Now you too can have a vampire for a day, and hold your own
Interested in hiring a vampire for a personal appearance?
Why bother with those acting agencies, when can hire the REAL THING!
Now, for a small fee (see prices below), Chef Dracula, aka Brad Trudeau, is now available and free for hire!
For any type of special occasion, or just for the fun of it, what's better than hiring a Life-Less Vampire to liven up your life????
- Birthdays, where he'll take more than a bite out of the cake
- Funerals, Brad's favorites, since he likes to admire coffins and dream of his own death, which will only occur with the help of this site
- Baby Showers, Brad really can't remember his, since it was over 3000 years ago; He'll even bring a pair of fangs for the newborn!
- Weddings, He'll do more than kiss the bride
- Wedding nights, where more than blood will be drained
- Anniversaries, he'll drink to their health
- Blood Transfusions, at a cut-rate cost!
- House Warmings, he'll christen the new house with a bottle of blood, and bring you some pet bats
- Christmas parties, as long as he's not close to the chestnuts roasting on the open fire
- Valentine's Day parties, as long as you don't try to touch his heart
- Bachelorette parties, you show him your (well, you know), and he'll show you his fangs
So, if you are interested in the hire-a-vampire program, please review the information below:
Chef Dracula Personal Appearance Agency
Phone Number 1-800-555-VAMPIRE
Pager Number 214-786-9665
Contact: Mr. Renfield
Personal Service Fees:
1 bottle of Orange-Glo (daytime appearances only, for his protection from the sunlight)
1 gallon of fresh blood (preferrably from cute, young women) per appearance, plus 1 extra pint for every hour of service
One bite of a guest's neck (Must be a cute, young woman) for every appearance
All fees subject to negotiation
Call Us For Your Next Gathering!
DISCLAIMER:This web page is not affiliated in any way with Brad Trudeau's "BLT Enterprises," where the food quality is probably about as high as a 'B'acon, 'L'ettuce, and 'T'omato sandwich.
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