|
"You know what I hate the most about Potions?" Sirius asked, leaning back
in his chair and staring at the high ceiling of the dungeons, where he and
his friends were seated and waiting for the lesson to begin.
"What?" James asked, scribbling absentmindedly on a piece of parchment.
"It�s the one class where we can�t hope for Snape to do something stupid
and lighten it up for us," continued Sirius as he noticed a patch of growing
mold in the corner of the ceiling. "I mean, at least in Transfiguration and
Flying lessons we can hope that he�ll mess up, but in Potions he�s always
really good. It makes me mad."
"That you�re worse than Snape at something?" Peter asked, seated behind
them. The blond boy cast a slightly worried glance in Snape�s direction (he
was seated a few tables away), but the dark-haired boy was talking with
Avery and didn�t notice.
"Of course not!" Sirius replied, looking mortally offended at the mere
suggestion. "Just that he doesn�t mess up and I can�t laugh at him. Not to
mention that he�s a teacher�s pet. Professor Durkham�s little pet puppy,
that�s what he is."
Peter snickered loudly and then tried to stop as his partner, Lily Evans,
gave him an odd look and raised at eyebrow at Sirius, who shrugged, a grin
appearing on his face. Rolling her eyes, Lily looked away and Peter calmed
down, responding, "I bet that�s it."
"What�s it?" James questioned, looking up from his parchment (where
Sirius could now see James� scratchy handwriting spelling out "Potions is
stupid" and "Snape�s a freak" in the center of the page.)
"That Snape�s Durkham�s pet," Peter answered, and James sniggered quietly
at the thought. "Like, a puppy, or a cat or�"
"A toad," interjected Sirius, giving Snape a look. "I can just see it,
too. It would explain all the warts, too."
Both Peter and James laughed at this, but Sirius frowned as he continued
to watch Snape. The dark-haired boy was heading towards the front of the
room, where Remus was seated alone (his partner was absent), and Avery,
Took, and Jenkins were following him with not-so-subtle grins on their
faces.
"Hold up," Sirius muttered as Snape approached an unsuspecting Remus,
"What are they doing?"
Just as he finished saying that, Snape grabbed Remus� arm and yanked it
up, forcing Remus to drop his quill, which fell onto his half-filled page of
parchment. Remus glared up at Snape and yanked his arm back, choosing not to
say anything as he picked his quill back up. Snape said something, which
Remus ignored, and at that point, Sirius decided that it was time to go up
and see what that was all about. Motioning for James and Peter to follow
him, Sirius stood up.
As he came closer, Sirius could here the end of Snape�s sentence,
"...such a freak anyway, Lupin, it�s not like it�d matter if you messed up
your potion. Which you probably will anyway."
Remus didn�t say anything as he diligently copied the potions ingredients
from the board, where Professor Durkham had listed them before class began.
"Aw, what�s wrong? Is little Lupin afraid to admit that I�m right?" Snape
sneered, reaching forward and taking Remus� quill from his hand. Remus
turned, visibly acknowledging Snape for the first time, and tried to take
his quill back. Snape raised his arm, teasing the brown-haired boy with the
object, and smirked. "C�mon, Lupin. Let�s see a freak try and get his
precious quill back. Did your Mummy buy it for you?"
"Of course she did, Severus; who else would have? Now give it back," was
Remus� calm, unraveled response as he glared evenly at Snape.
"You have to come and get it, Lupin," taunted Snape. Sirius snarled
softly as he came closer, irritated by Snape�s obnoxious tone.
Coming to a halt by Remus� desk, Sirius snapped, "Give him back his
quill, you slimy git."
"Oh, look!" Snape smirked as Sirius, James, and Peter glared at him,
looking amused. "Lupin�s bodyguards came to help him. Isn�t that cute?"
"Really cute," Avery supported, and he reached forward to snatch Remus�
Potions book. Flipping open the cover, he read, "�Property of Remus J. Lupin.�
How adorable, Lupin; did you get it second-hand?"
"Give it back, please," instructed Remus calmly, though Sirius could tell
that he was getting agitated by the way his right hand clenched into a fist
on his desk.
"What�s wrong?" Snape asked snidely, addressing Sirius, "Do all of you
act as a single unit now? Whenever one is in trouble, the other three
immediately come to help? How sweet."
Sirius rolled his eyes. "At least we don�t all share a brain like your
lot."
"No, you just share a�"
Snape�s response (which Sirius knew must have been extremely clever and
innovative, of course) was sadly cut off by the appearance of Professor
Durkham, who glared bitterly down at the two groups of boys.
"What is going on here?" Durkham snarled irritably, his thick, bushy
eyebrows narrowed in annoyance.
Before anyone else could say anything (or blame anyone), Remus replied
with, "They have my things, Professor."
Snape rolled his eyes and glared at Remus, dropping the quill on the
desk. Avery did the same with the book.
"Sit down, then, all of you," ordered Durkham, looking less than pleased
that the Gryffindor boys weren�t doing anything. Sirius rolled his eyes as
he turned and followed James and Peter back to their seats; Durkham wouldn�t
have brushed them off if Sirius had stolen Remus� book (not that he would
have, of course.) But no, Durkham loved Snape, so that was that. What a dumb
teacher.
Durkham started class quickly, telling the class to pull out their quills
and rolls of parchment for a series of note-taking ("Oh, joy," James had
muttered sarcastically to Sirius, looking exasperated.) The lesson consisted
of them listening to Durkham�s low, gravely voice harp on and on about how
it�s imperative that certain substances do not meet one another, especially
not during the lesson tomorrow, when they would be mixing at least two
different potions that had some ingredients that were highly reactive to
each other. Luckily, the fact that he was lecturing meant that Durkham
didn�t have much time to take off points from the students, and through that
miracle, Sirius and James only got five points taken away from them that
day, from the one time Durkham had caught them whispering to one another.
The best thing was that he didn�t notice them tossing a timed dungbomb for
his next hour (fourth-year Ravenclaws and Hufflepuffs) to find.
All in all, it was a fairly decent class. If only Sirius had been able to
get Snape back for what he said about Remus, then it would have been better.
But no, Snape had gotten away scot-free, because Durkham was a biased jerk,
and even after class was over, Snape immediately went up to Durkham to
"talk" about something. And of course, Sirius couldn�t curse him in front of
teacher; and it would look too stupid (and suspicious, for that matter) for
him to wait for the greasy-haired git outside the door. So, of course,
Sirius had just stalked off to lunch, still aggravated that Snape had
avoided paying for what he said.
James, Remus, and Peter were with him, of course, and they noticed as he
stabbed at his plate of spaghetti with unusual malice. Well, actually, no,
only James noticed � Peter had cast a charm on his fried potatoes to make
them more spicy (or, at least, that was what the book said it did, Peter had
told them as he tried to do it), and was now prodding them cautiously with
his fork. Remus, for his part, was looking thoughtfully at his plate of
fried rice and greens, not paying attention to much of anything. Sirius had
briefly wondered what it was before remembering Snape�s comment and knowing
that Remus didn�t like being reminded of his less than well-off state. This,
of course, served to anger Sirius again, which caused James to notice Sirius
acting oddly, which resulted in James poking Sirius in the arm with his
fork.
"Ow, geez," Sirius muttered, glaring spitefully at James as he took a big
bite of his noodles. Through the mouthful, he asked, "Whagt wash �hagt fer?"
"Huh?"
Sirius swallowed. "What was that for?"
"What�s bothering you?" James asked, frowning at his friend.
"Nothing," Sirius replied, and went back to shoveling another forkful of
spaghetti into his mouth. Chewing slowly, he looked up at James, who was now
staring at him with a deadpan expression on his face. Sirius swallowed,
realizing that James wasn�t likely to give up on the issue, rolled his eyes
and said, "Fine. I�m annoyed about what Snape said to Remus. We need to get
him back for that."
"You�re right," agreed James, nodding and looking quite relieved that
Sirius wasn�t actually upset or anything relatively bad. Being mad at Snape
wasn�t a big thing, nor was it a cause for concern; in fact, if Sirius
hadn�t been annoyed with Snape, then James probably would have a reason to
be worried. But now that Sirius� cause of irritability was brought into the
open, James visibly relaxed, knowing just how to handle the situation at
hand. "We need to make him pay for saying that."
"But it has to be good, of course," began Sirius, brightening
considerably at the prospect of a good prank. "I mean, it�s our first bad
deed of the year. We need to make sure that it�s memorable."
"Definitely," agreed James, nodding vigorously, "We simply cannot have a
performance that�s less than spectacular."
By this time, Remus and Peter had separated themselves from their
respective distractions and were looking at Sirius and James with various
levels of intrigue.
"A prank, you say?" Peter asked, a sly grin appearing on his broad face.
"Excellent! Against Snape?"
Remus, of course, was a bit more apprehensive about it. "Look, if this is
about what he said, I�m fine; he didn�t bother me--"
"He bothered me," Sirius explained, but as that didn�t seem to be enough
to make Remus stop looked tentative, he continued humorously with,
"Everything about that guy bothers me! His greasy hair, his outrageously
huge nose, his skinny, wimpy appearance, his--"
"We get it," James dead-panned, rolling his eyes.
"As a fellow skinny, wimpy type person, I am almost offended, however,"
added Remus, who Sirius could tell had been won over by the glint of
mischief in his eye.
"Oh, no, Remus," assured Sirius, "you aren�t in the same category. Your
skinny, wimpiness is a cool type. Snape�s is just a pathetic, whiny type.
You don�t whine, do you?"
"It just wouldn�t be right for anyone in our group to whine," James
supported, "We�re much more classy than that."
Remus rolled his eyes and sighed, though his stifled laugh showed that he
was clearly amused. "Anyway..."
"Right!" proclaimed Sirius, pounding one fist into his hand, "The prank!
First one of the year, it�s gotta be good. And it�s against Snape, so it has
to be particularly menacing and cruel."
There was a long pause after Sirius said that, as each of the boys looked
at one another with expectancy. After a few moments of silence, a new,
common knowledge came over them all.
"Don�t tell me we don�t have any ideas..." Sirius sighed, slumping in his
hair and burying his face in his hands.
"Um, it�s the new school year?" offered Peter for explanation, "Or maybe
we can�t just force ideas out of each other, y�know? We need inspiration."
"Inspiration!" repeated Sirius with mock incredulity, "What could be more
inspirational than lunch, where the slimy Slytherins are in clear view for
everyone to see? Not only that, but Professor Durkham is, at this moment,
glaring at Professor McGonagall, which is all but a spoken challenge between
our houses."
All four boys turned to look at the teacher�s table, where -- sure enough
-- Durkham was glaring with irritation at McGonagall, who was obviously
replying to one of his comments in her knowledgeable, pompous sort of way.
Looking back at one another, Sirius nodded once to confirm his suspicions.
"All right," Remus began, "So everything is ready for a gigantic,
unbelievably shocking prank. We�ve got that. What we don�t have is the idea
for one."
"Maybe Peter�s right," suggested James, "We should just walk around for
inspiration or something. Let�s finish lunch quick; we have a free period,
so that�s a good hour at least."
"I guess," muttered Sirius, looking slightly downcast that they weren�t
ready to start planning everything. "But it�d better work."
__________________________
"Any ideas yet?" murmured Remus lazily from his spot near the window.
"No," Sirius grumbled in response, slumping lower in the armchair that he
was currently resting in. After lunch, the four boys had left the Great Hall
with the purpose of searching for inspiration for a new, particularly
vengeful prank. Unfortunately, that was before James remembered that he had
forgotten to pack a few of his books, and had dashed to the Owlery to send
home for them, dragging Peter with him ("Because his owl is much faster than
those lame school owls," James had explained rapidly at Sirius� frown, "and
besides, you and Remus can figure something out.") So Sirius and Remus had
been left to trudge up to the Gryffindor common room, where Remus was now
standing, half-alseep, by the window and Sirius was annoyed about getting
nowhere on any pranking opportunities.
"This bloody bites," muttered Sirius, sitting up and leaning over the top of
the chair to face Remus. "I mean, really! Last year we had dozens of ideas
for pranks. Almost too many, if that is even possible. But now? Now we can�t
even come up with a vague outline for one. It�s so pathetic."
"You can�t force inspiration, Sirius," Remus advised calmly, staring out the
window with half-closed eyes, looking as if he wished for an afternoon nap.
"It�s something that just comes, I think."
Sirius groaned, laying melodramatically across the back of the chair. "Well,
why can�t it come faster?"
"Just try and picture Snape or something," was Remus� advice as the
brown-haired boy turned away from the window and watched Sirius� actions
with a small smirk on his face.
"Um, no, I see enough of the git in class, thanks."
"That�s not what I meant!" explained Remus, giving Sirius a look that
clearly said that he should really shut up and listen. "I mean, focus on
your objective. We want to prank Snape, right? So picture Snape, and then
think of the funniest thing that could happen to humiliate him."
Sirius grinned. "Oh, I get it -- just do the same thing I do in class when
he�s always going on about how--"
"Exactly," Remus cut him off, and then looked out the window again. There
was a moment�s pause, in which Sirius tried to do what Remus suggested and
failed (finding that it was much harder to do without the object of one�s
disgust in view.) Remus didn�t say anything during that time, but soon he
added, "Or we could go visit Hagrid."
"Oh?" responded Sirius, "What made you think of that?"
Remus pointed out the window. "I think Lily Evans is going there now." Sure
enough, as Sirius leaned forward enough to look out the window, he could see
a flash of golden-red hair down on the grounds, heading towards Hagrid�s
hut. "Besides, I�m tired of just sitting here and contemplating Snape�s
humiliation," Remus added, shrugging. "We�ll think of something soon enough,
right?"
"I suppose," murmured Sirius in response, looking pensively out the window
as he watched Lily step up to the door on Hagrid�s hut and knock politely.
Though the idea of talking to Hagrid had its appeal, Sirius couldn�t help
but think that they really should be plotting their revenge on Snape. It was
Snape, after all, who deserved plenty of humiliation as soon as
manageable. Besides, even if they didn�t have any ideas, surely sitting in
the common room would be preferable to spending time with a girl. Lily
Evans, no less, who was somewhat of a know it all, and who didn�t like it
when he and James goofed off in class; and who was constantly giggling with
her other girl friends, which was really annoying to the rest of them.
Sirius had no use for girls; they were dainty and pretty and never knew how
to have any fun. He had said as such to his mother awhile back, when she had
told him that he should really go play with his female cousins, and she had
told him that he should wait, and then he�d like them. But Sirius doubted
it; he hadn�t liked girls for all of his twelve years of life and he wasn�t
planning on starting any time soon. Girls didn�t do anything fun, after all;
they never wanted to get dirty or play jokes or do anything short of hosting
dumb tea parties. And the girls at school were worse, because they all
walked around in little groups and giggled. Giggled! What was the point of
that, anyway? If you were going to laugh, you should laugh loudly. Not
giggle lightly like a bunch of tittering little mice. Bloody girly mice.
Unfortunately, Sirius mused as he saw the door to Hagrid�s hut open and Lily
Evans step in lightly, Remus was one of those guys who pretended to have a
use for girls. This had made him very popular among said girls after the
first few weeks of school in the first year, because he was more than
willing to stand up for anyone getting harassed, even the girls. So all the
giggling little females had adopted Remus as their stand-in hero, and Remus
had actually made the effort to speak to some of them. He was even friends
with some of them, Lily included, which made Sirius wonder just what was
going on in Remus� mind. A friend of girls, indeed. How did he stand it?
"So?" Remus was asking, breaking Sirius from his thoughts, "Do you want to
go down there? I want to ask Lily what she thought of Professor Anthony,
anyway."
Aha! The perfect opportunity!
"Why are you friends with Lily, anyway?" Sirius asked, forcing as much
incredulity into his voice as he could. "I mean, she�s a girl. What good are
girls, anyway?"
Remus stared at Sirius blankly, trying to comprehend what Sirius meant by
his comment. Obviously at a loss, he asked, "What on Earth are you talking
about Sirius? I�ve been friends with Lily since last year."
"I know that, but why?" repeated Sirius. "She�s not any fun or anything."
"She�s very nice," said Remus neutrally, pinning Sirius with an even stare,
his golden eyes flickering slightly. "Now do you want to go to Hagrid�s or
not? I�m going."
"Sure, whatever," muttered Sirius, getting up and following Remus out the
door of the common room, hands in the pockets of his robes. They were quiet
for awhile, but as they were passing the kitchens (or, rather, the picture
that led into the kitchens), Sirius continued, "It�s not like you hang out
with her or anything."
Remus sighed slightly, apparently having wanted to drop the topic.
Patiently, he responded, "Look, I met her at the Sorting Ceremony, because
we had to ride the boat together beforehand. I was really nervous about it,
and so was she, and well... we just started talking. She thought she was
going to be in Ravenclaw."
"Oh?" Sirius asked, suddenly interested. He liked hearing about people�s
thoughts about the Hogwarts houses, especially since he himself had been
curious about it; his family had equal experience in both Gryffindor and
Hufflepuff, so it was somewhat of a toss-up for him. James, of course, had
known that he was going to be in Gryffindor (his entire family was, going
back for ages), and even though Sirius could tell he was a little nervous,
he had adamantly denied it, because he was rather stubborn. "I didn�t know
that."
"That�s because you�ve never spoken to her," Remus stated as they stepped
out the doors and onto the Hogwart�s grounds. It was a very nice day out;
the sun was warm on their backs and the air had a cool breeze in it as they
walked towards Hagrid�s hut. "She�s a muggle-born, too, so she didn�t know
the differences between the houses before I told her about them."
"What house did you think you were going to be in?" Sirius asked, looking at
Remus with an inquisitive expression on his face.
Remus� face flushed slightly, looking a bit embarrassed. He waited a second
before murmuring softly, "Anything but Slytherin. I was terrified that I was
going to be in Slytherin, because I had heard that they were all... you
know, evil."
"Ugh, who would want to be in Slytherin, anyway?" Sirius agreed, ignoring
the somewhat pained look on Remus� face. He was going to say more, but at
that moment they arrived at Hagrid�s door. Remus stepped up to knock, but
before he did they heard noise coming from behind Hagrid�s shack.
Sirius looked at Remus with raised eyebrows; Remus shrugged and moved to
look behind the small house. There, Hagrid was talking with Professor
Kettleburn and Lily was looking into a pen, cooing at whatever it was that
was in there.
"� really quite magnificent," Professor Kettleburn was saying, looking over
Lily�s shoulder into the pen. "I�m happy with the numbers we have this year;
sometimes I have problems with the breeding and we�re short, but this year
we should have plenty."
"Yeh don�t have ta worry, Professor, they�re safe wit� me," Hagrid assured,
grinning at the things in the pen. "Feisty little buggers, ain�t they?"
"Oh, yes, they� oh, hello." Kettleburn just noticed Sirius and Remus
standing there, looking curious, and he turned to face them. "I don�t think
I know you two."
Hagrid and Lily turned to face them, and suddenly, Sirius felt a bit
embarrassed for interrupting them. Still, they had noticed them, so Sirius
just grinned and greeted, "Hi."
"Hello, Hagrid, Lily, Professor," murmured Remus kindly, sounding much more
polite and well-mannered than Sirius had. Then again, Remus was one of those
people who were endlessly polite, so Sirius wasn�t exactly surprised by his
brown-haired friend�s reply.
"Sirius! Remus!" Hagrid greeted loudly, smiling and stepping back to allow
the two of them into the semi-circle that surrounded the pen. "Haven�t seen
yeh two since last winter."
"Been busy," replied Sirius, grinning. He remembered when they had last
spoken to Hagrid; it was just after they had gotten into a fierce snowball
fight with a group of Slytherins and had clobbered them. Unfortunately, then
they had gotten cheap and started cursing the snowballs, so he, James, Peter
and Remus had dashed to Hagrid�s hut for safety. James had gotten hit by a
snowball with a laughing hex on it, so the entire time he was snickering
uncontrollably, even when Hagrid�s pet dog Fang had started eating his hat.
"What�s in the pen?" asked Remus, stepping closer and giving Lily a small
grin. The red-haired girl waved back at him, moving over to give him and
Sirius room beside her
"Nifflers," Kettleburn answered proudly as Remus and Sirius stepped forward
to look over the side of the pen. "Brilliant little creatures. They are
irresistibly attracted to gold, so they sniff out anything golden and dig it
up for you."
Brilliant wasn�t exactly the word Sirius would have used to describe the
small, dog-like creatures in the pen, even if they were gold-diggers. It was
a large area, and all around there were various holes in the ground,
obviously made by the Nifflers� large, odd-looking paws. There were quite a
few of the creature in the cage, most of them yipping around and chasing
each other. To his side, Sirius felt Remus back off a bit, and looked back
to see Remus standing an arm�s length away from the pen, his expression
blank.
Sirius raised an eyebrow. "Don�t like dogs?" he questioned Remus.
Remus looked a bit embarrassed, and he moved closer in, replying, "Kind of,
I guess. But they aren�t really dogs, so I don�t suppose..." He trailed off,
moving back to the side of the pen and looking over the edge curiously.
"They are a lot like dogs, actually," Professor Kettleburn said eagerly
sounding very much like a teacher at the moment. His nearly black eyes were
lit with genuine interest as he went on, "They possess most of the natural
canine instincts, for one, and they are usually quite friendly towards
humans. Not like wolves, who are by nature wary of humans, but Nifflers are
like most of the canine species."
"Oh," Remus commented lightly.
Lily grinned over at him and Sirius, smiling as she asked, "Aren�t they just
adorable?"
"Oh yeah, really sweet," Sirius commented, trying to keep his sarcasm to a
minimum as he watched the little creatures chase one another around the pen.
Two of them got into a brief fight just in front of the pen, and Sirius
grinned. "They really are feisty, aren�t they?" he murmured to himself,
silently cheering the bigger of the two pups on.
"Oh, Professor, could we go play with them?" Lily was asking, her green eyes
wide and pleading. "They look so lonely."
"Well�" Kettleburn began, looking apprehensive.
"Please, Professor?" Lily asked again, clenching her hands in front of her.
"We won�t hurt them!"
"Yeah, Professor," Sirius supported, nodding. He had always liked dogs �
they were good, dependable creatures, always right for having a little fun.
So going into the pen would be plenty fun, and suddenly, Sirius found that
he really did want to play with the little buggers. And if girls were only
good for one thing, Sirius decided, it was most definitely being able to
charm teachers, because Kettleburn gave in almost instantly.
"But I�m not sure how taken they�ll be with you," Kettleburn said, reaching
into the pocket of his robes for the key to the pen. Hagrid had left the
area and gone back into his hut, so it was just the four of them sitting
around the pen at that time. "They apparently had a bad experience with
humans when they were little � in the care of a few graduates; very
irresponsible, they were � and I made things worse when I went to go pick
them up a week ago. Accidentally stepped on the big one�s tail; they haven�t
trusted me since."
As Kettleburn moved forward to open the pen, Lily asked, "Are they mad about
that or something?"
"No, no, just untrustworthy," explained Kettleburn. "I�m not sure how
they�ll take to you, actually. It�s something of a problem, because if the
Nifflers aren�t willing to work with humans, it�s going to be rather hard to
go over them in class." The lock on the door clicked, and Kettleburn stepped
into the pen. "Here you are, then." He gestured for the three of them to
follow.
Sirius stepped in first after Kettleburn, noticing as he did the way nearly
all of the Nifflers had moved to the opposite side of the cage and were now
regarding the new visitors with wary eyes. Lily stood beside him, and as
Sirius looked at her, he could tell that she was upset by the way the little
creatures were avoiding them.
"See what I mean?" Kettleburn asked, leaning against the side of the pen and
sweeping his arm towards the pups. "They don�t like humans. Usually,
Nifflers are a very friendly sort, but those blasted graduates messed
everything up. I have no idea how I�m going to walk them, and they can�t be
penned in all the time. It�s a bit of a mess, really."
Sirius vaguely listened to Kettleburn�s rant, but his attention was mainly
focused on the little creatures on the opposite side of the pen.
Tentatively, he stepped forward and held out his hand, having heard from
somewhere that if a dog is wary of you, you should let him sniff you before
approaching him. One of the pups came forward slightly and Sirius moved
forward slowly, making sure that he got a big whiff of his hand.
Unfortunately, upon sniffing him, the canine barked and growled slightly;
Sirius jumped back as Lily gasped behind him.
"Ah, don�t worry about that," Kettleburn said, laying a hand on Sirius�
shoulder. "They aren�t vicious at all. I bet you just got too close too
soon. Still, if only they weren�t so afraid of humans, then maybe..."
Sirius heard a shuffle behind him, and turned to see Remus standing at the
gate, not having stepped into the pen. He didn�t look afraid, merely
curious, but he maintained his distance from the rest of them. Sirius
frowned slightly, and he called out, "C�mon, Remus. They�re okay."
"That�s all right," Remus responded, smiling gently. "I�d rather not risk
it."
"Honestly, you�re a Gryffindor!" Sirius said, acting outraged. He walked
over to Remus and grabbed him tightly on the arm, tugging his friend away
from the fence. "You heard Professor Kettleburn; they aren�t dangerous or
anything. And they�re cute." The last bit was added somewhat sarcastically,
and despite himself, Remus rolled his eyes at Sirius, amused.
"Really, though," commented Remus as Sirius dragged him forward, looking
apprehensive, "I � I don�t get along well with dogs �"
"They aren�t dogs, they�re Nifflers!" Sirius corrected, smirking at Remus as
they approached the pups.
Lily looked at Sirius with a half-worried, half-reprimanding expression on
her face. "Sirius, if he doesn�t want to see them, you really shouldn�t make
him�"
"Oh, shut it, you," muttered Sirius, trying his best to ignore the fact that
a girl was telling him what to do.
"Sirius--!" Remus began, but at that moment they were close enough to the
pups for them to smell them. Without any warning, Sirius pushed Remus
forward lightly and stepped back, leaving Remus standing about five feet
away from the group of Nifflers. After all, Sirius figured, if Remus really
was afraid of dogs � which was a really stupid fear, Sirius thought � then
he should face it. At least, that was how he approached any fears of his, so
why should Remus be any different?
Actually, Remus didn�t look very frightened by the prospect of being so
close to the Nifflers; rather, he looked a bit perplexed at why Sirius had
pushed him, as well as a little nervous. The surprising thing was the way
the Nifflers reacted: instead of backing away and barking, like they had
with Sirius, the pups suddenly broke away from their apprehension and
trotted up to Remus cheerfully, yipping and acting excited.
Sirius gaped, watching as the puppies surrounded Remus and starting licking
him and nuzzling his legs, much to Remus� digress.
"Oh, how sweet!" Lily murmured, eying the hyperactive puppies with an
appreciative expression on her face. "They like you, Remus!"
"Amazing!" Kettleburn said, a grin appearing instantly on his weather-worn
face. "They haven�t been so active with a human for quite some time; how
astonishing. You must have a way with animals, Remus!"
Remus didn�t seem to think it was so amazing; in fact, he looked startled by
the way the animals had reacted and then alarmed as they attempted to play
with him. Looking back at Sirius, he pleaded, "Help me!"
Sirius grinned. "Hey, they don�t like me."
"You � you-!" was Remus� attempt at a furious response, but it died out
before he finished. Instead, he started petting the Nifflers begrudgingly,
who all looked very excited that he was paying attention to them. More than
one of the dog-like creatures leaned forward on their front paws, an
expression Sirius knew meant, "Play with me!"
"I�m impressed, Remus," Kettleburn said admirably, stepping forward
slightly. "Not very many people have a touch for Care of Magical Creatures,
and I think that you just might�"
"What�s happenin�?" a voice asked, and they all turned to see Hagrid
standing outside the pen, a large mug held in his large grip. Noticing the
Nifflers, his eyebrows raised and he said, "I though� yeh said they were
wary of humans yet, Professor."
"I thought so, but Remus here seems to have a touch with them," Kettleburn
said excitedly, standing a good five feet away from the said boy, as to not
distract the Niffler pups. Turning back to Remus, he asked, "I didn�t quite
catch your last name there, son."
"Ah, that�s Remus Lupin, Professor," Hagrid suddenly cut in, looking oddly
alarmed. "�E�s a second-year, Remus Lupin."
Sirius didn�t know why Hagrid had answered for Remus, but suddenly
Kettleburn�s expression turned from excited to inquisitive. Then, briefly
flashing with realization, Kettleburn said, "Oh... Oh."
"Oh, what, Professor?" Lily asked, looking at Kettleburn with a wide-eyed,
curious expression. Sirius, casting a furtive glance at Remus, saw the
brown-haired boy tense up, his face pale as he mechanically continued to pet
the Nifflers. Sirius frowned as he looked back at Kettleburn; had one of
their pranks gone so far as to have a Professor they didn�t even know be
aware of their names?
"Nothing," Kettleburn responded a bit too quickly. After a bit of a pause,
Kettleburn�s eyebrows rose and he asked Lily, "Second-year, are you?
Shouldn�t you be getting to class, then?"
"Pardon?" Lily asked, blinking in surprise. Then, remembering, she gasped,
"Oh, you�re right! We have Charms!"
"Oh, great, just when things get exciting," Sirius grumbled, crossing his
arms. "I thought we could play with the Nifflers�"
"We can�t miss our first Charms class!" Lily told him with an astonished
expression on her face, as if she couldn�t even imagine the thought of it.
"Yeah, yeah," was Sirius� answer, rolling his eyes. "C�mon then, Remus."
"Ah � yes," agreed the brown-haired boy, turning away from the Nifflers
(with some difficulty, as the pups didn�t seem to want to let him leave) and
walking up to Sirius. The Nifflers stopped as soon as Sirius was a few feet
away from them, suddenly wary again, but quite a few of them whined, upset
at having lost their playmate.
"Yeh better get going," Hagrid said as they exited the pen, placing a large
hand on Remus� shoulder. "I don�t imagine Professor Flitwick wants yeh ta be
late."
"Okay, then," Sirius responded. "See you later, Hagrid! Professor Kettleburn!"
Remus and Lily said their farewells as well, and soon the three of them were
walking quickly back to the castle, Lily checking a little watch on her
wrist they went ("Magically powered," she informed them, at Sirius� confused
stare.) They arrived at Charms, breathless but on time, and Sirius dragged a
still quiet Remus to the back of the room, where James and Peter were
already seated.
______________________________
"So what happened?" questioned James, leaning over so Sirius could
hear him as he continued to meticulously take notes. In the front of the
room, Professor Flitwick was droning onwards about something or other, of
which Sirius (to be quite frank) had no real interest. Not to say that
Charms was boring, but... no, wait, Charms was boring. Never mind.
Besides, it was the first class of the year. Barely anything happened during
the first class of the year, and Sirius had resolved that if he heard any
Latin that he hadn�t already memorized, he�d listened. As that hadn�t
happened, Sirius was still cleverly lost in reverie. Or at least he was,
until James had started chiding him for being late, which he felt obliged to
explain.
"Professor Kettleburn � y�know, the weird one with all the scars � said that
Remus must have some kind of talent or whatever with magical creatures,"
Sirius explained in undertone, pretending to take notes for the sake of the
conversation. "Which is brilliant, if you think about it, because that could
help with some pranks or something later on. Y�know?"
"Yeah, I get it," assured James quietly, nodding slightly and giving Sirius
a wide grin. Then, the smile slowly vanishing, James pondered, looking
slightly confused, "I though Remus didn�t like dogs, though."
"He doesn�t," Sirius confirmed. "I pushed him into the pen."
James rolled his eyes and sighed dramatically, giving Sirius an exasperated
look. "Why�d you do that? If he doesn�t like dogs�"
"�then he should face his fear and get over it," Sirius finished, nodding as
if it was obvious. "He can�t avoid them forever, right? And besides, they
loved him."
"They... they did?" James looked incredulous as he regarded Sirius, taking a
quick glance over at Remus, who was sitting by Lily and taking notes
diligently. "No way; I always thought they attacked him or something when he
was little."
Sirius frowned. "Why�s that?"
"You ever see that scar on his shoulder?" James questioned, dropping his
voice a notch as Flitwick looked over at them with a disapproving stare. "It
looks like he was attacked by a dog or something. I never asked him about it
or anything, but when Remus said he didn�t like dogs, I just kind of
assumed..."
"Hn," murmured Sirius, "Weird. He didn�t really seem afraid of the dogs or
anything. Just... I don�t know, wary. Or something." Then Sirius grinned,
"Maybe he just doesn�t like the way they look. He always did strike me as
more of a cat person."
"Yeah," agreed James, "We should introduce him to Professor Figg�s kneazles
sometime."
"So that�s really true?" Sirius whispered hastily, knowing full well that
Flitwick probably wouldn�t allow them to talk to each other for much longer
without getting annoyed, especially since Sirius wasn�t even making the
attempt to look like he was taking notes.
"What�s really true?" James asked, jotting down something about Charms being
a key class in their Hogwarts learning experience� well, duh, Sirius
thought, we only take it for seven bloody years � and not looking at
Sirius. "That Remus doesn�t like dogs?"
"No, prat," muttered Sirius, rolling his eyes, "That Figg�s cats are really
kneazles."
"Of course they are," confirmed James, who finished his sentence and shot
Sirius a vaguely irritated glare for the insult. "Christopher said so
himself, and you know how much of a stickler for the truth he is."
Sirius took in the information, knowing full well that Christopher � James�
obnoxious, rule-abiding, and endlessly over-bearing older brother � wouldn�t
make up something about one of the professors. Or even make up something at
all, due to the fact that Christopher�s creative streak essentially ended
when he was five and started drawing pictures of architecture. Having known
Christopher for the better part of his existence, Sirius could safely say
that he was easily the most boring person on Earth.
However, Christopher was honest. So whatever he said was probably true, no
matter how boring he was. (And if James hadn�t also been an honest type of
person, Sirius would have sworn that they couldn�t have been related. Oh,
sure, they looked really similar � same unruly black hair and brown eyes,
even if Christopher didn�t need glasses �, but truly, their personalities
were like night and day. Or, at the very least, night and twilight.) And
luckily, Christopher was a seventh-year prefect � which meant that he was
going to be gone next year, and then they wouldn�t have to worry about being
watched over.
Sirius grinned at James, who was smirking in his direction. "That�s so
cool," he said, eyes lighting up. "I mean, really, kneazles? We should put
them in the Slytherin common room and make them all go haywire."
"That would be kind of pathetic, though," murmured James as his bit the edge
of his quill thoughtfully, "if you�re going to use that for our first prank,
I mean."
"Nah," Sirius denied, shaking his head, "You�re right. It�s too mean to the
kneazles, anyway. We need to think of those poor creatures, after all � how
would you like having to possibly see Snape in pajamas?"
Both boys shuddered at the same time, something that was the result of
having spent practically every day with one another since they were one. It
was a common occurrence to them (and those who knew them) that they would
sometime behave as twins would, and be synchronized with each other and the
like. Sirius was particularly proud of the way he was sometimes able to
predict what James was going to say, as well as the way they were able to
effortlessly play off of each other�s words. It had bothered him a bit �
just a bit, not that much � when Remus had learned to do it, too, but Sirius
chalked it up to the fact that Remus was just a really quick thinker, rather
than him actually being able to predict what might be said. Peter hadn�t
picked up on that talent just yet, but that didn�t matter much to Sirius. It
was still mainly he and James who did it, anyway.
"Ugh," James whispered as soon as he had finished being disgusted, "Snape in
pajamas. I wonder what he wears."
"Probably really dorky ones, like... duckies or something," suggested
Sirius, grinning.
"Or stars."
"Or little puppies."
"Or little dragons EATING the little puppies."
Sirius made a face. "Ew, you�re probably right." Then, after a bit of a
pause, Sirius smirked and offered, "No, I bet his are really dorky. Like,
oh, I dunno, little golden snitches on a red background."
"Hey," James protested, looking offended, "I liked those pajamas. My
Great-Aunt Gertrude made them for me."
This was too much for Sirius, who snorted into his hands as he struggled not
to laugh. "G-Gertrude? Oh, that�s priceless!"
"Oh, shut up�!"
"Boys," a voice snapped suddenly, and both James and Sirius looked up,
identical angelic looks appearing instantly on their faces. Flitwick stood
in front of their table, and even though Sirius couldn�t exactly say that he
was towering over them (he was, of course, only three feet tall or so), he
was certainly making a valiant effort to do so.
"I would appreciate it if you would pay attention to me when I go over
Redolente charms," Flitwick reprimanded them. James, for all his
bragging about how he was able to charm any teacher, looked rather
embarrassed and put-out, and Sirius � surprisingly enough � was also feeling
a bit guilty. "Now, would you please pay attention and stop making it
difficult for the rest of us?"
With that, Flitwick turned around and continued to teach. From behind him,
Sirius could hear Lily Evans whisper, "Serves them right."
Annoyed, Sirius whipped around as soon as Flitwick�s back was turned and
snapped, "Stuff it, Lily, just because we�re not goody-two-shoes like you�"
"Turn around," hissed Lily, her green eyes flickering with irritation.
Seated beside her, Remus watched the quarrel with wide eyes, looking both
bemused and nervous. "We�re supposed to be listening."
"I was just going to ask Remus to copy his notes," Sirius explained
smoothly, creating the cover story off the top of his head. Lily frowned,
looking indignant, and Sirius looked over at Remus, "Can I, Rem?"
"Sure, I guess,"agreed Remus, though he looked slightly disapproving as he
handed Sirius the parchment. As Sirius turned around, he saw Remus shrug
apologetically at Lily, who had turned her frown towards him. Serves her
right, Sirius thought, for trying to be such a teacher�s pet...
Glancing at the sheet of parchment he had retrieved from Remus, Sirius
passed by most of the writing because it was trivial stuff, like important
dates for the rest of the year and such. This stuff didn�t concern Sirius,
of course, because he figured that he�d hear about the stuff plenty of times
before they actually occurred. And then there was stuff about Charms class
itself, which was pretty much useless, unless Sirius was planning on
becoming a Charms professor or something � which he most certainly wasn�t.
Finally, near the bottom of the page, was a bunch of notes on Redolente
charms, written neatly in Remus� small, cramped handwriting:
Redolente charms (also known as Smelling charms, or Perfume charms)are
commonly used among most young witches as a substitute for Muggle perfumes
or added scents. Most Redolente charms last up to 12 hours before the charm
wears off.
Sirius rolled his eyes; who really cared about stupid perfume charms anyway?
Though, he thought, it probably explained why Lily was so eager to listen in
on class. Sighing, Sirius picked up his quill and a spare piece of parchment
and began to copy down Remus� notes, including the list of the most common
scents used through Redolente charms.
By the time Sirius had finished recording all of his missed notes onto his
own sheet of parchment, the lesson was very near completion and Flitwick was
just about to hand out homework. Fortunately, before he could, a knock came
at the door and Professor Kettleburn stuck his head in, looking a bit more
grisly than usual.
"Ah, Professor Kettleburn," Flitwick said with a smile, halting his lecture
mid-speech. "What brings you to the Charms classroom? Oh, class, by the way,
this is Professor Kettleburn, the Care of Magical Creatures professor. He�ll
be teaching a great deal of you come next year."
Kettleburn gave Flitwick a half-hearted smile before stating, "I don�t mean
to bother you, Professor, but I would like to speak with Mr. Lupin for a
moment, if that�s not too much."
Sirius blinked and looked over at James, who seemed to be just as confused
as he was. As one, they turned to look at Remus, whose face was carefully
neutral as he picked up his books and walked to the front of the classroom,
where he and Kettleburn exited the room.
Flitwick resumed his lesson, apparently unperturbed by the odd happenings,
but Sirius ignored him. Knowing that he would probably get detention if
Flitwick caught him speaking with James again, Sirius scribbled a hasty note
to his best friend: What do you think that was about?
He shoved it over to James, who read it over once and replied almost
instantly. I don�t know � maybe it has to do with the Nifflers?
Sirius frowned, then wrote: We didn�t hurt them or anything.
James read this last note, paused, and then shrugged over at Sirius. Just
then, the bell toned, and James stuffed the piece of parchment into one of
his pockets. Now able to voice his concerns, James responded, "Who knows? I
bet Remus just left his books down at Hagrid�s or something."
"We never went in his house," Sirius began as he, James, and Peter exited
the room. James and Peter immediately turned to go down to the Gryffindor
common room (presumably to get started on the Charms assignment, which
Sirius hadn�t even heard), but Sirius suddenly noticed what he had in his
hands. "Oh � wait, I still have Remus� notes."
"Yeah? So?" James asked, pausing and looking back at Sirius. "Just give them
back to him when he gets back."
"No, you go ahead," instructed Sirius, glancing over at the partially open
office door by the Charms classroom, where he could see a bit of Remus�
frayed robes and light brown hair from inside. "I�ll just wait for him � I
want to know what Kettleburn wanted anyway."
James shrugged. "Okay, see you later, then."
"Bye," murmured Peter as he walked after James, waving slightly.
Sirius pulled out Remus� sheet of notes as he walked over to the slightly
ajar door, from which he could hear the voices of Kettleburn and Remus
speaking softly. He was just about to push the door open when he paused, and
instead listened to what they were saying. As he leaned in next to the door,
Sirius could hear Kettleburn�s raspy voice speaking.
"...know it might be an bit of a hassle for you, but they need to be walked,
and they responded so well to you, Mr. Lupin."
"I-- I know," Remus answered, sounding tentative. "I would be happy to walk
the Nifflers, if it would help you."
"I don�t want you to think that I�m using your, um, conditi�"
"Of course not, Professor," interrupted Remus suddenly, sounding a bit
rushed. Sirius� eyebrows raised; he had never heard Remus interrupt a
teacher before, and especially not one who didn�t even have him in class.
From outside the door, he could see Remus� shoulders tense a bit before the
brown-haired boy continued, "I�ll see you tomorrow morning, then?"
"Of course. Thank you very much, Mr. Lupin, I�ll see you then."
Sirius, realizing that he had about two seconds before Remus was going to
come out and see him spying, jumped off to the side of the door just as it
opened more and Remus stepped out. Sirius let Remus take a few steps away
from the door before jumping out beside him � and grinning brightly as Remus
stumbled, startled by Sirius� sudden appearance.
"How long have you been there?" Remus asked, his eyes wide with surprise as
he regarded Sirius.
"Just a few seconds," Sirius answered, cleverly interpreting Remus� question
to mean "How long have you been standing behind me?" rather than "How long
have you been listening?" Grinning, Sirius probed, "So, what did Kettleburn
want?"
Remus relaxed slightly and smiled slightly at Sirius, looking embarrassed.
"He, um, wants me to walk the Nifflers for him."
"That�s cool," Sirius said, raising his eyebrows at his thinner friend. "But
you said you didn�t like dogs."
"That didn�t stop you from shoving me in the pen, now did it?" questioned
Remus as he gave Sirius an even glare. But he grinned at Sirius soon
afterwards, so no animosities were left between them. "And anyway, Professor
Kettleburn asked me, so I couldn�t really say �No�, and he says that they
are being really hyper and agitated lately, so... I just agreed, I guess."
"Awesome," congratulated Sirius as the two of them walked down the hallway
towards the common room. "Wish it was me. I love dogs."
Then Sirius paused, an idea suddenly sparking in the back of his mind. In
front of him, Remus stopped and turned around to stare at him, looking
confused.
"Sirius?" was Remus� concerned prod, "Are you all right?"
"Oh my God," Sirius said, eyes bright with excitement as he looked up at
Remus. Something had just connected in his mind, and he could barely speak
for how great it was. "I got it. I just got it."
"Um," Remus murmured, "Got what, exactly?"
Sirius� grin brightened as he locked eyes with Remus. "I just figured out
the perfect prank on Snape. The absolute most perfect prank."
|