+ = + = + = + = + = +
"Gotta go"
My ex- wife liked my company, at least that's what she said,
till I went out and sold it -then she told me to "drop dead."
+ = + = + = + = + = +
"Strike a light"
To eat by candlelight will give some women quite a thrill
until they find their guy forgot to pay the power bill.
+ = + = + = + = + = +
"Re action"
The best way to provoke response from any man, I'm told,
is say "I'll pay to have it done because you are too old."
+ = + = + = + = + = +
"Cargo"
"What's brought you into hospital?" the nursing sister cried.
"A ruddy great big ambulance". The pensioner replied.
+ = + = + = + = + = +
"Yank"
They say old dentists never die, I ask is that the truth
or is it just because they all get longer in the tooth?"
+ = + = + = + = + = +
" Hot stuff "
"Did you take the patient's Temperature?" they asked nurse McBride
"I didn't even know that it was missing," she replied.
+ = + = + = + = + = +
"Ouch"
The doctor said "Now does it hurt when you do this again?"
The patient moaned & winced. The doc said "Well don't do it then".
+ = + = + = + = + = +
" Bring in the clowns"
What makes a circus different from a singles bar it's true
that at the circus you'll find out the clowns dont talk to you.
+ = + = + = + = + = +
"Hot shot"
What should you give a man who claims that he has everything?
if so then to his birthday party Penicillin bring.
+ = + = + = + = + = +
"Paradise lost"
!9 percent of people get to heaven you should know
for it would be sheer hell if everybody got to go
+ = + = + = + = + = +
"Immunity"
Men can't get mad cow disease, this knowledge I'll impart
because my ex wife still maintains "They're only pigs at heart" .
+ = + = + = + = + = +
" Gold digger"
"I didn't marry him for money ", she was heard to say,
I tried extremly hard but couldn't find another way,
+ = + = + = + = + = +
"Gotta go"
When your guy walks out on you, there's one thing I implore
just show some class, get off your butt & quickly slam the door .
+ = + = + = + = + = +
" Goin home "
What seperates our friend E.T. and husbands when they roam
I find the biggest difference is, at least E.T. phoned home.
+ = + = + = + = + = +
"Forward thinking"
A man's idea of planning for the future so I hear
is ordering not only one, but several crates of beer.