Little Suzy raised her hand during a biology lesson and
asked if her grandmother could have a baby. The teacher
was a bit surprised at the question but answered that
the grandmother was too old to have babies.
"So what about my mother?" asked Little Suzy. The
teacher said that it was possible, but that her mother
was probably getting too old to be having babies as well.
"Well, then could I have a baby?" she wanted to know.
"Goodness no!" said the teacher, "you are much too
young."
"See!" yelled Little Johnny from the back of the
classroom, "I told you YOU didn't have anything to worry
about!"
One day the teacher decides to play an animal game.She holds up a picture of a giraffe and asks if anyone knows what it is. No hands are raised, so the teacher says, "See it'slong neck? What animal has a long neck like this?"Sally holds up her hand and says it's a giraffe. "Very good Sally," the teacher replies.Next, the teacher holds up a picture of a zebra. Again,no hands are raised, so the teacher says, "See the stripes on this animal? What animal has stripes like this?" Billy holds up his hand and says it's a zebra. "Very good Billy," the teacher replies. Next, the teacher holds up a picture of a deer. Again, no hands are raised, so the teacher says, "See the big antlers on this animal? What animal has horns like this?"Still no one guesses."Let me give you another hint,"says the teacher. "It's something your mother calls your father."Little Johnny shouts out, "I know what it is -- it's a horny bastard."
Little Johnny is walking with his father in the park and they see two dogs locked in a sexual embrace. Little Johnny not understanding what the dogs are doing asks his father, "Daddy, what are those two dogs doing? To which the father replies, "They are making a puppy!"
Later that night Johnny wakes up and walks down the hall to his parents bedroom and catches his mother and father making love. Johnny asks his father, "Daddy what are you and mommy doing?" To which the father replies, "Johnny we are making you a little sister." Johnny thinks for a few moments and responds, "Well, daddy could you roll her over? I`d rather have a puppy!"
A man suspected his wife of seeing another man so he hired a famous Chinese detective to watch and report any activities while he was gone. A few days later he received this report: Most honorable sir:
You leave the house. I watch house. He comes to house. I watch. He and she leave house. I follow. He and she get on train. I follow. He and she go in hotel. I climb tree-look in window. He kiss she. She kiss he. He strip she. She strip he. He play with she. She play with he. I play with ME. Fall out of tree, not see. NO FEE.
Laloo, Jayalalitha, and Sonia are on a long flight in an Air Force plane. Laloo pulls out a 100 Rupee note and says, "I'm going to throw this Rs.100 note out and make someone down below happy." Jayalalitha, not wanting to be outdone, says, "If that was my 100 Rupee note, I would split it into two Rs.50 notes, throw them down and make two people down below happy."Of course Sonia doesn't want these two candidates to out do her so she pipes in, 'I would instead take one hundred Rs.1 notes and throw them out to make 100 people just a little happier. At this point the pilot, who has overheard all this bragging and can't stand it anymore, comes out and says, "If I throw all three of you out of this plane and I'll make 975 million people happy!"
A waitress walks up to the table of three Japanese men at a New York City restaurant. When she gets to the table, she notices that the three men are furiously masturbating! She asks, "What the heck are you perverts doing?" To which one of the men replied, "We berry ungry!" She responds, "So, why are you whacking off?" One of the three guys says, "Because menu say, first come first served!"
