According to the box, Children stars legendary make-up effects artist Tom Savini (Friday the 13th Part 6, Night of the Living Dead remake). Unfortunately, the box lies, and we are treated to only ten minutes of Mr. Savini. It is also unfortunate, may I add, that his scenes include some of the worst dubbing in cinema history (Godzilla included). Sure, he slays zombies in an original fashion, but this character isn't even half as bad-ass as Sex Machine (From Dusk Till Dawn). Also, Savini's presence is the film's only saving grace. From there, it's downhill (and his scenes were garbage, may I add).
The "plot", or lack thereof, focuses on a lonely, undead zombie (is there any other kind?) fourteen years after his loyal goons were slaughtered. This zombie is the most believable actor in this picture, as he has no lines of dialogue to destroy. For some reason or another, he finally decides to "revive" a flock of undead followers that consists of newly dead teens that perished in a car accident. Wait, back it up. The car accident I refer to was filmed in complete Ed Wood fashion. No continuity. Let me explain: We're in an SUV driving down a two lane road, suddenly a zombie jumps in front, we're in the bushes, and off a cliff - yet the road wasn't close to a cliff or bushes. What the?
Children of the Living Dead is the worst zombie picture I've ever seen. True, it doesn't sink to the cinematic depths of Zombie Lake, or Zombie 4 - but it's billed as the sequel to Night of the Living Dead. Huh? This film totally disregards the outstanding Dawn and entertaining Day. How offensive. To put it plainly: This is a pile of dung.
The high point: At least it wasn't five hours in length...
The low point: ...But it sure seemed it.
Bottom line: Re-caulk your kitchen sink instead.
It's scary to think that co-writer John A. Russo also had screenplay credit on the original Night of the Living Dead. Get back to your low budget crap, John. Even Santa Claws and Midnight were better than this debacle.
