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You know what I hate? People that are overly happy. You can't get them in a bad mood! It's impossible. They've always got this famous quote or saying to keep them cheery. It's like, i'll take a dump on some happy persons' face, and he just says "Well, when life gives you lemons, make lemonade!" and somehow turn this situation into a good thing. No you dumbass, I just took a shit on your face. You wanna know what I do when life gives me lemons? I say "Hey thanks", then I chuck them at a mime until he curls into a fetal position starts fake crying. |
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I mean seriously, there has got to be some built up rage inside of them, because I sure as hell wouldn't be too cheery if someone sqauwked on my face. The other day at school, I had a bad experience with a happy person. I was just walking around, picturing myself shooting up the school, being my usual badass mean self, when all of the sudden some happy faggot came up to me, smiling. Right when he opened his mouth to speak, I slapped him in the face. HARD. Then he just said "Were you seeing if the dentist numbed my mouth, or something? Well, no, haha, he didn't...." then he just continued to happy all over the place. I was fading fast. I was starting to get in a better mood and I couldn't help it. Finally, I thought of a vegan and became the biggest, meanest bastard on the face of the earth. I kicked the happy faggot in the balls and walked away. As I walked away, I heard him say "Nope! I'm not a girl, if that's what you were trying to find out, haha..." now with a super high pussy voice and some tears in his eyes. But, he was still smiling. The sad part of the story is, is that when I kicked him, some happy seeped through my shoe and got on some of my toes. I had to cut them off. I had no choice. |
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