I Need a Friend Right Now

Author: Chelsea

Disclaimer: Characters belong to Renaissance, Studios USA, and anyone else who owns the rights to Xena, Warrior Princess.

Spoiler: Friend in Need, just realized that the title could be shortened to FIN, coincidence or TPTB playing word game here?

Summary: Just one among the thousands that are flooding the net. I guess I should really call this my “rant” piece, just wanted to get a few things off my chest.

Rating: PG

Note: Has not been beta’d, I apologize in advance.

Gabrielle stepped off the plank and onto solid ground again. She had finally learned to control her seasickness. Too bad Xena wasn’t here to share in her triumph. She looked around at the familiar surroundings and sighed, “home, Xena; we’re finally home.” She sucked in her bottom lip for a split second, not quite a smile, but not a frown neither.

“I’m gonna have to find me a horse, then I can take you back to Amphipolis, and you can finally rest.” She walked off in search of a stable still talking softly to her friend. “What am I going to tell Eve, Xena? How am I even going to be able to find her? I don’t want her hearing about this from someone else.” She continued desperately. “Give me a sign, please?” She looked around, nothing. She sighed and was going to try to find a horse, but the familiar sense of unease made her stop and turned around. Her intuition was proven correct as she found Ares leaning against the side of one of the wagons used by the street vendors, a solemn look on his chiseled features.

The two stared at each other for a long time, but neither broke the silence. Finally Gabrielle walked across to stand right in front of the God. “You know.” It was not a question.

Ares nodded silently, took the urn that she was still holding in one hand. “So...this is all that’s left of her?” He questioned; a look of pain passed his eyes.

Gabrielle nodded. She thought she had shed the last of her tears on that long boat ride back to Greece, but she was wrong. Somehow knowing that there’s someone else sharing her pain made her all tearful again. A drop, then two, followed by the third and the dam finally broke. Surprisingly she felt a warm hand on her hair, pushing it back, then the hand moved down, wiping away her tears. Before she knew what she was doing, Gabrielle had snuggled up to him, taking comfort without trying to reason it out first.

“Don’t Gabrielle; you know she’d be crying too if she could only see you like this.”

“I think she can.” Gabrielle said softly. “Her spirit will always be with me.”

Gabrielle didn‘t know why, but having him there made her feel better, not so alone. The tears dried and she looked up at him to find him with a question of his own. “Why? Can you tell me why?”

Gabrielle shook her head. “It was the only way for her to redeem herself. She had to do it Ares. She gave up her life to save the souls of forty thousands. She was the cause of their deaths; she’d never find peace otherwise.”

“Redeem herself?” The words came out in a snarl. “She couldn’t try to redeem herself right here in Greece? She didn’t kill enough people here to warrant...” His voice choked and faltered.

“Why are you like this? What difference does it make now?” Gabrielle pushed away from him in anger, but she was surprised to see how truly upset he was.

“She died so far away, Gabrielle. I couldn’t even feel her essence when she died. I only felt it as you near. I could have stopped it Gabrielle.”

Gabrielle shook her head sadly. “This isn’t about you Ares.” When he looked at her in anger, she continued, not giving him a chance to speak. “She didn’t choose to die so far away from home. She didn’t choose to die so young and so full of life. She didn’t choose to leave behind her daughter and...and...everyone who loves her. She didn’t have a choice Ares. Her death was not something that she chose to do; it was something that she had to do.” When his expression did not soften, Gabrielle lost her temper. “Get over yourself Ares. XENA DIED. Do you really care? Or is self-pity the only emotion you really understand?” She grabbed the urn from him and turned to walk away.

Gabrielle had not taken more than ten steps when he was beside her again. “Go away Ares.”

“I’m sorry.” He whispered. “I just don’t know how to handle it.”

“I had the urn in my hands. All I had to do was to place it in the fountain, but I didn’t because I knew she wouldn’t be able to live with herself afterwards.” Her voice too was barely above a whisper. “I know you love her, but I love you her too, you know? I had to let her stay dead Ares. Do you have any idea how that made me feel?”

Ares sighed. “So, she died a warrior’s death, just the way she always envisioned for herself.”

“Yeah, and she had no regrets Ares. How many of us can say that when we die?” A ghost of a smile was starting to tug at the corner of her mouth. “She had really lived her life to the fullest. Whether she was a warlord, working for you, or when she was helping people, traveling with me. She belonged to both of us Ares, just in different ways. I know you are hurting, but don’t be angry with her. Even with all that’s between you two, she did care.”

“Now you are just trying to make me feel better.”

“No, I’m not. You were her mentor; she never forgot that. She did care about you, just not enough.” She stopped and then asked. “Can I ask a favor?”

He nodded. “I don’t think I can refuse you anything right now.”

“Can you take me to Eve? I need to talk to her.”

“Okay, but you are going to own me a favor for this.” The arrogance was back.

“I can’t believe you...forget it. I’ll find my own way.” Gabrielle turned away, but before she could take more than a step, his hand gripped her elbow tightly, forcing her to stop.

“The favor is simple, my fiery bard. You are not going to hide from me. You’ll let me come see you. I...I need a friend, Gabrielle.” He sighed. “Much as I hate to admit this, especially to you. I really don’t have any, um...friends, that is.”

Gabrielle looked at him, stunned. “I don’t know if we could ever be friends Ares. Too much had gone on in the past, and I don’t even know where I’ll end up.” She fingered the chakram resting securely by her side.

“You have her chakram.” He had seen it, but had just thought that she was keeping it as a memento. Now he narrowed his eyes as he watched her gripping it lightly. “It’s your weapon now.”

“I’m going to try to continue her work.” She said simply. “I can actually use it too, surprising, isn’t it?”

“I never doubted you could carry on her legacy.” He stared at her and Gabrielle tilted her head to one side, surprised. “You didn‘t?”

“Remember I said you had potential? I wasn’t lying Gabrielle. You just didn’t have the killer instinct.” He continued. “Sometimes, that’s a necessity.” He watched as she tried to digest that little piece of information. “Can I ask why? You don’t have anything to redeem.”

“Maybe, then again maybe not. But it’s what I need to do right now.” She stared as the sun continued to travel toward the west, leaving a crimson trail along the sky. “Ares, I really have to go. Are you going to help me or not?”

He nodded. “But this isn’t goodbye Gabrielle; I will see you again.” He said softly and sent her on her way.

fin