Welcome to the Imperial Food Court!
Those across this great world can now rest once again.
Their dreams will now come true with the coming of the long-awaited and anticipated addition to America's adventures in the culinary industry, "The Imperial Food Court", a new and exciting culinary creation coming to a cooking channel near you.
Forget about those outdated ancestors of the culinary industry, because this new adventure features some truly entertaining talent...two of the most well-known creators of culinary artistry and entertainment in the Dallas district.
Let's give our hosts an honorable introduction:
Chef Helen Duran, The Queen of the Food Court
A well-respected member of the Dallas food scene, Helen is currently the Deli-Cheese manager of the Central Market store in Dallas. Even though she spends countless hours a week to steer pour-souled citizens away from such sickening products such as Velveeta Cheese and Boar's Head deli selections, she still felt like she had to also lend support to the rest of Dallas-area society. Spending years in hot and steamy kitchens has given her the spirit to stray those heartless souls away from the very unstimulating food selections of many Dallas citizens. With her new efforts as the Queen of the Food Court, she just might yet be able to save and restore society itself.
And now, we meet her sidekick and "Imperial Food Court" sideshow attraction
Chef Brad "Dracula" Trudeau
Unlike Chef Duran, Chef Dracula, on the other hand, is on this show for more of the entertainment value than for his culinary skills in the kitchen. Known around town as not just a chef, but more so as Count Dracula, the demon of the undead. Frquently seen flying across town at sunset (his version of a morning jog), he tries to unsuccessfully strike fear into those who see him, until they soon realize that he is more of a sissie than sinister. He has tried to mend himself and turn into a solid citizen, but it was all too unsuccessful. The friends that he tried to fraternize with realized all too soon that he will never succeed at this. The Count, for one thing, practically comes close to acting like a corpse in all kinds of scenarios. Not even hired forms of social entertainment could awaken this sinister soul. Or maybe not. It's worth a shot.
Anyway, in this "Imperial Food Court" scenario, his role will to be the comic relief, the receiver of all insults, and the sucker for all stupid pranks. When would you ever see a chef turn into a bat and fly across a room full of audience members at an Emeril show?
We're sure hope that you'll join us this summer, with Chef Helen and Chef Dracula the Royal Dunce. Each episode, Chef Helen will sit atop her Royal Throne and advise the audience in new ways to please their palettes (Unfortunately, Brad will not be able to please anything or anyone to his liking, since this IS a family show), and tantalize your tastes with all kinds of Epicurean treats. Dracula would do the same, but only if a recipes for A, AB, AB negative, or any other blood types are requested.
Don't forget to catch us for all of these culinary adventures with Helen and Brad, as they come to you from their Royal Castle. Of course, Helen will grace herself on the red carpet while Brad just flaps and flies with his wings to his place next to the throne.
And, for only a few special engagements, stright from the caverns below the castle, our "Special guest" for the season:
(Picture unavailable to due possible computer virus hazards if loaded onto the internet, but this is a depiction of her costume worn at a certain "Raiser Grazer of Dallas" in recent weeks)
Another culinarian amongst the citizens of Dallas, she is also the director of a culinary institution in this fine city. Here, she, uh, leads(??) her students into exciting new careers. (LAUGH)
As a service to our show, she will also serve as the security while the Court is in session.
Having a chamaeleon-like ability for appearance transformation, this is another one of her many likenesses.
(Before flying, she is assisted by her loyal monkey, Schultz)
One of her most famous lines of fear.
And when you think you rule the World, and only a mere bucket of water brings it all down (This episode, the season finale, has been previously filmed, which is why she will only appear THIS season).
She pissed off one too many audience members.
Her final farewell
The final Food Court Sing-A-Long of the season, with only her puddled remains left behind.
Hope to see you next season, and May The "Court" Be With You!
DISCLAIMER:This web page is not affiliated in any way with Brad Trudeau's "BLT Enterprises," where the food quality is probably about as high as a 'B'acon, 'L'ettuce, and 'T'omato sandwich.
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