One day in the future, Bill Clinton has a heart attack and dies. He
immediately goes to hell, where the devil is waiting for him. "I don't know
what to do here," says the devil. "You are on my list, but I have no room
for you. You definitely have to stay here, so I'll tell you what I'm going
to do. I've got a couple folks here who weren't quite as bad as you. I'll
let one of them go, but you have to take their place. I'll even let you
decide who leaves."

Clinton thought that sounded pretty good, so the devil opened the first
room. In it was Ted Kennedy and a large pool of water. He kept diving in and surfacing empty handed. Over and over and over. Such was his fate in hell. "No," Bill said. "I don't think so. I'm not a good swimmer and I don't
think I could do that all day long."

The devil led him to the next room. In it was Dick Gephardt with a
sledgehammer and a room full of rocks. All he did was swing that hammer,
time after time after time. "No, I've got this problem with my shoulder.
I would be in constant agony if all I could do was break rocks all day,"
commented Bill.

The devil opened a third door. In it, Clinton saw Jesse Jackson, lying on
the floor with his arms staked over his head, and his legs staked in a
spread eagle pose. Bent over him was Monica Lewinsky, doing what she does
best. Clinton took this in in disbelief and finally said, "Yea, I can
handle this."

The devil smiled and said "OK, Monica, you're free to go!"

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