Lactose was killed in a bizarre accident. While trying to watch BLUES BROTHERS 2000 for the 486th time, he reached for his box of Jujubees, but it turned out that his hand fell apon Gouda's stash of Milk Duds, instead. He had gotten milk-poisoning, which resulted in the very smelly discovery of his corpse, bathed in what seemed to be an ocean of his own loose feces.

He will not be missed by anyone.

We hope he rots in Hell.