Dedication to my Grandfather

 

I remember you,

The way you laughed and smiled

Even through your tribulations.

I remember stories told about you

And how they built you up

You were my friend,

you were my family.

 

I remember your soft skin,

Even in the casket I made that remark.

You looked so peaceful, so relaxed.

I could only wonder where you were going

And how you were getting there.

 

Even in death you pulled me out of the darkness

How, is still a question on my mind.

Yet I am falling again grandpa,

I need your guidance, your stories, your gifts.

You always cared for me,

I read it in your eyes.

I loved you grandpa,

yet I never shed a tear for you.

You helped me, and I can no longer help you.

 

Grandpa Yang Tong, you will be remembered

In mind, heart, and spirit.

Just never forget me.

 

 

 

 

Who is Me

 

I was born to this world

A welcomed child in warm hearts.

A determined purpose young at age,

Sacrificing myself for others happiness.

 

Time wound down as hearts closed,

Soon abandoned.

Friends revealed how beautiful backs can be.

Walking on, backs turned, arms folded, hearts closed.

 

I walk on alone.

Those that would have open arms and hearts

demonstrated how cold the world is.

Left alone,

Admitting it or not,

at such a young age.

 

I walked this world alone.

Always at fault.

Still the one to screw up,

but I've found people

Who have stared me in the eye

As their arms folded around me

 

These people turned me from death.

Yet I see how true their hearts are,

Now in pain once more.

Stabbed, kicked, punched, bruised,

Beaten, battered, bloody,

Coughing blood up from every wound inflicted.

 

Never healing,

Inflicted too deep to be aided.

Stabbed like Caesar

And they my Senate.

Still cold, Still lonely...

 

I give myself up to this world,

I just give up…

 

 

 

Conjurer

 

I have built these walls

I have constructed this maze

I placed myself in the middle

with the chest of secrets

doors open and they close

there are no entrances to this labyrinth

there are no exits either

have you passed the valley of death,

the river of flame

have you beaten back the beast of my mind

to garner the power to leap the labyrinth wall

and enter the maze of the psyche

 

I stand in the middle

with the chest of secrets

and I stare at myself

who holds the key to open it

and you, who gave me strength

when I had none

you who stood beside me

as we waded through the river

you who took deadly blows

for me to slay those beasts

and now, you, who holds my hand

as I turn that key......

 

do you love me

 

 

Just Walk Away

 

I sit on the edge

feet dangling like dandelions

I watch this world,

in it's beauty

I see where I came from

craving that life once more

 

I hear a voice

"just walk away"

sounds so familiar

so comforting

so warm

 

as I stand to take my leave

the world I once loved

turns to death

black

crumbling

falling

 

I turn

to see my eyes

staring through me

as all eyes have done

you do not know this life

 

I walk toward myself

vanish

like a mist

I’ll never exist

until that day

my world is reborn

and I with it

 

listening as lips part

"just walk away”,

just walk away...