For weeks I have been wandering through my life as if lost. Until now, I couldn't figure out my own mind. I realize now that what I have been feeling is my spirit telling me to set it free. To get out of the city and back where it needs to be, in the wilderness.

Sometimes I think I was born into the wrong time period. I would love to go back in time and see this land as it was...before it became the United States. Everywhere I look now all I see are the buildings and destruction of "modern" man. It tears my heart apart to think that my future children or grandchildren may have to visit a history museum to learn about the species we drove to extinction.

I am so used to telling people that I believe in life after death, and I realize now that I also believe in life BEFORE death. I want my nephew to grow up in a world where he can learn about plants and animals first hand. I don't want him to learn about our environment in the history books.

It disturbs me greatly that my ancestors are looking down upon myself and the rest of my family and seeing the destruction that we have all caused, myself included. I see life much clearer now than I did as a child. At least now I am able to take steps to better the world instead of destroy it. I hope and pray that my friends and family members will see my example and follow suit, but I'm not going to hold back and wait for them.

© May 29, 2006 Brenda Fowler. All Rights Reserved.