comparison
And although you're beyond my grasp
I do turn pale
When I lay my eyes on you

Though having you is a dream
I dream of the day when
I have your affection
And although you have no feelings toward me
You are still my dream
A forbidden fantasy

Though all hope seems lost
I refuse to lose hope
I will hope
For your lost heart
To turn towards me
And scream "I need you"

Though I am an not sure if I love you
I want you to know
That I want to be loved
For I know I'm confused
In this world of love
This tangled web of which I will never escape




Her Favorite Sinner
(2/5/99)

So why did you put me here?
Why did you make me the way that I am?
So why did you put her here?
Why did you make her the way that she is?

To hurt me?
To hate me?

And I clasp my hands in thanks to you
For all the good that you didn't do                                 
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updated 8/5/01
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