Feeling it take over my thoughts like a black rain cloud here to rain on my parade wanting to scare you away. Push you far away, the small side of me weeping in the background I try to not pay mind to. I keep telling myself I have made my life there is no turning back there no making it better. I keep thinking I am here for a reason and I can't move on till I find it. My small side is in tears wanting you near telling myself over and over you are that reason. I laugh at myself who am I trying to fool I am just a small town girl from the wrong crowd no expectations no high hopes. I am like a field mouse so cute so full of energy but really doing nothing but burrowing in unwanted territory I prided myself not to get trapped not to get brought out scared of realism. I am frozen in a clouded dream not moving forward ready to dart back.
I see you in the distant I look at you and I see everything I can't ever be, Strong full of confidence courage to meet your goal. I see you as an all around American man, ready to please doing only what is expected of you. So I ask why me. Am I that shock value your life is finally needed, am I that girl to set your inner side free? I can't be the one to take a thorn from a lion's foot even if it is in pain. I am only a mouse ready to flee. Let me be set free. I live in a world where dreams are only silly thoughts that never happen
Tears are running down my face, as I know you would wipe them away. Kiss my cheek and hold me tight if you were here. You be the one not to question just understand even when it never makes sense. I hate my thoughts I hate my act. Tough girls don't cry so why am I? It was times like this that made it so easy to turn my back and shut off my heart, numb myself of feeling and step outside the lines. That was then this is now. Your here baby your my lion my courageous lion, your embedded in my mind my heart and my soul. At times like this I feel so weak so many questions so many thoughts. I want to feel your arms Around me and I want to hear you whisper �baby I know your not perfect but your perfectly mine�. Maybe I like listening to the smaller side of me as I hear it calming down. Thinking now of all the reason that this is meant to be. Tilt my head as I gaze at the stars no regrets just allot of silly frets.
J.J Snyder
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