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i-weekly No 230 28 Mar-4 Apr 2002
(Part of Chinese text copied from i-weekly online)

（陈汉玮：汉/黄碧仁：碧）

好男人VS好女人

一个好男人应具备的条件是……？
汉：无论是好男人还是好女人，对工作、家庭与朋友的责任感是最重要的。此外还要会尊重别人以及孝顺父母，也得知道自己是为什么而活，这样才会被旁人所尊重。

那么一位好女人又应该是怎么样呢？
碧：像我这样咯！哈哈！
汉：我想21世纪的好女人要有自己的想法与个性，别完全被男人牵着鼻子走。她还得满足另一半的需要，不过大家不要想歪，这其中还包括满足对方的食欲，例如让老公回到家能吃到一顿好吃的饭菜。
碧：那她不是一定得是个家庭主妇吗？
汉：不一定，主要是要入得厨房，出得厅堂。两人同住时难免会对彼此的生活习惯有些小怨言，例如不满对方在睡觉时打鼾；但在外头时就要尊重对方。
碧：对，家里无论发生什么事，都不该当众数落对方。

根据两人对彼此的了解，你们觉得对方是个好男人或是好女人吗？
汉：碧仁肯定是好女人，因为她符合了我最重视的条件，即有很强的责任感。但让我较难接受的，是她倔强的个性。我很尊重她的原则性，但她有时会明知道自己错了，却坚持不妥协。
碧：汉玮是个很孝顺的人。他一有空就会回家，也很疼爱妈妈；但还不知道他婚后会如何……。
汉：不一定要在婚后才看得出啊。好男人也会从工作与对朋友中表现出来，难道好男人只适用于为人老公吗？
碧：当然不是如此，但从已婚男人如何对待家庭来看，更能判断他是不是个好男人。但汉玮确实是个好人，无论是当老公或是好友，我会要求对方的品行正直，而这点他就符合了。他也不嫖……
汉：不什么？（碧仁重复："不嫖"时，他露出了暧昧的笑容。）
碧：（斜眼看汉玮）至少据我所知啦，他不嫖，也不好色。
汉：我怎么嫖呢？我又不常出门。
碧：好色不在于你出不出门嘛！他的心确实很定，处事待人方面也不会说一套做一套，是可以和你直接交心的人。

惊喜情人VS幸福女人

在人生的历程中，大家都要扮演不同的角色，从儿女、男女朋友、丈夫妻子、到父母等等；觉得哪个角色是自己最能胜任的？
汉：嗯……我想我应该会是个好父亲吧。我有一套和人谈问题的方法，虽然不能完全为对方解决问题，但也有90巴仙吧。如果我是一家之主，相信会让大家平静地了解问题，并想方法去解决。就拿我家人来说，整个家庭中，我侄儿就只怕我一个人。我相信他这种感觉就是以后对我的尊重，因为我会跟他好好地谈问题。

不错不错，但影迷可能会比较好奇于你是不是个好情人……
汉：应该不算很好吧，因为我不怎么相信爱情。周围发生过太多事情了，已经没太大的感觉。以前曾试过去寻找爱情，但过程并不那么开心；现在我会比较在乎如何去好好地过自己的生活。但当我能抛开顾虑，完全投入于感情中时，我会是个让对方惊喜的情人；也很嘴硬心软，即使与对方有冲突，到了最后关头我还是会去迁就对方。

那么这位好情人能否接受同居或是一夜情？
汉：当然可以接受啊，现在什么年代了。不管结果如何，最重要的是要尝试过。不过我是个很挑剔的人，会很在乎对象给我的感觉；很遗憾的是，我到目前为止都还没尝试过一夜情。

Good Guy VS Good Gal

What kind of characteristics does a good man need...?

Hanwei: Whether one is a good man or good woman, one should have a strong sense of responsibility towards work, family and friends. Besides that one also has to respect others and be filial to one's parents. Also one should know the purpose of living. This is the way to gain respect from others.

Biren: I feel that a good man should be upright whether in thinking or behavior. He also has to care a lot about the family. On top of taking care of parents before marriage and wife and children after marriage, he has to be serious about his work. He shouldn't be complacent. Actually just like my husband. Ha ha!

Then what should a good woman be like?

Biren: Just like me! Ha ha !

Hanwei: I think a good woman of the 21st century should have her own view and personality and not be dragged by the nose by man. She also has to fulfill the need of the other half. But don't think crooked. This includes satisfying the other partner's appetite, like providing delicious food when the husband is back.

Biren: Then she must be a housewife?

Hanwei: Not necessarily. Mainly she has to be good in the kitchen and presentable in the living room*. When two people live together it is unavoidable that they will have minor conflicts in living habits. For example unhappy that the other partner snores during sleep. However outside the house they should respect each other.

Biren: Right. Whatever happens at home, we shouldn't criticise the other in public.

According to what you know of each other, do you think the other party is a good man or good woman?

Hanwei: Biren is definitely a good woman because she satisfies my most important condition, that is a very strong sense of responsibility. But I it find more difficult to accept her stubborn character. I highly respect her strong principles, but there're times when she knew she was in the wrong, but yet she insisted on not compromising.

Biren: Hanwei is very filial. Whenever he is free he'll go home (Johor Bahru). He really dotes on his mother. But I don't know what he would be like after marriage...

Hanwei: It's not necessary to see it after marriage ah. A good man can manifest himself in work and towards friends. Don't tell me good man can only be used to describe a husband?

Biren: Of course it's not like this. However from how a married man treats his family, it's even more possible to judge whether he is a good man. But Hanwei is really a good person. Whether as a husband or friend, I'll demand for an upright character and moral behavior. He satisfies these criteria. He also doesn't go whoring...

Hanwei: Does not what? (When Biren repeated " doesn't go whoring", he showed a secretive smile.)

Biren: (Eyeing Hanwei) At least from what I know he doesn't go whoring and he's not lecherous.

Hanwei: How to go whoring? I seldom go out.

Biren: It's not whether you go out or not that determines whether you're lecherous mah! He has a cool and steady head. He's not the type that says one thing but does another thing in dealing with people. He's the type that can confide in you directly.

Wonderful Lover VS Happy Woman

In life's journey we all have to play different roles. From children to spouse to parents etc. Which role do you think you are most competent in?

Hanwei: Erm.....I think I can be a good father. I've a way of discussing with people about their problems. Although I can't solve their problems totally , but almost 90 percent of it is solved. If I am the head of the household, I believe I'll bring all to understand the problems calmly and think of ways of solving them. Just take my family members for example. In the whole family my nephew is only afraid of me. I believe this kind of feeling is a result of respect for me, because I will talk with him about his problems properly.

That's right, that's right. But fans are probably more curious about whether you will be a good lover....

Hanwei: I think I'm not very good, because I don't really believe in romantic love. Too many things happen around me, don't have such great feelings already. Previously I've tried to find love but the process isn't that happy. Now I consider how to lead my own life well more important. But when I am able to throw my worries and doubt in the wind and fully plunge into love, I'll be a lover that springs pleasant surprise. I am very stubborn in words but soft at heart. Even if I clash with the other party, I'll still give in in the end.

Then can this good lover accept cohabitation and one night stand?

Hanwei: Of course I can accept. What kind of age are we living in now! No matter what the result of cohabitation is, the most important is having tried. But I am a very choosy person and value the kind of feeling the partner gives me. Regrettably, I haven't experience one night stay up to now.

As good friends, do the two feel very funny when shooting kissing scenes in the television drama "Vivelafamille"? Previously when Hanwei had to do kissing scene with Phyllis Quek whom he just knew, he compared the experience to "pig skin against shoe sole". How does he describe his kissing scenes with Biren?

Hanwei: (thought for a long while) It's left hand against right hand. Left hand and right hand are different but when they clap there is sound. We are very familiar with each other. At that time we are deep into the roles, so the feeling is very natural.

Biren: From my point of view, it isn't a very passionate scene but it's a natural development of the plot where emotions flow. During the first take, I felt like laughing the moment I saw him. The people working around us are also very familiar. This made the atmosphere very strange. But we didn't have excessive takes. (The two started to discuss if it's two or 3). Anyway, not more than 3.

Hanwei: No matter who I shoot intimate scenes with, I'll make things clear to the other party. Because most people would think that it works to the advantage of the guy. I don't want to waste time, and don't want the other party to misunderstand; although I think the gals really look forward to this moment. Ha ha! (everybody laughed). joking lah.

Biren: I trust him a lot so the shooting is more comfortable. The most important thing is to act out the feelings.

Cohabitating close friends VS well-meaning matchmaker

If, for work or some other reasons you all have to live under one roof, what are your reactions?

Biren: (Cutting in to reply) I know he's obsessed with cleanliness. I also have my faults mah but that's me mah! I don't love neatness and tidiness like him. I mind my own neatness but not those things around me....

Hanwei: Aiyah, take for example (Biren quickly tried to block Hanwei's mouth) like say when we eat biscuits. When I eat, I'll use my hand to collect the crust. She'll just put it in her mouth and let the crust fall all over her. Then she'll stand up, sweep away the crust and walk off. Ha ha!

Biren: Wei, I've improved a lot! My husband is just like Hanwei. The house must be very clean. Even if there are ants, my husband will chase them with insecticide. I am the "have means have" type of person". But we can reach a common understanding when living together.

Hanwei:(shaking his head and teasing) Not easy lah.

Biren: Who cares, the most is just clean up lah. Ha ha.

Hanwei: I will grumble as I clean up. After cleaning up, she dirties it again.

Biren: I am not dirty! I can do housework. Sweep and mop the floor and even cook.

Hanwei: Aiyah, I am only tough in words but soft at heart. After grumbling I'll go and clean up lah.

With such a blissful marriage, will Biren coax Hanwei to have a family soon?

Biren: Yes! I always ask him to find a girl friend. Because when we go out together, Zoe, Ling Ling and me are paired up with our husbands. If he can find his match, then the feeling at the outing will be even nicer, right? Also one hopes that a friend can find a partner mah. Maybe he already has one but dare not bring to show us. But cannot be impatient lah. Besides he'll act deaf and dumb and change topic whenever this is mentioned. Hai.

Hanwei: (indeed changed topic) Actually when I am with more familiar friends I am quieter. Most of the time they talk and I listen. I normally have lots of idle chatter with people I just know, so as to lessen the awkward atmosphere mah.

Biren: (continued the topic) From what I know, his expectation is rather high, so we dare not take action any o how. Anyway, I think he's not that bad. Can look for one himself. Ha ha!

Both are stepping beyond the mature age of 30. At this stage any new perception?

Hanwei: I want to earn more money (everybody laughed). It' true. My parents are over 60. I want to let them enjoy life more. This is my biggest aim. Will marriage let parents feel more secure? Marriage is worse. Got to spend more money. I am continuing to find my own world. Now I want to do what I like most and lead a life that belongs to me.