Author: Cerulean Blue
Title: Trouble in Paradise
Rating: PG13
Disclaimer: I don't own Qui-Gon. If I did, I'd use him as my own personal
relations counselor. I don't own Obi-Wan. If I did, I'd throw him on the
floor and shag him senseless. I own Erynne. She's one hundred percent my
thoughts.
Summary: After being kicked out of his own apartment, Obi-Wan goes to
Qui-Gon for a little advice on how to handle the ladies.
AN: This is just a short little thing inspired by a Harry Potter fic I've
been reading. Enjoy!
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"I swear, Qui-Gon. She's going to be the death of me." Qui-Gon stifled a
laugh and glanced at his apprentice with a raised eyebrow. His robes were
soaking wet, his hair spiked in a haphazard fashion. If Qui-Gon didn't know
any better, he'd swear that his apprentice had spent the night on a landing
platform in Tipoca City, Kamino. Apparently, not all was well in the land
of romantic bliss.
"Obi-Wan, what in the name of the Force did you do to Erynne?" Obi-Wan
looked exasperated. What did HE do to ERYNNE!? SHE was the one that kicked
him out, screaming at him for no reason at all. The woman was psycho, he
was sure of it. He wasn't going back. He didn't care if she came to the
door right that instant wearing nothing but saran wrap and a smile. There
was no was in hell he was going to become her lapdog. No way.
Then he thought about it. Maybe he should have picked his robes up from off
the floor before going to bed last night. Perhaps he could have given her a
real kiss when he came home from class instead of a peck on the cheek as he
headed into the main room to watch the pod race. Maybe he could have taken
some interest when she came to the door in lingerie instead of rolling over
and falling asleep.
"Master, does she hate me?" Qui-Gon couldn't help but pity the younger man:
he looked absolutely terrible. His eyes were red-rimmed from crying, and it
looked as if he was going to cry a lot more before this was resolved. This
was the first real fight that his apprentice and his lover had dragged out
longer than a few hours, and it seemed to really bother Obi-Wan.
"I'm sure Erynne doesn't hate you. I can imagine that she's felt a little
neglected as of late, what with our constant missions and your penchant for
pod racing. Poor woman. I'm surprised she hasn't gone to Master Windu for
company." Obi-Wan's face turned the most terrible shade of green until
Qui-Gon winked, letting him know that he was just kidding. Masters
shouldn't kid about such things with their apprentices. It's bad for the
heart rate.
"All right. I'll admit I've been a little...distracted, as of late.
However, why in the Force would she be MAD at me about it? It's not like
I've been cheating on her." Qui-Gon tsked loudly and removed Obi-Wan's
soaked outer robes. He sat down on the sofa and motioned for Obi-Wan to sit
beside him. All the while, he had his recently-procured protocol droid to
brew them a fresh pot of muja tea. It was going to be a long night.
"Ahh, my very young apprentice. That's where you are wrong. While it is
true that you haven't physically cheated on her, your mind has not been
thinking of her for some time now. Erynne is a Jedi, she knows that you
haven't thought about her in any sort of desirable way in well over a month.
I don't know how you could live with a woman as lovely and wonderful as
Erynne and not kiss the ground she walks upon. You need to tell her that
you appreciate her. You need to tell her you love her. And you DEFINITELY
need to romance her." Qui-Gon laughed lightly as Obi-Wan's face went from
green to red. Ahh, so the young apprentice was embarassed about his obvious
oversight in the romance department. He was lucky: he was cute enough to
get out of any sort of romantic fiasco with his relationship still intact.
To be young again...Qui-Gon wouldn't wish it upon his worst enemy.
With that, both settled into the couch for what was bound to be a long night
of tea drinking and talking. Qui-Gon had the feeling that Ms. Erynne would
NOT allow Obi-Wan back into his apartment for quite a while until he
apologized profusely. A knock at the door proved him terribly wrong.
Qui-Gon reached the door in two strides and opened it to reveal one very
forlorn blonde. Her eyes were smudged with mascara and tears, and her long
hair was a royal mess. However, to look at Obi-Wan, you would think the
most beautiful woman in the world just walked into Qui-Gon's apartment
completely naked. The two lovers threw themselves at each other, kissing
and hugging like there was no tomorrow.
After a flurry of tear-choked thank yous, the young couple ambled back to
their aoartment arm-in-arm. Qui-Gon smiled, both happy and sad. Happy that
his apprentice had found such a beautiful and kind woman to take as a lover
and sad that the young man was finally growing up. Deep down, Qui-Gon knew
that he wasn't Obi-Wan's father, but somehow their relationship seemed to
extend beyond the normal Master-Padawan relationship. And for that
relationship, Qui-Gon was eternally grateful. Ahh, to be young again. He
wouldn't want it for all the world.
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Fin