I would like to acknowledge the invaluable help of Chelsea. Without her, I wouldn’t be writing this. THANKS CHELSEA! This is a continuing story; so please be patient as I keep working on it. Please send feedback to [email protected].

ENJOY THE READ.

***This story takes place 2 years after "Motherhood"

Greece was in turmoil. Petty skirmishes had grown into full-scale wars. Entire villages and towns were destroyed. Generally nothing was left standing when the marauders came through each town and not many people were left alive.

Ares walked through the remains of one of his temples in such a town. As he looked around, he was struck by the irony of what had happened over the last two years. The changes that he had gone through and the changes that Greece was going through now. He reached out and touched a de-capitated statue of himself feeling something akin to sadness, maybe even a touch of the desolation that he got after he gave up his immortality. It occasionally plagued him though he didn’t understand why he felt that way. He noticed his hand and arm. He studied the scars that were there and remembered how he got them. He wondered if he was doing what ‘she’ would want him to do. How did he get to this pathetic low? The Great God of War wondering if a mortal would approve of what he was doing. The Great God of War…the former God of War. He still had trouble dealing with the loss. He had done it because he couldn’t let her die again if he could help it, even if it meant Athena’s death. When Caesar had her staked to that cross, he had felt every blow of the hammer as the nails were being driven into her hands and feet. He knew the moment her life had ended because the pain in him from loosing her had nearly driven him over the edge of insanity. When she was brought back to life, his sanity was returned to him. How had he become so tied to her? Shaking his head to clear the rambling thoughts and get back to why he was there, he walked over to the wall just left of the dais and touched the upper left corner of the design carved there. The wall slowly slid away to reveal the blackened and charred inside. He couldn’t help it when he nearly wept. All he had thought important or special had been kept in this place and now all of it was either gone or destroyed. He walked into the room to see if what he was really after was still there. He found one of the two items was still there, it was damaged but he could still see the face in it. The beauty of the person in the portrait gave him a moment of pause. He then tucked it into his vest. After some searching he found the remains of the other portrait without the golden frame that used to surround it. He decided it was time to leave and told himself to forget about that part of his life. It was over and she would never he his. He had to accept that fact.

"Real bummer, huh?" Only one person ever spoke like that. He looked to his right and saw his sister, Aphrodite. She still wore the black of her mourning instead of her usual pink, but other than that she looked just as always. He started to walk over to her and the closer he got he started to notice little differences in her. She looked tired, sad and about ready to give up. When he reached his favorite and only surviving sister, he pulled her into a loving hug. She was surprised and very pleased. He had learned so much of life in the last two years. She knew he really cared about her and a hug from him was just what she needed to pick up her spirits.

Amazingly, it picked up his spirits as well. He hadn’t realized how much he had missed her.

"Ar, we need to talk." She said as she leaned back and looked in his eyes.

"Let’s get out of here first" he replied and he led the way out with his arm around her waist.

When they were outside, he cleared a spot on a bench for her to sit and waited for her to tell him what was on her mind.

Aphrodite chose her words carefully, "I’ve checked up on you from time to time when I’ve had a chance. You have been HELPING people. What’s with that? You know war better than anybody. I would have thought you would be leading that army you were with, taking over the world. I did NOT expect to find you alone and helping people."

"What’s happening here isn’t war" he started. "It’s murder. War is a way to make changes happen. It can give people with nothing left to loose a chance. It can give hope to people who don’t have any hope. What’s happening now isn’t war. War should not be used to destroy simply because someone can." He shook his head in disgust.

"Why is this happening? I don’t understand it and I can’t seem to stop it. I’m still the Goddess of Love, why can’t I put love in all these people and stop all of this? Love is like THE most powerful force on earth. I should be able to stop this!"

Now he understood why she had looked so sad and tired. Ares smiled at her using that smile he used whenever he talked with his little sister. "When the God of War died, all the hate and violence that was under his control was let out into the world. It had to find a new place to reside. It could only enter a heart that was mostly filled with hate and violence to begin with. It grew in those hearts and twisted them so much that nothing else could enter them. Hate and violence can enter a heart just as love can and when one has filled the heart there is no room for the other. Until the person wants to change, nothing can change it. Not even a God."

It wasn’t lost on ‘Dite that he didn’t associate the God of War with himself anymore. She figured it was the only way he could deal with the loss of his immortality and all that had happened to him since then. "Why are most people including you not affected by the hate and violence?"

"Most people have more love in their hearts than they have hate as you well know. Therefore the hate can’t enter until that seed of ugliness is laid there. When that happens the hate will consume them. Do you remember Callisto? That seed was laid in her heart. It started out as anger over her family’s death, and then it grew and changed into something else. Normally, the anger gets let go and becomes grief. Then the healing can begin as love and forgiveness enter the heart again. When someone like Callisto holds on to the anger, it grows into hate. It twists the heart and soul until it can’t be anything else. Xena was similar to that but she was able to change that hate. When she saw what she had become and the things she did because of it, she didn’t like it. That’s when love was able to lay a little seed in her heart named Gabrielle. Gabrielle understood what would happen if Xena didn’t let the anger go. She taught Xena how to let go. But if Xena didn’t want to change, no amount of work on Gabrielle’s part would have changed her. Now Xena is in balance. People who are in balance between love and hate such as Xena is or someone like Gabrielle who understands that love and hate are the two extremes of one emotion won’t be affected because they deal with it all the time. That’s why it hasn’t affected me, I’m use to it. But for people like Darphus or Draco, people who deal in hate and violence everyday, they just became more hate filled and violent."

"It has affected you. You’ve been fighting to help the people that two years ago you wouldn’t have hesitated to destroy. I think the seed of love had been laid in your heart. Hmmm, I wonder what her name is? As if I need to ask."

‘Dite was silent for some time as she pretended to think about what he said. She actually knew all of this; she just needed it as an opening for the real reason she was there. "Ar, you have to become the God of War again."

She stated it so calmly that it took him a second before he started to laugh. "Right. I’ll just declare myself the God of War again and all will be fine with the world. Come on Aphrodite, use your head." He was upset that she would taunt him like this.

She looked at him and he saw she was hurt that he didn’t take her idea seriously. "You’re serious?" he asked amazed. Then the thunder struck as he realized what just happened. "You minx! You planned this whole thing! You already knew that stuff didn’t you? Of course you did, you would have had to." He couldn’t believe it. The sister who always seemed to be a ditz just manipulated him in a way that would have made the God of War proud. "Boy, being mortal has made me a bit slow though. Okay, ‘Dite, how am I supposed to do it? Zeus destroyed the last of the ambrosia years ago."

She jumped up excitedly as a scroll appeared in her hand. "That’s what I thought until I found this in Zeus’ chambers." She handed him the scroll.

As he looked at the scroll, he brows furrowed in confusion "I don’t get it. It’s a map. So what?" Then understanding hit him like a kick from a horse. "Does this mean what I think it does?"

"Apollo and I think so. When I found it, it gave me the idea to get your Godhood back."

He studied the scroll closer. It was a map to something that was for certain. "What makes you think this will lead to the ambrosia? It could lead to his favorite drinking tavern."

She smiled a knowing smiled and unrolled the scroll further. "Look at the top" was all she said.

Right on the top of scroll was one word: AMBROSIA. Ares was still suspicious. "Why would Zeus make a map leading to it? Why not just destroy it?"

"Ar, I don’t know. Only Zeus can answer that question but, ah, I don’t really want to find him and ask. Do you?"

"NO! I don’t know. This just seems to easy."

Aphrodite couldn’t believe he was making so much out of this. Then he told her something that nearly knocked her off her feet. "’Dite, I’m not sure I want to be the God of War again. I’m not sure I can still do what the job requires. Damn me, so much has happened, I’m just not sure it’s the right thing to do."

She tried to digest that he didn’t want to be a God and found that to be a near impossibility. She tried to make him understand "How can it NOT be the right thing to do? Greece is being destroyed by all of this. Soon there might not be a Greece if something doesn’t change. We need a God of War."

"I agree. Greece needs a God of War. I just don’t think I should be the one to do it."

"Come on Ares, who else could do it?" She was starting to loose her patience with him when she decided to try a different tact "it would give you back your Godhood. I know you want that back."

"True, that would be nice" he said but his thoughts went a different way. ‘What if I can’t do it anymore? What if I make things worse?’

She shook her head as she tried to make sense of what he was saying. This time she tried the more direct approach. "If it is at all possible, you have to try. The world is depending on it. But I think you should have some help." With that, she grabbed his arm and before he could say anything else, transported them to a hill.

The hill was just at the outer rim of a battle that was being fought near a village. Ares surveyed the battle quietly. The defenders appeared to be holding against the attack. He wasn’t going to interfere unless it looked like the defenders were going to lose until he saw two the defenders. With a look at his sister and a growl, he drew his sword and started down the hill to cut a path toward the two warriors he knew. As soon as he started down the hill, Aphrodite disappeared.

It was obvious that this was not the first battle be to fought here. There were old and new wounds on everybody living and dead. It took most of the afternoon but finally the attackers retreated. The remaining force of defenders returned to the village with the wounded. Ares went with them. That was when he looked around and was revolted at what he saw. The ravages of war were apparent everywhere. The people were wounded, sick and starving. He felt someone staring at him and he turned to find Xena and Gabrielle looking at him with curiosity written all over their faces.

"Surprise!" he said with faked cheer. He looked at Xena then Gabrielle. He quickly noticed the small changes in both of them. They both had wounds that were healing and both had lost weight from the constant fighting. They both looked good to him but those green eyes, those amazing green eyes held him captive until she spoke.

"You’ve been wounded. Let’s go the hospital and have a look at them." He followed as Xena led the way to the hospital. She mobilized the hospital into action as Gabrielle started to check Ares’ wounds. He had a small wound on his right shoulder but a more serious wound on his left hand. In fact, by the many scars on his hand, it looked like he was lucky to still have all five fingers. "Where did you get all these scars?" ‘What a dumb question, obviously in battle you idiot’ she thought to herself. His nearness made her a little nervous but she didn’t know why.

"I’ve been in a few battles and I keep forgetting I’m not immortal. I keep blocking with my off hand. I’ve manage to remember to move it just in time to keep it from getting chopped off." He quickly changed the subject off of himself "how long has the village been under siege?"

She became quieter "About a month. They were attacked three days after Xena, Eve and I arrived. There have been so many wars lately, we were hoping for a rest but when they were attacked, well, you know us. We jumped right in and tried to help. From what we have been told every thug and warlord in the area has been through here and takes whatever he or she wants. They’ve killed most of the fighting aged men and rape or killed most of the women. They slaughtered entire families." Ares had been watching her as she spoke and saw the sadness building in her. He had the urge to reach over and kiss the pain away instead he just listened. "These people didn’t have much to begin with and it has gotten less and less. I’m not sure how they will survive much longer with the way the world is right now." She tried to cheer up a little "thanks for the help today. It really made a difference. We didn’t even know you were in the area."

He looked at the hand that she was bandaging. He felt a warmth in him at her small comment of thanks and thought about what ‘Dite had said. Suddenly a villager stood in front of him and offered him a gift of food. Ares didn’t understand what it was for and asked him.

"You helped to save us today, my family the village and me. I want you to have this. It isn’t much but it is all I have to offer you." It was all he had?!? It was just a crusty piece of bread and some moldy cheese. Ares didn’t know what to do. All he knew was that he couldn’t take it. He felt embarrassment, confusion and several other things he couldn’t identify. He was able to identify sadness and repulsion at the despair in the man.

"You have family here still?" ‘Why did I ask that? I don’t really care, do I? By the Gods, don’t I have enough emotions already that I don’t understand?’

"Some" the man answered. "My wife, kids, parents and one of my sisters were killed but I still have a younger sister and my other sister’s baby boy."

"Keep it. Give it to your family." Ares said.

When the man left Gabrielle said, "that was kind of rude you know."

He looked a question at her. She answered the unasked question. "It was all he had and when you turned it down, you basically told him it wasn’t good enough for you."

Without thinking about what he was saying he answered her. "How could I take what he offered? It was all he had. Did you see him? He’s starving to death and he offers me his food. I would think that he would be hoarding food, doing whatever it takes to feed what remains of his family. Not giving away what little they had. Why would he do that? I still don’t understand mortals!"

He had surprised Gabrielle into silence. Had he changed that much in two years? She glanced at him and saw his red face. Ares wouldn’t look her. He just kept looking down at his wounded hand.

She had almost finished dressing his wounds when a familiar voice floated over them. "This place is like totally sad." They looked up to see Aphrodite standing above them about to cry. "Have you talked to Xena and Gabrielle yet?" she asked to try and keep the tears from cascading down her lovely face.

"No because I haven’t agreed to it yet."

"Talked to us about what and what haven’t you agreed to?" came another voice from behind them. All three jumped as if they had been caught doing something wrong. Xena and Eve had walked up behind them.

"Ares has to become the God of War again." Aphrodite stated without preamble. Gabrielle and Eve were stunned but Xena just nodded her head as if she had been expecting this all along.

"What?!?" Gabrielle stated when she finally could.

Aphrodite explained it as best she could because Ares refused to speak to any of them. Gabrielle looked at him and saw he was watching her. She looked into his eyes but didn’t understand what she saw there. She still couldn’t believe what she was hearing and said so when Aphrodite finished.

"It makes sense Gabrielle. He’s the best one for the job and Greece needs someone in control of war. What do you need from us?" Xena answered.

"Your help if, and that’s a BIG IF, I decide to do it. I need to get to the ambrosia."

"I thought it was all gone." Stated Xena.

Aphrodite answered, "I found this scroll in Zeus’ chamber. It looks like he hid it not destroyed it. This map should lead to it." ‘Dite started to hand the scroll to Xena but changed her mind and handed it to Gabrielle.

"This map is pretty simple. It’s not like Zeus at all. What’s up?" Gabrielle asked as she re-rolled the scroll to hand back to Aphrodite.

"That’s what I would like to know too." Ares said. "I don’t trust something that looks that simple."

"That’s what I think to. I want him to have someone else along in case he gets into trouble." Aphrodite smirked.

"Thanks for the vote of confidence, Aphrodite. And I haven’t said I’m going." Ares sneered.

She stuck her tongue out at him. "You have to have someone with you. What if you got hurt? Your not use to being mortal yet." She said as she grabbed his hurt hand for emphasis. He jerked his hand back before she could hurt him further. "You will need someone who can fight and bandage you up. And she had better be smart too. You don’t know what traps Zeus laid."

Everyone was silent because she had made her point very well. Nobody else had thought that there might be traps involved. "That’s why it looks so easy to get to. He knew only a mortal would try for it so the traps are bound to be made for a mortal to get caught in. You need a mortal."

"We’ll both go. Eve, you stay and take care of these people." Xena said.

"Mother, what about these people? How are they going to survive without someone here to help them fight? That warlord isn’t going to go away anytime soon." Eve, silent until now stated.

Xena looked disgruntled about this development. How could she leave when she was all they had? "Gabrielle, you will have to go alone. Eve’s right, we need two people here, one to fight and the other to heal." Xena looked at her daughter with love. What a change Eve had made since they found each other again. She had learned to care about people and she was becoming an excellent healer.

"Little one, will you go with him?" Aphrodite asked.

"I guess so, I mean, do I really have a choice? Apparently, we need the God of War back and two heads on this journey will be better than just one." Gabrielle didn’t sound too thrilled to go. Ares was sad that she didn’t want to go. He saw this as an opportunity to spend time with her and was happy about it. She saw it the same way but was unhappy about it.

"When will you leave?" Xena asked.

"I haven’t agreed…" Ares tried to say but he was interrupted by Gabrielle.

"I guess we can leave tonight, when it’s dark. That will give us a couple of hours before we leave. Ares, can you travel with those wounds? We will have to move hard and fast to make it past that warlord."

"Yes I can, if I decide to go. But I…" He was cut off again, this time by Aphrodite.

"Ex-squeeze me? Are you forgetting you have the last Goddess here? I’ll just transport you two past his camp. And I think I can arrange for a little distraction for him. That should give you more time to get farther away. It might even give these people a chance for a rest." She said as she looked around.

"Why don’t you transport them to were the map says the stuff is?" Eve asked.

"We don’t know what traps there are. I don’t know about Gabrielle, but I don’t want to be transported into the middle of something that I can’t control." Ares said. "And I’m still not sure I should do this. I think someone else should be the God of War." He looked directly at Xena.

"No way! I’m staying mortal, thank you. I want to spend more time with Eve, not running all the wars." Xena stated this that way of hers that means ‘no arguments’.

"Great! We’re all agreed then." Said ‘Dite.

"I HAVEN’T AGREED TO GO!" Ares stormed. He had everybody’s attention now. "Why should it be me? Why?" He stalked away from the group as they just watched him walk away. They were all dumbfounded at his reaction.

"That’s the last thing I expected to hear from him." Xena said. She started to head out after him but Gabrielle stopped her.

"This is more my territory. I’ll talk to him." When Gabrielle said this, Xena looked a little uneasy but let her go after him.

Ares let out a resigned breath. He knew they were right but just didn’t want to admit the real reason he didn’t want to be a God again. ‘How can I go back to being what I was? Xena should understand that better than anybody. I could never be close to ‘her’ if I become a God again.’ He was brought out of his thoughts when he felt a hand on his arm. He looked to see who it was and saw ‘her’.

"We need you." That simple statement dropped his heart into his stomach. He was mortal because of her and he really couldn’t regret her being alive. He knew that if he had it to do over again, he would make the same choice. He looked into those green eyes he had seen so many times in his dreams. He knew he risked losing her if he became the God of War again. He risked losing whatever connection they had. Did he really want to risk that?

"Is this the only way? Am I the only one who can do it?"

"As much as the thought of bringing back a God dedicated to warfare upsets me, all this," Gabrielle indicated the whole destroyed village with the sweep of her arm, "makes me sick. And yes, it should be you. You were War before and you understand it. If having you back as the God of War stops all of this, how can it be wrong? It would be for the greater good. Besides, the only other people who might want the job are warlords and that would make things worse not better." Ares looked at her only to see the truth of her words written on her face.

Ares closed his eyes and burned the image of her in his memory. She was such a good person she was willing to help bring back someone she hated because it might help stop the killing. He realized that he really didn’t have a choice either. As the God of War he might lose her, but he would never leave her. He would be better able to protect her if he was the God of War and that thought more than any other, convinced him to do it. They slowly walked back to where the others were waiting. He took a very deep breath and nodded his head in agreement.

"Cool, Ar. Let’s go!" Aphrodite tried to grab their hands, but Gabrielle snatched her back.

"’Dite will you do two things for me while we’re gone? First, can you conjure up some food for these people? And second, can you check on my sister, Lila, once in a while and let Xena know if anything is wrong? Will you do these two things for me?"

"Not a problem on number two, Little one, but the first one is a bit more difficult. We don’t just make food appear out of thin air. We transport it from one place to another. If I bring food here, someone else might not get any. Should I still do it?"

Xena answered her before anyone else could "no. No one else should suffer because of what’s happened here. We’ll get by some other way."

Gabrielle nodded her head in agreement. "I just need to gather my stuff and we can go." She was back in about 15 minuets with her traveling gear. She said her good-byes to Xena and Eve as she hugged each of them. Xena then turned to Ares and gave him a warning.

"If anything happens to Gabrielle, whether you become a God or not I will find you and I will destroy you. Do you understand that?" The ice in her voice left little doubt that she would do exactly as she said she would.

Ares didn’t say anything. He just nodded his head and clinched his jaw shut. He understood that Xena didn’t know how protective of Gabrielle he had been before he lost his immortality but the warning still grated on his nerves. Did she think he was incapable of protecting Gabrielle? He tried not to look angry but figured he failed when ‘Dite took his arm and shook her head as a suggestion not to say anything. Gabrielle walked over to them and with one last look at her friends, they all disappeared.

Aphrodite transported them about 3 miles from the warlord’s camp. "This should do. And don’t worry about that jerk attacking anyone for a while. I have a feeling he will be a little too distracted to bother anyone. At least until morning." ‘Dite said.

"Aphrodite, you’re not going to go to him, are you? I don’t think I like that idea at all." Gabrielle asked her friend.

"I don’t like it either." Ares said to his sister.

"Not to worry. I am still the Goddess of Love. Are you forgetting that lust is just a small part of love? He and his soldiers will just find themselves too occupied with the camp followers to worry about anything else. This will be a snap. Mortals are so tedious." And she vanished in a flash of pink.