Two blondes sat down ahead of me about an hour ago. These two hip guys were at my direct left, a while longer than the said girls. One of the guys is studying Latin while the other talks casually about lighting up a "dewbee" in broad daylight, within this establishment. He is wearing large tinted sunglasses that makes him the missing link between insect and man. He sports a backwards baseball cap and a thuggish diction that could only come from a specimen of urban-white-boy down with black culture kind. Latin boy typlifies the typical college-emo-hipster look; bonus points for the beard. "Emo is to the early 00's as the grunge era was to the early 90's" -I scribble feverishly in my notebook.
Apparently making fun of people is a fruitful way of picking up girls. I'll have to try that sometime. For example, the guys start cracking jokes about the girls. The girls hear and confront the guys. The guys apologize, and the girls invite the guys over. The quintessential guy-meets-girl story, ad nauseam. Latin-emo boy engages a philosophical/religious conversation with the blondes, attempting to charm them with his college educated banter. Vanilla Ice boy speaks fluent ebonics and brags about selling drugs out of his dorm room. Neither of the girls are impressed. Blond A openly disses both guys and I laugh out loud. The debate heats up and everyone is sharing half-baked ideas, feeling their opinions are dead on accurate, and looking past each other in anticipation for their chance to speak.
This whole scene reminds me of people at parties after the keg is crashed and the lucky are off engaging in ungodly acts. Lonely drunks getting together who normally wouldn't converse in daily life, sharing things with each other they wouldn't normally say when sober. All this is a charade. Two guys trying to impress 2 blondes in hopes of getting some action. Unfortunately tonight, belief structures collide and Latin-emo boy resorts to teasing and insults to take the upperhand in a no win situation. I can see the distress in his friends eyes. Shut up man! You're fucking with the plan.
God this is too stupid to watch anymore. Why don't I just get a fucking life? Wait, Ebonics boy looks to me and says "This is fucking stupid." And the emo guy knows me from Bismarck. We supposedly have mutual friends. Great.