Disclaimer: Xena and Gabrielle belong to Renaissance/Universal Pics. No copyright infringement was intended. This piece is based on the love Xena feels for Gabrielle. If this might offend you etc, please don't read on.

Dedication: For the many friends I've made through working as a bard. Thank you for the support and encouragement you've all given me… especially Sham, Jan, Melissa, Lindsey, Keith, Suzanne and the skyonexena yahoogroup. Also for the members of Reneelovers and ThePitBards and for Tanya and her cousin from aresxenadavid. Hope I haven’t left anyone out but a big thanks to everyone.

Bard's Note: This piece is very short and it's Xena's thoughts as she's watching Gabrielle sleep. It's set a while after they meet.

Why do I feel this way? I don’t understand. She's just a young girl I picked up along the way. Yes, ok, she saved my life but I'm a tough warrior. I'm not supposed to care like this. She's young, you know. VERY young. She talks a lot. She's annoying sometimes but for some reason, I can't send her away. Yeah, she's got nice eyes and a good smile but she's not a warrior like me. In fact, we're nothing alike.

Funny, there would have been a time when I would have passed her by without giving her a second look… or even a first… but sometimes she looks at me and I want to smile. I want to smile simply because she smiles at me. I think I'm getting soft. I've always believed that the strongest tree in the forest stands alone but she thinks the opposite. She thinks that everyone has someone who is the other half of their soul. She's looking for hers. I wonder if she'll ever find it.

I told her that the life I lead is full of danger but she just said that friends stick by each other when there's danger. Gods, she always disagrees with me but, you know, I don't care… and I don't know why. I've found myself actually listening to her when she tells stories. I always thought stories were a waste of time when you could be in a good fight but now I listen at night while I'm sharpening my sword. The scraping sound of stone on metal used to calm my inner turmoil. Now it's her voice that brings me peace.

Why do I feel this way? I really don’t understand. She knows nothing of warfare or tactics and we really have nothing in common… except one thing. We need each other. Yeah… we do… gods, I've never needed anyone before but now…

She depends on me to keep her safe. I depend on her to keep my darkness at bay and somehow, she always does. I haven't figured out how yet. Maybe I never will. I know I've hurt her. I don’t mean to but I'm not an eloquent speaker like she is. I'm blunt, to the point and sometimes impatient. I'm not good at apologising but somehow, she always gets one from me. Yep, I think I'm getting soft.

I sometimes catch myself watching her when she's sleeping… look, I'm doing it now. My mind is often full of thoughts about her as we travel in silence. I even find myself dropping everything to listen to her or do something she asks. I often joked to myself that if she asked for a hand, I'd cut off my own to give it to her… but it's not funny anymore because I've realised that I really would.

Why do I feel this way? I definitely don’t understand. When she smiles at me, my heart soars higher than a bird. When she touches me, my hands tremble. When she's not with me, I spend the entire time thinking about her. Ok, I'll admit it… I miss her when she's not with me. The silence is overwhelming. I get in a really bad mood which I take out on thugs and raiders who get in my way.

Am I supposed to feel this way? I guess I am… since I love her more than anything else in this world. Yeah… now I understand.