... ummmmm... several justices shy of a full Supreme Court, if you know what I mean.)

Along with his bestest League buddy, Hawkman, the heartsick hero is en route to the former's scientifically advanced homeworld of Thanagar, in order that some sort of cure might be speedily effected on the behalf of the (still-)enraged and raving Jean.

Upon landing on said planet, however, the two heroes are startled to discover that everyone there is acting wack-a-ding-hoy, as well.

Even more distressing, still: just scant moments later -- after successfully fending off an unprovoked attack by several of the natives -- they, too, quickly descend into all-but-gibbering irrationality (giving them more than a little something in common with the script, at this juncture. I'm just sayin', really.)

Fellow Leaguers Superman; the Batman; the Flash; and Black Canary head out to Thanagar, in turn, to determine why they haven't heard from their two crime-fighting chums, of late... and arrive just in time to prevent a wild-eyed Winged Wonder from smashing an unconscious Atom against the bulkhead of his spaceship.

"I can't understand why Hawkman acted so goofy," the Flash opines, in a sterling line of dialogue I'll betcha O'Neil wishes he could take back now, by golly.

"You know..." the Batman responds: "... I'm feeling a bit goofy myself." (And small wonder, really; just get a load of how bloody ridiculous he looks in that space suit...!)

It turns out that everyone in the immediate area (i.e., the surrounding several million light-years or so; give or take a parsec) is having their better judgment fried by this orange-skinned idiot by the name of The Jest-Master, whose shtick is "testing civilizations," due to his own having succumbed, decades past, to "a disease which eroded their brains." (... and, apparently, their fashion sense, as well. I mean: a green-and-purple costume, when you've got orange skin...?!?)

The Atom -- at this point, the only Leaguer still in possession of even a modicum of his own mental marbles -- runs a fast size-and-weight- changing "scam" on the Jest-Master ("Am I two inches tall? Or six inches? Or six feet...?"), causing the alien to believe that he, too, is (finally) coming down with a long-delayed case of The Drools.

Captain Kirk used to do this sort of thing to maniacal, quasi-Messianic alien super-computers all the time, back in the day of the original Star Trek television series. (Sans the spandex, of course.) It's every last bit as pointless and annoying a dramatic "cheat" in this medium as it was in that one.

(William Shatner. Spandex. Brrrrrrrrrrr.)

Moving ahead full speed in reverse: we have the even earlier "Enter: the Creeper" (JUSTICE LEAGUE OF AMERICA #70; March, 1969; Dennis O'Neil, scripter; Dick Dillin, penciler). [See Justice League of America:PAGE FOUR for the already-posted cover scan.]

The (deservedly) legendary comics impresario O'Neil has been (and, doubtless, will long continue to be) lauded for his manifest talents in the arenas of characterization; dialogue; and theme...

... but: "cute," he does not (nor has he ever, really) done well.

The People's Exhibit "A": "The Mind-Grabber Kid."

The Kid was a would-be super-hero; a fledgling telepath and telekinetic; and an all-but-certain shoe-in for top (dis)honors in the 1969 World Cup Classic Goober9000 Competition (Egregious Eyesore Division).

Jealous over the fact that his own low-grade attempts at costumed crime- busting were being overshadowed by those of the more charismatic (and effective) Justice League ("What's so hot about those darn show-offs? Anybody could do that stuff with a power ring... or if he came from Krypton!"), the kid seethed with resentment over his status as a perpetual also-ran. ("My moment of glory... and those finks steal it! Oooo... if only I had a way to get even!")

Meanwhile: the members of the League itself (Superman; the Batman; Green Lantern; the Flash; and the Atom, in this instance) were turning their collective attention towards yet another lower-tier character of the era: the Creeper.

"Someone should settle the Creeper matter, once and for all!" the Batman opines, during the course of a League discussion regarding same. "If he's really crooked, he should be caught!" [NOTE: the Creeper's status as a for-real Good Guy was -- then, as now -- something of an unsettled one, by and large, within the confines of DC's super-heroic community.]

"So I suggest" (the Darknight Detective continues) "that since we have no other pressing cases, we go after him!"

(I love the unintentional "message" here, by the way: "If you are a brand, spanking new costumed crime-fighter within the DCU; and if no other, established super-heroes can "vouch" for you; and IF the Justice League isn't, y'know, busy beating the holy living crap out of the Shaggy Man, or what-have-you... then: We Reserve the God-Given Right To Hassle Your Hinder, Until We're Good'n'Satisfied, By Jingo!" What is this, anyway...the spandexed equivalent of "Sharks-Versus-the-Jets," DC style?!? "You're trespassin' on League turf, bay-bee. Gonna be a rumble, tonight. Mariaaaaa... I just met a girl named Mariaaaaaaa -- !")

... and -- while all of this is going onn, mind -- an absurdly convenient party of alien inter-planetary explorers (who just happen to be passing through our system. Just At That Very Moment, like. Imagine.) are misled by the aforementioned (and still simmering) Mind-Grabber Kid into believing that the heroes of the League are, in fact, crazed and despotic tyrants who've managed to enslave the planet Earth, entire.

Said aliens fall for this line of okey-doke because -- let's face it -- they're just big pinheads, essentially.

No. I mean it.

Literally.

P-I-N-H-E-A-D-S.

All of this to keep straight, mind -- The Jealous Tyro Hero; The Misunderstood (Quasi-)Outlaw Character; and The Credulous Cadre of Alien "Big Brothers," A-Whizzing Their Way Towards Earth -- and we've only just made our way to Page Five.

Good News/Bad News scenario: The Leaguers track down and confront the Creeper while the latter is engaged in a tussle with some low-wattage plainclothes baddies attempting to secure the blueprints for a recently-constructed nuclear power plant. (That's the good news.)

Unfortunately, however: said spandexed summit occurs at almost precisely the same instant as that of the arrival of the Inter-Planetary Imbeciles on the scene. (That would be the bad news, for those of you playing along at home.)

The aliens launch themselves into furious battle versus the startled Leaguers, aided and abetted as they are by their awesome "Meta-Caps." (Which -- according to the accompanying caption, on Page Ten -- are: "Super-scientific devices which instantly analyze a foe's powers... and endow the wearer with identical ones.")

("Powers," that is. Identical powers. Handing out complimentary headgear to your opponents in the heat of pitched battle... now: that would be just plain silly, f'chrissakes. Oh, do at least try to follow along, won't you...?)

Anyway: the aliens proceed to mop up the floor with every Leaguer present except for Superman, whose own awe-inspiring grab-bag of incredibly redundant super-powers causes their big, ugly pin heads to explode, see, and...

... I am NOT lying, dammit!

("Super-Suction"...?!? Oh, Gawd, Dennis: don't go there, man. Please. I'm begging, all right? See? I'm on one knee, here. This is me: begging.)

Well: there's some additional "filler" near the very end, here, involving the Kid's mandatory epiphany, re: his having misled the aliens as to the true nature and purpose of the League, and whatnot ("From now on, I'll cool my envy of others' superiority... and work on making me as good as possible." Sound self-advice, of course. Particularly if he starts out with a refresher course in the rudiments of grammar. I'm just sayin', is all)...

... with the cruelly hoodwinked aliens, in particular, being Darned Good Sports about the whole thing, in particular. ("Quite all right, little humanoid," I can just hear them replying, in kind. "Think nothing of it. So what if you're ultimately responsible for Xagnarr-14's head blowing up, a few pages ago? We never liked him anyway, really. Nice headgear, by the way. Do that yourself, didja...?")

The Mind-Grabber Kid -- to the best of my knowledge, at any rate -- has never made a second appearance between the covers of any DC comic book, anydamnwhere. And I'm certain you're all every bit as heartsick over it as I am.

More nightmarish and unspeakable moments in Justice League history, on Page Two of "HALL OF JUSTICE... OR HALL OF SHAME?" immediately following.... where we'll be focusing on one of the absolute lamest Leaguers of them all, in particular.

The Justice League "Hall of Shame": PAGE TWO

The Justice League "Hall of Shame": PAGE THREE
The Justice League "Hall of Shame": PAGE FOUR