PPark Masters race 5/8/2004

by Dan Schmalz

Art-nerd note

Global Locate has bright pink as a part of their color scheme. That's part of why I love cycling, what other American sport would have pink anywhere on a men's uniforms? Can you think of any pink uniforms in the major sports? I can't.

Cranky and Irritable

The peak of my season has come and almost gone and I have a 2nd place to show for it. I now am very close to being a complete Richard on a bike (what's short for Richard?). I need to stop for a while. I'm easily set off in races and I've been yelling and making comments at a pace that's excessive even for a loud mouth like me. So, I'll do everyone a favor and not race next weekend.

Masters and Commanders?

I needed a change of pace this weekend, so I listened to my inner Dr. Phil and chose to shake things up by doing a different field, the masters 35+. I just needed to look at a different set of rear ends. I've never done a masters field before and I expected a calm, hard pace with experienced racers. Well, not quite. I have a feeling that these guys have raced against each other for decades, and if they don't know you, they don't trust you. Fair enough. I tried to be active and make moves, but my heart wasn't really into it. As far as calm goes, I should have remembered that this is Prospect and racers are racers, no matter what age. I hate you all, well, at least for a week. I hate Dr. Phil also.

A Sport of Despair

Which brings me to my next point. We are involved in a heartbreaker of a sport. I've read a lot of online racer diaries and I can't tell you how many times I've read lines like, "I wanted to get off the bike and never ride again." From professionals! Everybody at one time or another just feels so despondent that they consider chucking the whole enterprise and taking up golf (ugh!). The amount of time and sacrifice that it takes to be just average in cycling is a huge burden sometimes. And when you factor in the winning/placing percentage of the average cyclist, you have to figure that we are nuts.

And if you have a family like I do, the effort is that mush higher. My only real goal in life right now is to not be the "Bad Dad." You know what I'm talking about; the guy whose kids resent him and his wife can't stand him. I'd like to think I'm doing pretty well so far, I might even be a good dad. Cycling is an inhibitor to being a good dad. Racers have to be self obsessed to a certain extent to be successful, and that doesn't jive with being a good dad. Let's put this whole thing into a larger context; when my daughter graduates from college or accepts an award of some sort, (here's hoping) what would be the chances of her saying "I'd like to thank my dad, who showed me what life is all about but placing in a Cat 3/4 race in Mahwah." Not bloody likely.

Schmalz Race report

Like I've said before, I don't like the classic race report format. So I'll give you my own assessment. I took off just before the bell and had a gap of 10-20 seconds, I should've just tried to stay off, but I shut it down like a chicken-poop. Should've rolled the dice, I'm an idiot.

I would put my level of suck at 7, a 10 being the highest level of suck.