It's weird how my good mood can turn into nothing but feeling down in just a moment. I was only thinking about something and then that thought turned to another and then another and the next thing I know, I'm feeling all sad and having quite depressing thoughts.

Instead of sitting here alone at the computer, I'd like to just be with someone that might...*gasp*... pay attention to me and give me a reason to not have to find other things to always occupy myself. No, I haven't been at the computer all night, I am only here to search for something online and then shut things down for the night. I just allowed my mind to wander and have thoughts about how I feel, which I should know better than to do as they only make me feel even more alone. I don't expect there to be someone to constantly provide entertainment for me and whatnot and I'm sure as hell not a clingy person, it's just that I want to be WITH someone in which I have stuff in common AND enjoy being with. Is that asking too much?

19 hours of work already recorded into ETA and it's only Tuesday. I don't even know if we're allowed overtime this week. If not, I get to leave quite early one day.

My feet and left leg are cranky right now.

I totally forgot that I had my anti-inflammatory medication (Naproxen) filled yesterday and went without it today. I think that's why my feet and left leg are all cranky. I just took one of the pills and will make myself remember to do so tomorrow morning!

Well, I managed to get my desk organized, so all that is left is the dusting part. I think that organizing is enough work for one day. Perhaps I shall dust it tomorrow.

If I were the type to murder, I think I'd probably kill for a good foot massage right now. Ouchies.

We had a lot of rain today and the humidity did not treat my hair very well. Lee said it looked fine, but she's not as picky about my hair as I am. At least I'm home and the mass of curls is back in a headband and out of my way. I have no freaking clue what I'm going to do with my hair. I can't decide if I want to keep it short or let it get long like it used to be. I did like the way it was before I removed it all, so perhaps I will just aim for that style again. I hate hair that I have to actually work with, I just want to shower and go.

All of the people at work that claim to be on diets are eating tons and tons of boxes of Girl Scout cookies. Each morning they have new boxes on their desks and begin to consume them. Then, they complain about being overweight. This is something that boggles the mind. If you sit on your ass all day long and eat take out food for breakfast and lunch, then snack on cookies all day then go home and sit on your ass and eat even more, you're going to be overweight! Sheesh.

The real question about these cookies: Are they made from *real* girl scouts?

The people that ask me how I've lost 20 pounds since I returned to work claim that I don't eat enough and am starving myself when I tell them. Usually I have two scrambled eggs with coffee and juice for breakfast, sometimes with a piece of bacon if there is time. Then for lunch I have soup or a salad with a few glasses of water. Dinner is usually a meat and two veggies or just veggies and water and/or tea. Nothing fancy here and I get enough to eat while making sure I get in over 8 glasses of water per day. How is that starving to death?

I do have snacks here and there, but also am counting carbs, fat, etc. while doing so. I just eat less carbs for one meal to make up for any extras during the day. This way I don't go over my 'allowance' and feel just fine. I'm not having severe cravings and feel much better.

Another thing I don't understand is how people can go without drinking water. I mean, sodas just aren't good for you and have to make you feel like crap if that's all you drink. Even if you toss in a cup of tea or coffee, that's still not enough water for your body during any given day. It's not healthy and such habits should be changed. Even when I did consume sodas, I still drank water, just not the suggested amounts. I decided to cut out the sodas and just drink more than 8 glasses of water a day. By doing so I dropped several dress sizes. The sodas just have too many carbs in them. Even if one drinks the diet crap, it's still NOT HEALTHY!

The worst is seeing people walk by my desk carrying huge a plate with enormous servings of fried foods from the cafe in one hand and an extra large soda in the other hand. Yeah, keep complaining about the weight. It must be 'water retention' as they claim. It couldn't possibly be all the garbage that they consume all day long. Nope, couldn't be that at all.

Something that struck me as being sort of amusing this morning at 3:30 is the fact that I've never had to buy any form of birth control. It's always been provided by someone else. Even the pill form has always been the samples from the doctor or I was 'hooked up' by a nurse in the family. She could get the samples from her office so I didn't have to buy the pills. Yesterday was the first time I've actually spent money on the pills, more for the hormones to help the symptoms of the ovary syndrome I have than to actually prevent an unwanted pregnancy since I can't have children.

Those pills are like $30 a month. Wow.

The brand I am now taking is quite popular, so they aren't easy to find for free. Ah well.

Sleep lasted a bit longer for me tonight. I think I was in bed around ten or so. I think I had about 5.5 hour of sleep in a row, which is quite a record for me as of late. It was good sleep as well; I didn't wake up a million times and I don't even remember dreaming. I feel much better than I have the past couple of days, so perhaps my mood swing was due to the lack of good sleep. Now after thinking about it, the sleep most likely happened because I had taken a migraine pill before bed. I've been getting some pretty bad migraines lately and usually take the Excedrin Migraine stuff to help get rid of them. I'm thankful for the excedrin stuff because migraines are such a pain to get rid of and can ruin my evening if one appears. Usually if I get a cold washcloth and lay in bed with complete silence and darkness, they will go away eventually. Now I can do that and take the excedrin and they go away faster. For a pill that is supposedly full of caffeine, they seem to knock me out quite well.

The animals all jumped up when I hopped out of bed, I hope I didn't disturb their beauty sleep! Alexis is lying on her back with her feet up in the air next to the dog. Cloie keeps putting her paws on my leg, which usually means the food bowl isn't full enough for her. Cricket went back to her little bed next to mine, though I'm sure she will get back up when I go into the kitchen to let mason out the back door. She meows like crazy whenever I go into the kitchen at night. The cats *always* have food, yet she acts like she's starving to death all the time!

I'm babbling again. Time to go drink some water, let the dog out, let the dog back in and then get another hour or so of sleep if I can!