However, some people get it in their minds that they want me to listen to their midi collection, too, mainly against my will when I'm browsing casually through their webpage. This specific kind of torture is called the ever-dreaded...::cue scary music::...EMBEDDED MIDI FILE.
Look, kiddos. I like listening to MY music, not yours. Your music sucks. Mine doesn't.
The audacity it takes to make someone listen to something because you like it is incredible. It almost rivals the audacity it too George W. Bush to declare a pseudo-war on a country filled with opium and plastic explosives. Nobody CARES if you like a specific song - all they want to do is look at your page. You should be grateful for even THAT much.
Embedded midis increase loading time and frustration. If you have an embedded midi in your page, and your page is being viewed by a PMSing woman who just got out of a three and a half hour traffic jam, there's an 80% chance of that same woman tracking you down and nailing you to the wall with a railroad spike and a baseball bat. Statistics show that annoying synth music that can only be stopped by slamming your speakers into the ground repeatedly is hazardous to your health. Because if I go on your embedded midi-filled page and I'm in a bad mood, I swear to God that I will find you, light you on fire, and laugh maniacally as you frantically roll around on the ground trying to extinguish the flames.
Here is the rant summed up in Algebraic terms:
If Embedded Midis = Satan, and Embedded Midi on Your Page + Pissed Off Person = Death, then you are going straight to Hell, my friend.
Support the way of the righteous. Kill an embedded midi user today.
